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Open Poetry #18
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Tim
Senior Member
since 1999-06-08
Posts 1794


0 posted 2002-01-27 10:21 PM


When I hear the word critique,
I must admit my knees go weak,
I'm not so dumb, that I don't know it,
That I am lacking, as a poet.

Iambic what? I am a dunce,
I don't know rhyme, from my assonance,
Pentameter, is that some race?
Petrarchan who? from outer space?

I write a poetic witticism,
Then feel harsh bite of criticism,
My battered soul, to world lay bare,
You strap me in, your electric chair.

You skewer me on critic's spit,
Every single ode I've writ.
Why don't you get what my words mean?
Why must you chop, like guillotine?

All right, you win, I'll write no more,
My poetry, is out the door,
Gone forever, no more I'll bomb,
Fini, I hope, your happy Mom.

(Please don't tell Mom, I told a lie,
I'll keep on writing, just on the sly,
If you don't squeal, she'll never know,
So pen to paper, and on with the show.}

[This message has been edited by Tim (01-27-2002 10:41 PM).]

© Copyright 2002 Tim - All Rights Reserved
Morcastlin
Member
since 2002-01-14
Posts 244
The Jersey Shore, USA
1 posted 2002-01-27 10:27 PM


Oh, this was marvelous! Very cleverly done! Bravo!

Love,
Bonnie

doreen peri
Member Elite
since 1999-05-25
Posts 3812
Virginia
2 posted 2002-01-27 10:30 PM


LOL!!!!!! i LOVE it!! i feel the same way exactly only i couldn't write it nearly as well  as this and if i tried to, hell, somebody would say they didn't understand it but they really liked it... hehe.... i get a lot of that

but anyway,,... seriously.... i LOVE this!!! great write, Tim!!

ThUnDeRkYsS
Senior Member
since 1999-09-23
Posts 727
Wisconsin
3 posted 2002-01-27 10:33 PM


Great job here, like the ending... sort of fun

Strive for higher levels, if they seem out of reach... Grow, and they will get closer.



RosePetal
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2001-08-26
Posts 2985
South Florida
4 posted 2002-01-27 10:38 PM


Tim this is a cool poem...I never critique anyone's poem unless the specifically ask me what they can do to improve it
Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
5 posted 2002-01-27 10:42 PM


Tim--You are one of the best..I keep telling you!
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