In the silence of midnight, when the rest of the city seems to be fast asleep, I stare at the night sky and wonder why life has to be so difficult.
Why can't all the songs we sing be about Love and Peace and Harmony, not guns and death and misery?
Why can't all the flowers bloom at once, so their perfumed fragrances might overpower the stench of the earth? Why can't I accept what I cannot change?Why can't I just let my heart beat freely?
Too many questions and not enough answers.
But maybe that's where the problem is anyway....I ask too many questions. I remember being told as a small child that I asked too many Q's and thought too much. My aunt said I'd have a brain injury if I didn't give my head a rest. Mom just told me to shut up all the time, that nobody wanted to hear such nonsense, ESPECIALLY from a child,PARTICULARLY from a female child.
Well, I did shut up for many, many years. But the questions never went away, and most were never answered satisfactorily. And so here I sit, awake half the night, with the wondering whys draining whats left of my battered brain. And it's only when I distance myself from myself with a laugh that I am able to get up the next day and move forward. I keep going for the sake of my daughter, and for the innocents who cannot ask the Q's, and who depend upon me for some satisfactory A's.
Thank you for putting up with my dribble. Now, excuse me, while I go and laugh at myself again. Laughter really does have great healing power.
[This message has been edited by Midnitesun (05-16-2003 01:23 AM).]