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Blind Duet ... with Ed (Ratleader)
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Blind Duet ... with Ed (Ratleader) |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
Blind Duet Ratleader and Janet Marie I don't know who you are, and you would never choose to be with me; yet here we stand together, trapped like riders when an elevator stalls, two people filling one square void within this little cube of time. I don't know what you like, what you can do, what sports, the books you've read, if any, whether you can drive a stick shift, have a roving eye, or one too many; if you dance, or shade the wall like me. I've seen your smile there on the page, and I've read your words in poet's spill. And though we've never met ... I believe we know more than we realize, as we have shared ourselves between the lines. To know me, one need only read my poetry, that is where you'll see the best I can be. I cant dance, and like you, I prefer to sit in the wallflower's seat. I was born left handed with two left feet. You asked about my eyes ... they are boringly brown, but when it comes down to where my heart lies, they remain true to the blue. So tell me now in poet's confide, about the shades of you kept hidden behind the shadow's hue. The words will bind in verse and rhymed remind, we don't have to dance this duet blind. The rhythm of the duet breaks for just a moment, while Ratleader takes a small hiatus. His two halves begin a thought debate (go!) versus [taken!] -- listen in: (yeah, but let's tell her just what brown eyes do, and that we'd trade them for our desert blue--) [We're here to write a poem, get the word!] (and there's no picture posted, but I've heard--) [Stop that!] (but she's so nice...) [--and taken, as I've told you twice--] (but I...) [-- and so are we, and I'm no rover!] (since you put it that way, you take over...) You're right, there's plenty still for us to tell, but in some ways we know each other well. I've seen you write of love, a woman's fears, and jade tears shed for thoughts of passing years. Missouri's beautiful, somehow you show it; when I lived there I was too blind to know it. You write of roads and shorelines; we'd have fun on California's Highway 101! You've shown me stars and lovers' birthdays promises of butterflies and Earth Days. You're humble, tell me you don't write a lot, but you show understanding I do not. You write of places I've only dreamed, taking me to places I've not yet been. Poetic landscapes pen stroked of inspired ink ... word portraits whispered on Santa Ana winds. You couldn't know as we have just met ... but many times you've written my heart. For last fall, I fell for the ocean's swell, it's there I dream to depart in inspired impart. So send me back to sand swept shores ... take me to where the tides and surf coincide. Write for me of blue waved reverie ... where sea and sky collide in constant confide. Then tell me the dreams your poetry keeps ... so that I might engrave the key to make them come true. As poets we fly free by the stroke of our pens ... if I could I would write the rhymes that gift word wings to you. You're right, we've shared some things but more remain, and common interests that we could express, and so I'll ask you, may I call again? (The gentleman politely asks for a second chance to dance) Poetically speaking ... the lady curtseys and says yes. |
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| © Copyright 2003 Janet Marie - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Free verse inner rhymes alliteration thought process a dancing duet for two would be wannabe wallflowers... HA! I am thrilled with this! As for wallflowers? That's a danged MURAL y'all have painted! |
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Susan Caldwell Member Rara Avis
since 2002-12-27
Posts 8348Florida |
Wow! This was superb! Susan |
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Ratleader
since 2003-01-23
Posts 7026Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass |
Gentlemen, you may officially begin to hope you draw Janet Marie in the next round....she's a perfect partner. And Janet Marie....I do hope for another dance. ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº> ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº> |
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snowpants Member Elite
since 2000-09-16
Posts 2061KS |
"like riders when an elevator stalls, two people filling one square void within this little cube of time." "they are boringly brown, but when it comes down to where my heart lies, they remain true to the blue." "So send me back to sand swept shores ... take me to where the tides and surf coincide. Write for me of blue waved reverie ... where sea and sky collide in constant confide. Then tell me the dreams your poetry keeps ... so that I might engrave the key to make them come true. As poets we fly free by the stroke of our pens ... if I could I would write the rhymes that gift word wings to you." this is a very clever solution to writing with someone unfamiliar...I really enjoyed reading this...it kept my attention from start to finish, which is a VERY difficult thing to do these days...  ...anyway, you two did an excellent job with something that's not all that easy...very cool, guys...the images are rather impressive, too...   sp  just a hang-up call and the quiet breathing of our persian we call cajun on a wednesday... |
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Marilyn Member Elite
since 1999-09-26
Posts 2621Ontario, Canada |
I really enjoyed this. You took the challenge and created a piece that is completely unique because of the pieces of yourselves you put there. Great read. Wonderful work. Marilyn. |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
Thank you to all, for stopping in..the duet club pairings were brought back in the hopes of bringing some new poets to the Sanctuary forums and it also creates an opportunity for us to meet fellow poets that we might not otherwise get the chance to as with Ed and I. Thank you to Ed for making this duet a pleasure for me and my contrary muse. Your idea of the duet blind date was creative and original.  |
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Duncan Member Ascendant
since 2001-08-07
Posts 5455 |
Really liked this you two! Cool idea Ed. Damn, JM...this is some sorta record for you, huh? Whacha puttin' in that raspberry tea??? |
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Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095 |
Fan - bloody - tastic! I felt like I was eaves-dropping. Enjoyed this immensely! Great work both of you. Maree |
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Midnitesun
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647Gaia |
BRAVO! ie, I love this piece! so I'll capture it and put it into MY favorites files |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
Thanks Dunc, Maree and Kacy... glad you guys enjoyed, this was fun even with my stuborn muse. The duets are a great way to jumpstart our pens. Dunc...in the tea???(poetic viagra)  Im still imagining your voice ... |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Janet Marie and Ed.... This was so original...wish I had thought of the elevator...and Ed, your little talk with yourself was sweet. You shared much of yourselves in this, still shy sharing of a small space in time. Very much enjoyed! Hugs to both of you!! |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
Thanks sweets!! Yeah...Eds idea of a blind date was too cool and a perfect metaphor for this duet... so glad you got to see this. thanks Martie.  Im still imagining your voice ... |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
Bravo! Excellent work you two...this is a wonderful blend that holds the reader and I love the sound play... Encore please! |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
*grumble grumble grumble*... I saw mention a week or so ago that a duet was in the works... and I've been waiting... and waiting... and waiting... and wondering what kind of dynamite it was gonna take to get you two to hurry up. *G* Now I learn that this has been posted but hidden away???? Geeze Louise... couldja please leave some bread crumbs next time???? LOL The only thing that stops me from stomping my feet to really emphasize my pout is that it's so very much worth waiting for... even if I waited longer than necessary. LOL (Well that... and the fact that stomping hurts my feet and the concrete isn't impressed. *G*) This is delightful... and even more so for the glimpses it gives of the poets. *S* I love it all so I can't choose a favorite part... but I will admit to chuckling through Ratleater's ruminations. *G* And the mix of free verse and rhyme is seamless and superb. *S* I love to see two wonderful poets teaming up... this is excellent! *S* [This message has been edited by suthern (06-02-2003 09:47 AM).] |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
Capt... you slave driver you.. thank you grooy guy...glad you enjoyed... now see what ya can do to get a certain porch puppy to post...me thinks someone has forgetten why we are here Ruthie-girl.... so glad ya went lurking and found us... When Local Parasite and Poet D brought back the duet club they asked us to post them over here in the hopes of bringing some attention and poets over to Sanctuary... So stop stomping those feet of yours and come join us over here...cant have enough rhyming poets for my liking thanks Ruth...glad you enjoyed Im still imagining your voice ... |
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littlewing Member Rara Avis
since 2003-03-02
Posts 9655New York |
Huge smile here . . . This is brilliant you guys! What a concept for a write. And so romantic - smiling here still this was/is/will be one of as kind always xxoo |
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Local Parasite
since 2001-11-05
Posts 2527Transylconia, Winnipeg |
I think this is going to be the crowning duet, most likely, as it's a duet about writing a duet, and somehow you guys managed to take that concept and actually write something that's entertaining and fun while at the same time, showing off your talents... I think the last time I saw something like this was from Kit and Balladeer, while it was far different from this one... I'm not really familiar with your style, Ed, so I kind of had an easier time seeing this poem from JM's point of view, but I have to say I'm really impressed with what you brought to the table here. This stanza made me laugh out loud: quote: Ptth... some gentleman. Awfully daring of you to let her have a glimpse of your internal struggle of Id versus Superego.This is terrific, you two... not at all what I was expecting, but you wrote it with a really striking chemistry... Ratleader's wit and charm versus Janet Marie's passion and innocence (for lack of a better word). Really, truly great work you guys... I'm putting this in my private library. Parasite Poets are the unacknowledged legislators of the world. |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
Did EVERYONE HEAR(SEE) that??!!!!!??? Brian called ME INNOCENT!!!! LOL@ For lack of a better word ... Me thinks MOTHY is the word youre looking for Well this was so easy to write due to Eds creative idea and his leading this duet dance, that it seems like stealing getting all these wonderful replies, and as always Brian, youre the cherry and whip cream on top with your delightful replies.. thanks groovy guy...so glad you enjoyed this one. Now if you will excuse me...Im off to doing lots of innocent things today  |
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suthern
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723Louisiana |
ROFLMAO... I saw. *G* And I'm ROFLMAO!!!! *G* I came back to appreciate the collaboration once again... didn't expect this attack of the giggles... whatever is the werk monster gonna think??? LOL |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
OK it isnt THAT funny ... I WAS innocent once you know. ( oh man, I cant even type it without laughing hysterically) ROFLMAO  |
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Ratleader
since 2003-01-23
Posts 7026Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass |
....but I was really starting to like that combination....passion and innocence...yeah, I could do a lot with that..... ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº> ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº> |
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Ratleader
since 2003-01-23
Posts 7026Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass |
.....but then there's that other winning combination, passion and experience.... ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº> ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº> |
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Larry C
since 2001-09-10
Posts 10286United States |
JM & Ed,  Just color me green. Envy on this thread for me could know no bounds! Awesome write from you both.  If tears could build a stairway and memories a lane, I'd walk right up to heaven and bring you home again. |
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garysgirl
since 2002-09-29
Posts 19237Florida, USA |
I used to think it was kind of quiet here in the santuary......I see it's gotten louder. LOL This is a woderful duet, Janet Marie and Ed, and I enjoyed it very much. I'll have to peek in here more often. Are ya'll going to do another one real soon? I hope so.  Hugs  Ethel |
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timothysangel1973
since 2001-12-03
Posts 1725Never close enough |
Wonderful write you two...I was drawn in and held as captive until the last line...then, I went back and started over! Beautiful blend of two very talented poets! Have ya'll started on the next one yet? )))hugs(((  Tima [This message has been edited by timothysangel1973 (07-13-2003 01:43 AM).] |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
Larry, Ethel, and Tima, thank you for these wonderful responses. Come join us in Sanctuary and pic a duet partner thanks guys Well ... OK ... but you have to wash it first. |
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