How to Join Member's Area Private Library Search Today's Topics p Login
Main Forums Discussion Tech Talk Mature Content Archives
   Nav Win
 Sanctuary
 Poetic Haven
 A Reward Already Received
 1 2 3 4
Follow us on Facebook

 Moderated by: Poet deVine, Martie   (Admins )

 
User Options
Format for Better Printing EMail to a Friend Create a Greeting Card with this Poem
Admin Print Send ECard
Passions in Poetry

A Reward Already Received

 Post A Reply Post New Topic   Go to the Next Oldest/Previous Topic Return to Topic Page Go to the Next Newest Topic 
fractal007
Member Elite
since 06-01-2000
Posts 2032


0 posted 02-16-2003 12:56 AM       View Profile for fractal007   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions  View IP for fractal007

Frozen waters sit above
the embittered pavement,
soft, stagnant, poisoned by
our days of unrest.

Soft jets of steam rise up from
forgotten holes
that lead from lost sewers into
the dying streets.

Somewhere beyond there lies a faint
resigned scream,
and the hurried scrambling of a desperate hastily
escaping killer.

    they talked of this before
      in the papers
    but we never gave a damn.

Your feet grow tired on this
crowded succumbing land
where we fight for scraps of food.

Our hearts grow weary,
and with each passing day
they shudder at the
sound of predator human nature
growing closer to us still.

"If history is to change, let it change. If the world is to be destroyed, so be it. If my fate is to die, I must simply laugh"

-- Magus

© Copyright 2003 fractal007 - All Rights Reserved
Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 05-26-99
Posts 25869
Hurricane Alley


1 posted 02-16-2003 10:58 AM       View Profile for Poet deVine   Email Poet deVine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Poet deVine

This is really good!!! I found myself holding my breath as I read it.
LoveBug
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Moderator
Member Ascendant
since 01-08-2000
Posts 5015


2 posted 02-17-2003 04:21 PM       View Profile for LoveBug   Email LoveBug   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for LoveBug

A very haunting write.. it kinda makes me think of what could happen to us if we have a large scale attack. All the chaos and destruction... I like the structure as well.. although it's sort of like free-form, it is well constructed.

Peace I leave with you, My peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you.--Jesus Christ

Local Parasite
Deputy Moderator 10 Tours
Member Elite
since 11-05-2001
Posts 2929
Transylconia, Winnipeg


3 posted 02-26-2003 12:27 PM       View Profile for Local Parasite   Email Local Parasite   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Local Parasite's Home Page   View IP for Local Parasite

Yikes... I don't know how you do it, Frac, but somehow you always manage to give me goosebumps.  

Yes, this is bleak, ominous... just frightening.  I love your choice of title, as I love your use of language and the overall formatting of this poem.  You did a masterful job of this, my friend... keep up the quality work.  I'll keep reading.  

Parasite

"Faith" means the will to avoid knowing what is true.
~ Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

PoetryIsLife
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 10-27-2001
Posts 4115
...in my boxers...


4 posted 02-26-2003 03:33 PM       View Profile for PoetryIsLife   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for PoetryIsLife

"sound of predator human nature
growing closer to us still."

Damm good, my bond fractal man. Damn good!

Those last two lines... if you've ever read any of my work, I tend to write about human nature a lot, because I find it quite fascinating. This poem hit a tone with me, and I must say, I was duly (right word? or use?) impressed.

The meter wasn't as flowing as one might expect, but, personally, I think it was best for this piece.

~Titus

"On the plains of Hesitation lie the blackend bones of countless millions, who, at the verge of victory, sat down to wait, and waiting - died."
    

 
 Post A Reply Post New Topic   Go to the Next Oldest/Previous Topic Return to Topic Page Go to the Next Newest Topic 
All times are ET (US) Top
  User Options
>> Sanctuary >> Poetic Haven >> A Reward Already Received Format for Better Printing EMail to a Friend Create a Greeting Card with this Poem
Print Send ECard

 

pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Today's Topics | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary



© Passions in Poetry and netpoets.com 1998-2013
All Poetry and Prose is copyrighted by the individual authors