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in the stillness
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in the stillness |
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Midnitesun
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647Gaia 
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In the silence of midnight, when the rest of the city seems to be fast asleep, I stare at the night sky and wonder why life has to be so difficult. Why can't all the songs we sing be about Love and Peace and Harmony, not guns and death and misery? Why can't all the flowers bloom at once, so their perfumed fragrances might overpower the stench of the earth? Why can't I accept what I cannot change?Why can't I just let my heart beat freely? Too many questions and not enough answers. But maybe that's where the problem is anyway....I ask too many questions. I remember being told as a small child that I asked too many Q's and thought too much. My aunt said I'd have a brain injury if I didn't give my head a rest. Mom just told me to shut up all the time, that nobody wanted to hear such nonsense, ESPECIALLY from a child,PARTICULARLY from a female child. Well, I did shut up for many, many years. But the questions never went away, and most were never answered satisfactorily. And so here I sit, awake half the night, with the wondering whys draining whats left of my battered brain. And it's only when I distance myself from myself with a laugh that I am able to get up the next day and move forward. I keep going for the sake of my daughter, and for the innocents who cannot ask the Q's, and who depend upon me for some satisfactory A's. Thank you for putting up with my dribble. Now, excuse me, while I go and laugh at myself again. Laughter really does have great healing power. [This message has been edited by Midnitesun (05-16-2003 01:23 AM).] |
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| © Copyright 2003 Kathleen Kacy Stafford - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191Cape Cod Massachusetts USA |
In the stillness of a total eclipse is perhaps an ideal moment for ponderings... Keep on asking, m'friend - The answers will come as they may...  |
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Local Parasite
since 2001-11-05
Posts 2527Transylconia, Winnipeg |
Why laugh at yourself when you can seek the answers instead? As a child I had the same problem. I asked questions to the point where people were embarassed to hear me talking. I questioned not just things but people, I asked why it's important to be polite, I asked why certain customs are as they are, et cetera... Learned at an early age that nobody is going to give you answers to questions they've never realized existed themselves... it's up to you to go out and find answers. You just might make yourself happy. Try it sometime. Enjoyed the read, thank you for contributing to Sanctuary. Parasite Poets are the unacknowledged legislators of the world. |
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Midnitesun
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647Gaia |
Thanks Nan, for commenting. LP, and thank you very much for your comment. I appreciate your input. Yes, I do seek my own answers. But even my best answers don't always satisfy me, and that's when I stay up all night wondering if there are any answers. sometimes I simply give up and accept that I may never understand or see the whole picture. And that's OK, since I'm no God(dess). LOL |
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kaile
since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146singapore |
i feel i don't know enough yet to ask questions, so i can't exactly place myself in your shoes...also, there's this stubborn part of me who refuses to take part in introspection and such because he thinks there's a sort of perverse pride in him being ignorant and immature...though these days, i am not so reluctant to think (not sure why) and am starting to place my little grey cells to more use anyway, i'll laugh along with you...  |
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