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Open Poetry #18
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SEA
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with you

0 posted 2002-01-05 12:31 PM



It was in that very moment
it was written bold in his eyes
storm clouds of darkest grey brewing
trying hopelessly to disguise

I waited and watched
for chance to convey
words from my heart
wanted desperately to say

Maybe it was his pride
or perhaps it was my own
it doesn’t really matter
with the time so quickly flown

I thought he might say it
I know he thought I’d cry
but the only thing I was able to do
was smile and say good bye

Now the words are choking me
as they were left here on tip of tongue
when they should have been voiced
in some poetic fashion, or gently sung

I should have said ‘I love you’
and not gave a damn to consequence
I should have said ‘I love you’
and let go of self defense…..


~SEA~

"...and she swears there's nothing wrong
I hear her playin that same ol song"~Fuel~Bad Day

© Copyright 2002 S.E. A - All Rights Reserved
Startime
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since 2000-10-03
Posts 5918
Canada
1 posted 2002-01-05 12:35 PM


*sigh* sometimes we let our fears dictate too much to us and lose something precious. My heart goes out to you....I know this feeling well. **big hugs**

Love I leave with you whether it is in your life now or yet the essense of your dreams.

Larry C
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2 posted 2002-01-05 12:37 PM


Susan,
You didn't! Really? I don't believe it. I think it's just a poem...a good poem...but just a poem. I love you're poetry but I thought you were always on the otherside of this subject. Surpise.

Jamie
Member Elite
since 2000-06-26
Posts 3168
Blue Heaven
3 posted 2002-01-05 12:43 PM


Nice poem SEA-- I'm with Larry on this one-- you seem to be more of an I did- rather than a I shoulda...
enjoyed this

There is society where none intrudes, by the deep sea, and music in its roar.
byron

ecrivan
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since 2001-12-10
Posts 3923
my own state
4 posted 2002-01-05 01:01 AM


A touching poem, maybe just wanting to be more thoughtful when you are already?Nicely done.


Marsha
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Maidstone Kent England
5 posted 2002-01-05 01:26 AM


Circe darling girl YOU do know you're on the Crying List don't you? And if you hadn't made it already you would have made it with this one.
Wonderful writing darling girl absolutely wonderful. Now go and read the poem and deliver your punishment.

I would give you a time to have it delivered by but I haven't anyone else so it wouldn't be fair However before my birthday would be nice. That's 14 days dearest sister of my heart.

Do I love this? YES I Do, does it excuse you? NO it doesn't

Good luck with the punishment I suppose you want the link? Okay
/pip/Forum53/HTML/000128.html

Love and warm stuff
As always
Mushy

     
  

To give light to them that sit in darkness..... to guide our feet into the way of peace St John ch2 v1


Logan
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since 2001-05-28
Posts 1641
Arkansas
6 posted 2002-01-05 01:59 AM


Ahhh, SEA, for these thoughts can torment with the what ofs, but then again, it is living with the if dids..very gentle smile..A very very good write and read
JamesMichael
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since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
7 posted 2002-01-05 02:19 AM


Yes and those moments do arrive if we stick with it...James
Midnitesun
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Gaia
8 posted 2002-01-05 03:33 AM


"I should have said ‘I love you’
and not gave a damn to consequence
I should have said ‘I love you’
and let go of self defense….."

Carpe diem. "It's now or never...
Tomorrow may be too late." Remember what the King sang?

Kethry
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082
Victoria Australia
9 posted 2002-01-05 07:01 AM


SEA,
I'll have another of your regret concoctions, this one took my breath away.
Keth

Here in the midst of my lonely abyss, a single joy I find...your presence in my mind.  Unknown



Sunshine
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since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
10 posted 2002-01-05 07:19 AM



Darn that old self-defense...but one never knows fully...you listened to the heart in this one, SEA...and you did it proud...

Dee
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since 2000-08-19
Posts 2330
Queensland, Australia
11 posted 2002-01-05 07:36 AM


Susan....you shoulda!
Dee

I wish you every happiness and may you always have the best of the good things in life.     a brand

Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

12 posted 2002-01-05 07:38 AM


                     Now the words are choking me
                    as they were left here on tip of tongue
                    when they should have been voiced
                    in some poetic fashion, or gently sung

                    I should have said ‘I love you’
                    and not gave a damn to consequence
                    I should have said ‘I love you’
                    and let go of self defense…..

======================================

aching regret set to rhyme divine....
so sad

Enchantress
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since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
13 posted 2002-01-05 09:28 AM


Susan...this is soooo good!  Now you know you shoulda let down your defenses.
~Hugs, Nancy~

~* A dream is a wish your heart makes... *~

Marge Tindal
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Florida's Foreverly Shores
14 posted 2002-01-05 09:32 AM


SEA~
Ohhhhhhhh ... this is poignantly perfect~
*Hugs*
~*Marge*~

~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
       noles1@totcon.com                   

hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750
Glen Hope, PA USA
15 posted 2002-01-05 09:36 AM


Oh, how often life is full of should haves...sometimes we just have to quit beating ourselves up over what we should have done and try not to make the same mistake twice. I've missed reading yours and other's work here...it's nice to be home, even for a short while
SmartChick
Member Rara Avis
since 2001-09-23
Posts 7081
On A Journey To The Unknown
16 posted 2002-01-05 09:44 AM


Awww Sea, this is so sad. We have to try not to think of the "should haves", cause it can surely keep us down. I wish you the best of luck.
Interloper
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Deep in the heart
17 posted 2002-01-05 10:08 AM


Woulda, shoulda, coulda ... it could become our worldwide motto.
It never hurts to say "I love you" if you mean it.
When I get my heart put back together I will read on ... a wonderfully aching write, gal.

Fool, said my Muse to me, look in thy heart and write.

walker
Member Elite
since 2001-02-11
Posts 2240
Florida
18 posted 2002-01-05 10:42 AM


I've had those moments, and those words can't come out. Great poem.
Larry C
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United States
19 posted 2002-01-05 10:48 AM


SEA,
I have always considered you to be a tender hearted person...but the suspense here is killing me. Cough it up, it's just a poem, right?

vandana
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20 posted 2002-01-05 11:07 AM


nice
Mistletoe Angel
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21 posted 2002-01-05 11:22 AM




(big hugggssssss) Oh Susan, this is so so heataching, I hope all is well with you and you found the chance to express how you feel. (kiss on cheek) So sad but beautiful, sweet friend, we all love you so much! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Susan, thank you for sharing!



May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

SEA
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with you
22 posted 2002-01-05 11:24 AM


my goodness, I didn't expect this.....
ok Larry, quit holding your breath, you know perfectly well, I am a complete sucker for love.....I would be the one to say it, I can't stand the idea of someone not knowing how I feel about them.....regardless of how it might hurt me.

There is one from my past, that perhaps this came from...I should have told him, and I didn't. I went back to find him once, to just let him know, and I couldn't find him. It is a regret I'll live with forever.

Thank you all for reading, you've made my day!!

(happy now Larry? )

"...and she swears there's nothing wrong
I hear her playin that same ol song"~Fuel~Bad Day

strbbux
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since 2001-12-19
Posts 3859

23 posted 2002-01-05 02:30 PM


Regrets, yes I know about regrets, this was just lovely sea. floria
Madame Chipmunk
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since 2001-12-05
Posts 8296
Michigan
24 posted 2002-01-05 06:18 PM


You turned a sad regret into a lovely poem, Sue....at least you've done something constructive with a regret...
Thats more than most of us can say.
Great job!

copyright2001 Lyra Nesius

"poetry is life distilled"  Gwendolyn Brooks

Larry C
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25 posted 2002-01-05 06:21 PM


Susan,
I knew it...I knew it! Wheh. That's a relief. Thanks...and by the way, a nice poem.

SEA
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with you
26 posted 2002-01-05 07:38 PM


again, I thank you all for reading and Larry, I knew you knew thank you
vandana
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27 posted 2002-02-20 05:17 PM


enjoyed
passing shadows
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displaced
28 posted 2003-01-22 03:26 AM


susan, I just felt this last night, funny, I guess...this is what I needed to read tonight. Thanks.
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