I remember tracing your eyes

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Streen
Member

since 2001-11-28

Posts 169

0 posted 2002-02-07 07:46 PM

I remember tracing your eyes
with tips of fingers; caressing
your cheek with teared thumbs,
etching, burning into my tablet,
with pale nails into amber wax
crisp details of morning lips,
faint of purlish hue; remembering
compliments to courses of Venus,
writ deeply onto rosy cheeks
melting into memory succulent
smile after sparkling water lying
in fields of wheat that flowed,
a blow of wind across delicate hair;
Plummiting into depths of your
azure eyes my heart became
lost in sky's maze and suddenly
surprisingly forgot all that
it had strived to remember.
And I gasped with wonder.

strbbux
Member Elite

since 2001-12-19

Posts 3859

1 posted 2002-02-07 07:52 PM

Nice imagery here, I really like how you write streen.

floria

Floria

"Alas for those that never sing,
But die with all their music in them"
(Oliver Wendell Holmes)

Mistletoe Angel

Member Empyrean

since 2000-12-17

Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon

2 posted 2002-02-07 08:02 PM

(sigh) Soooooooo beautiful, sweet friend, your lovely words always trace these pages with sunshine and smiles! (big hugggssss) We all love you so much, sweet frind, this is wonderful! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Streen, thank you for sharing!

May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

amusemi
Senior Member

since 2001-12-08

Posts 1262
A State of Disarray

3 posted 2002-02-07 11:25 PM

Abstract piece, but a very incredible read. I read it aloud and liked the flow. I hope you post more!!

This shows a depth of love that is tremendous...I liked this very much!

Mysteria

Member Laureate

since 2001-03-07

Posts 18328
British Columbia, Canada

4 posted 2002-02-08 01:28 AM

Excellent work, I loved it!

The older I grow, the less important the comma becomes.
Let the reader catch their own breath."
~Elizabeth Clarkson Zwart~

Kethry
Member Rara Avis

since 2000-07-29

Posts 9082
Victoria Australia

5 posted 2002-02-08 07:43 AM

streen,
I was captured by the flow of the poem and the thoughts are good as well.
Write on
Kethry

Here in the midst of my lonely abyss, a single joy I find...your presence in my mind. Unknown

Victoria

Member Ascendant

since 2000-08-12

Posts 5869

6 posted 2002-02-08 08:16 AM

You described it well..a wonderful feeling isnt it?

~Victoria~

You can complain because roses have thorns, or you can rejoice because thorns have roses.

-Ziggy

PearlsB4Swine
Member

since 2002-02-01

Posts 130
where the heart finds me

7 posted 2002-02-08 08:58 AM

It is a wonder how we strive to remember the faintest detail, only to lose the image as quickly as we grasp it. Well said.

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