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Passions in Poetry

Chilled ( an old one)

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Cpat Hair
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Member Patricius
since 06-05-2001
Posts 12075


0 posted 12-06-2002 06:39 PM       View Profile for Cpat Hair   Email Cpat Hair   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions  View IP for Cpat Hair

I asked Merlin
From whence comes
This fog, that lies
So close and thick?

He smiled and
Pointed with chin
To the North.

"In winter,
When the days shorten
To barely leave room
For sunlight to stoop
Through days door,
Chill creeps about
In thief like passing
Unseen but felt."

"Tonight,"
Merlin whispered,
"She is seen."

I gathered cloak
And thought of the ways
You too had crept into my night


[This message has been edited by Cpat Hair (12-06-2002 06:51 PM).]

© Copyright 2002 Cpat Hair - All Rights Reserved
bsquirrel
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Member Rara Avis
since 01-03-2000
Posts 8382


1 posted 12-06-2002 07:07 PM       View Profile for bsquirrel   Email bsquirrel   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for bsquirrel

Ooo, I like this side of your work, Ron. Interesting imagery, and like how the woman is the warmth AND the cold.

Much better than my revision of an oldie -- Gray rain.
Cpat Hair
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Member Patricius
since 06-05-2001
Posts 12075


2 posted 12-06-2002 07:09 PM       View Profile for Cpat Hair   Email Cpat Hair   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Cpat Hair

thnaks mikey... I sometimes wander off into a use of classical figure or imagery and or even speach... always tended to stay away from merlin... so often done and so often not taken for symbolically.

sure wish I could spell.. (laughing)
Martie
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since 09-21-1999
Posts 28608
California


3 posted 12-06-2002 08:01 PM       View Profile for Martie   Email Martie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Martie's Home Page   View IP for Martie

Ron

A bit different, but still you catch a person and feelings within the imagery of nature.  I love how you do that!
Cpat Hair
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 06-05-2001
Posts 12075


4 posted 12-06-2002 08:13 PM       View Profile for Cpat Hair   Email Cpat Hair   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Cpat Hair

yes Martie it is a bit different for me... an older one actually written if I remember correctly... from a phrase someone threw out for writing... not one of my prouder moments here... ( laughing)
Local Parasite
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since 11-05-2001
Posts 2929
Transylconia, Winnipeg


5 posted 12-06-2002 09:23 PM       View Profile for Local Parasite   Email Local Parasite   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Local Parasite's Home Page   View IP for Local Parasite

I love the use of Merlin... particularly when you said "pointed with chin."  It's that kind of thing that you do while you read it, ya know?  Like when you're reading a book and it said "she half-coughed, half-laughed" and you stop and do it yourself before you go on...   hope I'm not the only one... heh.

The end is a bit of a twist, which I appreciate.  I was wondering where the poem was headed and then you used it as an extended comparison with a briefly mentioned subject.

Very nice, Ron.  I really like this poem.

Parasite

Facts do not cease to exist because they are ignored.
~Aldous Huxley

inkedgoddess
Member Rara Avis
since 11-19-2002
Posts 7522
Ohio


6 posted 12-06-2002 09:36 PM       View Profile for inkedgoddess   Email inkedgoddess   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for inkedgoddess


hmmm. lets see,
where do i begin..........

whence?  are you british?

in thief?

gathered cloak?

well, you asked for it........
otherwise, i kind of liked it

Alwye
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since 06-16-99
Posts 3968
In the space between moments


7 posted 12-23-2002 10:42 PM       View Profile for Alwye   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Alwye

"When the days shorten
To barely leave room
For sunlight to stoop
Through days door," -- I absolutely love that phrase.  It really stuck out to me.  Exellent poetry here, truly excellent.

*Krista Knutson*

"If we have no peace, it is because we've forgotten that we belong to each other." ~Mother Teresa

fractal007
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since 06-01-2000
Posts 2032


8 posted 12-28-2002 12:37 AM       View Profile for fractal007   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for fractal007

Hehehe, this is a neat one.  I love these mystical poems that end up personifying events through other characters referred to by the speaker.  

"If history is to change, let it change. If the world is to be destroyed, so be it. If my fate is to die, I must simply laugh"

-- Magus

 
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