navwin » Sanctuary » Poetic Haven » My Disservice
Poetic Haven
Post A Reply Post New Topic My Disservice Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
JP
Senior Member
since 1999-05-25
Posts 1343
Loomis, CA

0 posted 2003-05-13 08:00 PM



I've done the world a disservice.
I've shown the world me,
not all of me you see,
just shared parts and bits.
I've shared my ire,
and my biting wit.
I've shared my stern glare
my cutting sarcasm,
my litany of complaints.
I've shared my bitterness
my strife, my angst in life.
I've shared my dissonance,
my anger, distaste, and dislike.
I've silenced my foes
and bloodied those closest to me.
I've shared the worst,
the worst there is of me.
I've denied the world
a glimpse of my love
the glow of my inner light,
my constant desire to do right.
I've denied the world
through denial of myself.
I've not given in,
to compassion, love, peace.
I've railed against it all,
while resisting my soul's call.
I've shared the bits of offal
to my utter shame.
I've shared the worst of me,
and this has got to end.
I have so much more to give,
love, kindness, peace, joy.
I have spirituality and thought,
intelligence and compassion.
This is the me the world should see
this is the me they will.

Yesterday is ash, tomorrow is smoke; only today does the fire burn.
Nil Desperandum, Fata viem invenient

© Copyright 2003 JP Burns - All Rights Reserved
Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191
Cape Cod Massachusetts USA
1 posted 2003-05-13 09:42 PM


... Loveya, JP...

Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley
2 posted 2003-05-13 09:55 PM


I disagree. You had a wall up for a long time, but anyone with an ounce of heart could see behind it.
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
3 posted 2003-05-14 11:27 AM



Well, I missed it...
where did it go?



Hugs!

Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
4 posted 2003-05-14 01:20 PM


Some things you just can't hide, JP...even though you think you have.  Everything has its opposite....and I see much of it right here in this poem.
Local Parasite
Deputy Moderator 10 Tours
Member Elite
since 2001-11-05
Posts 2527
Transylconia, Winnipeg
5 posted 2003-05-15 08:47 AM


Yes, that's a very familiar feeling for me as well... I can relate.  It's almost shameful when you consider all of the things you could have done that you didn't, the kindness you could have shown when you chose not to... but this is the disservice of the world, and not just of us.  This is the way that everybody is.  A face staring towards their destination on the transit bus, not smiling at anyone, a constant expression of seriousness about them.

I happen to think your disservice, as most people's, is simply done in context... the only chances the world ever gives us to be kind are few and far between, and they're hard to spot...

I'm sure you are a kind man, JP, and there's nothing wrong with expecting people to dig a little in order to find that.

Just my little bit of input.  

Oh, and I also like the way this was written.  Not usually something I can enjoy, but this style was intriguing and didn't lose my interest.

Parasite

Poets are the unacknowledged legislators of the world.
~Percy Bysshe Shelley

JP
Senior Member
since 1999-05-25
Posts 1343
Loomis, CA
6 posted 2003-05-15 12:10 PM


Thanks LP, thanks to all of you.  Your comments are appreciated and taken to heart (damn, I think I'm tearing up... SERIOUSLY!)

LP your compliment on my style was much appreciated, remarks from an artistic master like yourself go a long way to boost my ego (the ego I am trying to diffuse BTW...)

Y'all are awesome.

Yesterday is ash, tomorrow is smoke; only today does the fire burn.
Nil Desperandum, Fata viem invenient

Midnitesun
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647
Gaia
7 posted 2003-05-15 06:33 PM


I've silenced my foes
**********************
probably not for more than a day or so *chuckling here* LOL

Many ducks have had more manure rolling off their backs than what you've dished out.
(my opinion, anyway)
But I'm sure anyone who felt your sting will appreciate the feelings you've offered in this post. You're a good man.

JP
Senior Member
since 1999-05-25
Posts 1343
Loomis, CA
8 posted 2003-05-15 07:59 PM


Ouch!

Yesterday is ash, tomorrow is smoke; only today does the fire burn.
Nil Desperandum, Fata viem invenient

Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Sanctuary » Poetic Haven » My Disservice

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary