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Passions in Poetry

Invisible

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Poet deVine
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Member Empyrean
since 05-26-99
Posts 25869
Hurricane Alley


0 posted 05-08-2001 08:23 PM       View Profile for Poet deVine   Email Poet deVine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions  View IP for Poet deVine


I stand alone amid the crowd
that gathers there to see
I hear the cries of anguish
the cries that come from me.

No one hears the sound I make
nor sees my bitter tears
for I am invisible and
have been this way for years.

If you could but live my life
you too would know my plight
I am a creature not of the day
nor even of the night.

I live amongst you never seen
where eyes slide away from mine
who chose to expatriate me
was this an idea of mine?

Or did you decide that I
was not worthy of your glance
did I ever seem real to you
did I ever have that chance?

I walk away with downcast eyes
my heart an empty shell
not knowing why you banished me
to my invisible hell.

© Copyright 2001 Poet deVine - All Rights Reserved
Allan Riverwood
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
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since 01-04-2001
Posts 4212
Winnipeg


1 posted 05-08-2001 08:48 PM       View Profile for Allan Riverwood   Email Allan Riverwood   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Allan Riverwood

Being invisible is not a good feeling... this poem had such a sorrowful sense to it, but you really illustrated it well.  I truly enjoyed reading this work of divinity.  
~Allan

Build a man a fire, and he's warm for a day.  Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.  
~Unknown

Irish Rose
Member Patricius
since 04-06-2000
Posts 10553


2 posted 05-08-2001 09:43 PM       View Profile for Irish Rose   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Irish Rose

This is incredibly sad and I relate to much of it.

Kathleen Blake

"When red-haired girls scamper like roses over the rain-green grass,
and the sun drips honey."
Laurie Lee

Joyce Johnson
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Member Patricius
since 03-10-2001
Posts 10059
Washington State


3 posted 05-09-2001 08:29 PM       View Profile for Joyce Johnson   Email Joyce Johnson   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Joyce Johnson

But think of all the fun you can have, being invisible.  Joyce
Dopey Dope
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since 08-30-2000
Posts 15536
San Juan, Puerto Rico


4 posted 05-13-2001 02:40 PM       View Profile for Dopey Dope   Email Dopey Dope   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Dopey Dope

Well done! Wow the ending was to amazing. Invisible hell.....i loved that....very very very well done! I enjoyed the poem.

I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I'm in love with my shadow
I admire it daily

LoveBug
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since 01-08-2000
Posts 5015


5 posted 05-17-2001 10:29 PM       View Profile for LoveBug   Email LoveBug   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for LoveBug

Sharon, I know what it's like to feel invisible... you describe it so well, and I hope that this isn't a situation you find yourself in very often. Wonderful work, as usual.

"Men judge generally more by the eye than by the hand, for everyone can see and few can feel."-Machiavelli

anonymous albert ?
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since 03-23-2001
Posts 4172


6 posted 05-27-2001 09:36 PM       View Profile for anonymous albert ?   Email anonymous albert ?   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for anonymous albert ?

this was over awesome...the ending was what hit me the hardest...i loved this piece!

i'm addicted to passions in poetry!...are you?

brian madden
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since 05-06-2000
Posts 4532
ireland


7 posted 05-30-2001 06:35 PM       View Profile for brian madden   Email brian madden   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for brian madden

there are times when we feel like we are invisible and other times when we wish we were. When you feel ignored you just have to try and make yourself heard. Easier siad than done.

Words I can well relate to though, thanks for sharing  

"you are what you own in this land, you can be king and it all depends on the view and what you can see"  Whipping boy

Yu Lan
Senior Member
since 04-13-2000
Posts 1486
New Zealand


8 posted 06-01-2001 06:12 AM       View Profile for Yu Lan   Email Yu Lan   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Yu Lan

well done Sharon..   I enjoyed reading it.
Hey, when it is like this, I usually find that there always is someone to notice you.. perhaps, u don't notice it.. but there is always someone..
Love
Lynne
catalinamoon
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Member Rara Avis
since 06-03-2000
Posts 9897
The Shores of Alone


9 posted 06-21-2001 08:56 PM       View Profile for catalinamoon   Email catalinamoon   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit catalinamoon's Home Page   View IP for catalinamoon

Painful thoughts,Sharon. You well expressed the feeling. I have had it.
Sandra
Sven
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since 11-23-1999
Posts 15611
Lansing, MI USA


10 posted 06-23-2001 06:11 PM       View Profile for Sven   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Sven

I've found that the only way to be visible is to make them see you. . .

great feelings here. . . I like it. . .

--------------------------------------------------------

To the world, you may only be one person. But to one person, you may be the world.

Honeybee
Member Ascendant
since 12-26-1999
Posts 5512
Ontario, CANADA


11 posted 06-23-2001 06:29 PM       View Profile for Honeybee   Email Honeybee   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Honeybee


Oh Sharon, if only I could express to you how much this touched me - how much I relate, the last verse is so striking and powerful!~

Take care,
Melissa~
Dark Angel
Member Patricius
since 08-04-99
Posts 10270


12 posted 07-10-2001 07:48 PM       View Profile for Dark Angel   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Dark Angel

This is so sad Sharon, I felt the pain.
Great writing dear.

Maree  

"little miss understood
little misunderstood"

~Marry me Jane~

JLR
Senior Member
since 02-04-2001
Posts 1851


13 posted 07-10-2001 09:32 PM       View Profile for JLR   Email JLR   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for JLR

This made me think of the way people look, or don't look...into the eyes of those society deems 'undesirable'.  Very effectively written!
Jamie
Member Elite
since 06-26-2000
Posts 3219
Blue Heaven


14 posted 07-23-2001 06:07 PM       View Profile for Jamie   Email Jamie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Jamie's Home Page   View IP for Jamie

Sometimes it is as simple as saying-- here I am, most often however you have to SCREAM!

A very well done and heartbreakingly sad poem.

There is society where none intrudes, by the deep sea, and music in its roar.
byron

chasing rain
Senior Member
since 05-15-2001
Posts 1281
Canada


15 posted 07-25-2001 12:12 PM       View Profile for chasing rain   Email chasing rain   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for chasing rain

Nicely done, and you portray invisibility well! Great work here!

-haeL

Va pensiero sull' ali dorate...

 
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