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Passions in Poetry

I Wish You Were Here

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Mistletoe Angel
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since 12-17-2000
Posts 34089
City of Roses


0 posted 01-19-2002 09:25 PM       View Profile for Mistletoe Angel   Email Mistletoe Angel   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions   Click to visit Mistletoe Angel's Home Page   View IP for Mistletoe Angel


I Wish You Were Here
By: Noah Eaton
1/19/02

Jewels of your crown fill your night
Tiaras of flowers fill your eyes
I rise up from the sand of my wasteland
Reaching for the galaxies begging for your hand

I wish you were here…

The rain still hasn’t stopped falling
I sit by the frozen pond, throwing stones upon the ice
I gaze at the ripples branching across the waters
Seeing the reflection of your face in my mind…

I wish you were here…

Phantoms hang like posters on my walls
Waiting for the candlelight of your heart to reveal your art
I want to hold you so badly…
I want to rest close to your heart…

I wish you were here…
I wish you were here…
I wish you were here…
I wish you were here…
I promise I'll be here when you come…

[This message has been edited by Mistletoe Angel (01-19-2002 09:25 PM).]

© Copyright 2002 Lisping Hibiscus - All Rights Reserved
ecrivan
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since 12-10-2001
Posts 3983
my own state


1 posted 01-19-2002 09:33 PM       View Profile for ecrivan   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit ecrivan's Home Page   View IP for ecrivan

Noah, I like the mood and a melody could even be worked in however... just a pointer that if you're going to have a frozen pond on one line, how can you have ripples on the second? Perhaps what you can do is show yourself in different seasons at the same pond and the reader will see the continuum of your love throughout the year.I know what you mean of course, I just think that the ice and the ripples are too close here

Startime
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since 10-03-2000
Posts 6143
Canada


2 posted 01-19-2002 09:35 PM       View Profile for Startime   Email Startime   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Startime's Home Page   View IP for Startime

*sigh* such yearning fills these words..they touch the heart of your reader with ease and let them feel the desire of your wish..**big hugs**

Love I leave with you whether it is in your life now or yet the essense of your dreams.

Victoria
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since 08-12-2000
Posts 6020


3 posted 01-19-2002 09:38 PM       View Profile for Victoria   Email Victoria   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Victoria

lovely Noah..i can tell your heart is overflowing with love dear..hugss...

                 ~Victoria~

You can complain because roses have thorns, or you can rejoice because thorns have roses.

                                                -Ziggy

Hypnosis
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since 12-02-2001
Posts 334
CO


4 posted 01-19-2002 09:55 PM       View Profile for Hypnosis   Email Hypnosis   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Hypnosis

This is great Noah, hopefully soon you can create a poem titled "I'm glad you're here"  Great job Noah!

    From your good friend
      Randy Meador

a life lived unexplored is a life not worth living.

RosePetal
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since 08-26-2001
Posts 3414
South Florida


5 posted 02-05-2002 02:56 PM       View Profile for RosePetal   Email RosePetal   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for RosePetal

Awwwwwww, I know just how you feel, know that you will always be mine and I'll love you always! (kiss kiss) I love you sweetie!

Your Guinevere,
Joanna

vandana
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since 10-22-1999
Posts 10748
USA


6 posted 02-05-2002 06:58 PM       View Profile for vandana   Email vandana   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for vandana

liked it
DayDreamer99
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since 01-23-2002
Posts 75


7 posted 02-05-2002 07:06 PM       View Profile for DayDreamer99   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for DayDreamer99

aww *BIG HUGS*

**I want to hold you so badly…
  I want to rest close to your heart…**

*sigh*...i loved the poem..today is my "mourning over my ex boyfriend" day..even though we fought i still miss the way he made me feel like a princess *sigh* o well...i loved your poem...It adds to my day! lol bye! *kisses ya lightly*

Tifferz

~*~*~The Day You Chose To Leave Me,It Rained Constantly Outside,In Truth I Swore The Rain To Be,Tears From Cupids Eyes"..RIP 2Pac~*~*~
strbbux
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since 12-19-2001
Posts 3975


8 posted 02-05-2002 07:48 PM       View Profile for strbbux   Email strbbux   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for strbbux

Oh I wish your wish comes true Noah, and oh how I wish someone wrote like that about me. LOL. you are too sweet. floria

Floria

"Alas for those that never sing,
But die with all their music in them"
(Oliver Wendell Holmes)

serenity blaze
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since 02-02-2000
Posts 28839


9 posted 02-05-2002 08:23 PM       View Profile for serenity blaze   Email serenity blaze   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for serenity blaze

I'll just bet you didn't know that "wish you were here," by Pink Floyd is my theme song..

this is still one of the most simple and yet poignant pleas, I know. Hugs, sweet Noah.
Sunshine
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since 06-25-99
Posts 67715
Listening to every heart


10 posted 02-05-2002 08:49 PM       View Profile for Sunshine   Email Sunshine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Sunshine's Home Page   View IP for Sunshine


I'm thinking I'm glad I am! Nice job, Noah!
catalinamoon
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since 06-03-2000
Posts 9897
The Shores of Alone


11 posted 02-05-2002 09:07 PM       View Profile for catalinamoon   Email catalinamoon   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit catalinamoon's Home Page   View IP for catalinamoon

Noah, this is so plaintive.I feel this way so often. I think you will have her there with you someday.
Sandra
quietwaters
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since 02-04-2002
Posts 30
delray beach, florida


12 posted 02-05-2002 09:20 PM       View Profile for quietwaters   Email quietwaters   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for quietwaters


Noah...

I know too well how to murder my work...until I lose sight of all intended rhythm...you were wise to let the song twist itself like that...sometimes we readers forget that a wealth of words need not be there...even between impossibilities...to recognize a lovely song has just been sang...
and we only need to soar along on the highest note already there...

Your heart beats out the sweetest rhythms...sing on..  

Bill Charles
Member Patricius
since 07-11-2000
Posts 11011
highways, & byways, for now


13 posted 02-05-2002 11:40 PM       View Profile for Bill Charles   Email Bill Charles   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Bill Charles

Noah - if you keep writing like this, she has to be on the way...

BC
HopeS
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since 12-22-2000
Posts 4613
Perth Western Australia


14 posted 02-06-2002 12:14 AM       View Profile for HopeS   Email HopeS   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit HopeS's Home Page   View IP for HopeS

felt the yearning and longing Noah
your heart expressed all the love you will give
Hugs Hope
Interloper
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Member Rara Avis
since 11-06-2000
Posts 8628
Deep in the heart


15 posted 02-07-2002 09:55 AM       View Profile for Interloper   Email Interloper   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Interloper

Your feeling melted the frozen pond just before the stone hit, allowing the ripples ... yes?

Fool, said my Muse to me, look in thy heart and write.

N orth Carolina Girl
Senior Member
since 12-04-2001
Posts 984
NC,USA


16 posted 02-07-2002 11:29 AM       View Profile for N orth Carolina Girl   Email N orth Carolina Girl   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for N orth Carolina Girl

Noah,so full of love.




Juanita

"always have a smile on your face it makes people wonder what you`re up to:

ParisGrl
Senior Member
since 06-01-2000
Posts 610


17 posted 02-07-2002 12:17 PM       View Profile for ParisGrl   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for ParisGrl

Noah,

This poem is beautiful.  I enjoyed it very much.

~Laura~
BluesSerenade
Member Rara Avis
since 10-23-2001
Posts 9867
By the Seaside


18 posted 02-07-2002 12:41 PM       View Profile for BluesSerenade   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for BluesSerenade

The longing is evident!
Noah, your poems are so full of passion
and a strong sense of desire.
I so enjoy reading your heartfelt words.
PearlsB4Swine
Member
since 02-01-2002
Posts 131
where the heart finds me


19 posted 02-07-2002 06:39 PM       View Profile for PearlsB4Swine   Email PearlsB4Swine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for PearlsB4Swine

In some poems, the words leap off the page, like they are spoken.  You do this type of poetry so well, Noah.  Your compassion is well-displayed in this!

PB4S
bsquirrel
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since 01-03-2000
Posts 8382


20 posted 09-04-2002 01:41 PM       View Profile for bsquirrel   Email bsquirrel   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for bsquirrel

I definitely felt it, Noah.

Mike
passing shadows
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since 08-26-99
Posts 46297
displaced


21 posted 01-22-2003 03:12 AM       View Profile for passing shadows   Email passing shadows   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for passing shadows

reminds me of the song by Incubus...beautiful!
 
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