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Open Poetry #18
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serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738


0 posted 2002-01-11 12:34 PM


A tinkling of rain in weep
a water stone's eternity
a trickling becoming stream
as watergrasses hide tadpole.


Snow upon majestic peaks
return of sun, diminishing
breast of Mother Earth in weep
streams becoming river's flow.


River flows in wicked wide
a river grows and pulls a tide
insides of the earth wax wild
going where the wind might blow.


Edge of water--delta pride--
sea begs to see in ocean's eyes--
eats hungrily the sands of time
in waves of rabid foam.


Refrain of symphony's intend.
Water vapors, sworling wind...
newborn clouds, pregnant with rain--
creation must create again.


© Copyright 2002 serenity blaze - All Rights Reserved
Charms85
New Member
since 2002-01-11
Posts 2

1 posted 2002-01-11 12:54 PM


wow. that was a very lovely poem. I'm sorry. I would make it more constructive, but it's well past midnight, and I must get some rest soon. I'm very sorry. But from a poet to a poet, I can say that your poem was deeply motivating and inspiring. Thanks for such a beautiful poem.
Irish Rose
Member Patricius
since 2000-04-06
Posts 10263

2 posted 2002-01-11 09:35 AM


this makes nature come completely alive.....well done and I mean that

Kathleen--(Kay)
A true friend does not love you for who you are, but in spite of who you are." -- Caroline Tran

Canuckster
Member
since 2002-01-09
Posts 285
New Mexico, USA
3 posted 2002-01-11 09:36 AM


your words model the creative process you describe.  Good marriage of subject with style.  Thanks fo this good read.
Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

4 posted 2002-01-11 12:53 PM


A tinkling of rain in weep
a water stone's eternity
====================================
breast of Mother Earth in weep
streams becoming river's flow.

River flows in wicked wide
a river grows and pulls a tide
insides of the earth wax wild
going where the wind might blow.


Edge of water--delta pride--
sea begs to see in ocean's eyes--
eats hungrily the sands of time
in waves of rabid foam.

Refrain of symphony's intend.
===============================
creation must create again.


You do know how very COOL this poem is dont you...
its damn cool...its groovy waaay cool
love this me mystic poetess of rhyme divine



I ask why you come here, you say just because
Could I live without it if I knew what it was
But it really dont matter when you look at me that way.

Bill Charles
Member Patricius
since 2000-07-11
Posts 10619
highways, & byways, for now
5 posted 2002-01-11 09:21 PM


serenity - you write with such depth of you, and your writings are just, well just, u'mmmm, just the bestest...

BC

Sven
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937
East Lansing, MI USA
6 posted 2002-01-12 12:48 PM


aha. . . now, this is a portrait of the author's universe. . .

one that speaks to us all. . . well done. . .

--------------------------------------------------------

To the world, you may only be one person. But to one person, you may be the world.

doreen peri
Member Elite
since 1999-05-25
Posts 3812
Virginia
7 posted 2002-01-12 12:54 PM


you have a command of the sounds of the english language that is dynamic and exhuberant and mesmerising

your poetry is uniquely you and embodies your heart

the syntax, the meter, the rhythm, the images....... the soul of it.... all of it.... it's serenely well done

catalinamoon
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-03
Posts 9543
The Shores of Alone
8 posted 2002-01-12 07:39 AM


Yep, what Doreen said
Sandra

strbbux
Member Elite
since 2001-12-19
Posts 3859

9 posted 2002-01-12 10:49 AM


Oh I like what you do with words Serenity. floria
GenXer
Senior Member
since 2001-12-15
Posts 583
USA
10 posted 2002-01-12 02:45 PM


Serenity - Beautiful imagery.  Really liked how each stanza building upon the previous one.  Well done.


Dave

Mistletoe Angel
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Empyrean
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon
11 posted 2002-01-12 02:52 PM






(smiles) Ooooooohhh, this is soooooo gorgeous, sweet friend, it's like the cycle of life repeating itself, where the desert dries the stream only to see the rain fall again once more! This is a gorgeous symphony of nature, sweet friend, I love it!!! (kiss on cheek) You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Karen, thank you for sharing!



May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

bsquirrel
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855

12 posted 2002-10-04 05:55 PM


Please please please please please please please write a book and send it to me!!!

Encino, CA 91316


Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

13 posted 2003-01-29 12:49 PM



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