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Open Poetry #18
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Startime
Member Ascendant
since 2000-10-03
Posts 5918
Canada

0 posted 2002-01-09 07:03 PM


Untouched Love

Untouched love,
never seen
Holding me,
hopeful dreams

Flashing eyes,
gazing deep
Reaching out,
restless sleep

Sharing words,
written rhyme
Singing true,
clearest chime

Giving trust,
open hearts
Knowing him,
magic charms

Kisses sent,
gentle touch
Wishing still,
untouched love

Karen Torbiak ©

Love I leave with you whether it is in your life now or yet the essense of your dreams.

© Copyright 2002 Karen Torbiak - All Rights Reserved
Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla
1 posted 2002-01-09 07:05 PM


Karen,
Lovely, .

Madame Chipmunk
Member Rara Avis
since 2001-12-05
Posts 8296
Michigan
2 posted 2002-01-09 07:15 PM


Beautiful, well written and very romantic, Karen.  Now I am out of words.
Wonderful job!

copyright2001 Lyra Nesius

"poetry is life distilled"  Gwendolyn Brooks

Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
3 posted 2002-01-09 07:16 PM


Very very nicely said Karen!
I love this one!
~Hugs, Nancy~

~* A dream is a wish your heart makes... *~

Canuckster
Member
since 2002-01-09
Posts 285
New Mexico, USA
4 posted 2002-01-09 07:16 PM


Well done.  The meter and short breathless bursts of each line exude power and emotion and make this work a reflection not unlike the thoughts and emotions of passion with a background rythm that adds to the mix effectively.
catalinamoon
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-03
Posts 9543
The Shores of Alone
5 posted 2002-01-09 09:00 PM


Don't you just hate that UNtouched part? It's not fair, is it..
Let's start working on Cupid, I agree, Santa was a dismal failure.
And aside from all that, I like the way you did this poem
Sandra

Silver Streak
Member Elite
since 2002-01-02
Posts 3625
FL, USA
6 posted 2002-01-09 09:06 PM


Karen, this was breathless. It was like riding a bicycle next to someone you love and can't let go of the handle bars. And so you look and pedal and look. Thanks for sharing.     -newell

Sharing God's Love through perfectlovepoetry.com]

Copyright: 2002 Newell Elsworth Usher

[This message has been edited by Silver Streak (01-09-2002 09:15 PM).]

Suetang
Member Ascendant
since 2001-03-07
Posts 5187
Melbourne, Australia
7 posted 2002-01-09 09:19 PM


Hello Karen
Your words literally danced on the page and were filled with so much love and romance.
Very much enjoyed!  Take care......Sue

Suetang

Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774
Ontario, Canada
8 posted 2002-01-09 09:31 PM


I loved the rhythm in this piece Karen ... it complimented the words beautifully, very nicely written!

Best wishes,
/Kit

JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
9 posted 2002-01-09 09:50 PM


Enjoyed...James
Greeneyes
Deputy Moderator 50 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-09-09
Posts 9903
In Your Poetic Mind
10 posted 2002-01-09 09:55 PM


Karen~

you write of love so beautifully...I can only sigh when I read you....


Lauren~

Tomorrow's another day
and I'm thirsty any way
so bring on the rain

GenXer
Senior Member
since 2001-12-15
Posts 583
USA
11 posted 2002-01-09 11:01 PM


Karen - I liked the style and the flow of this one.  Really good.

Dave

Magnus
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 2001-10-10
Posts 14135
South Carolina, USA
12 posted 2002-01-09 11:12 PM


Karen,  I write romance....you write
passion,  fire,  sensuality,  ....  with
such grace and flow...

Bill Charles
Member Patricius
since 2000-07-11
Posts 10619
highways, & byways, for now
13 posted 2002-01-09 11:28 PM


Karen - I know you wrote this just for me, BC. Lovely, just lovely...

BC

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