navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #18 » Misdirection : A Gloom Sonnet
Open Poetry #18
Post A Reply Post New Topic Misdirection : A Gloom Sonnet Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
Professor Gloom
Member Elite
since 2000-07-23
Posts 3082
of Depression

0 posted 2002-01-03 02:54 PM


Beggars wallow in the gutters flowing
Nowhere to be and nothing for growing,
Ladies too rich and fat saunter on by,
With nose in the air and looks to the sky.

Tossing crust to birds while the starving cry.

Children huddle in cold windy places,
Chattering teeth rattle their small faces,
Men of virtue will not give them a look,
But build bon fires to destroy a book.

Tossing on a book while the freezing cry.

Money and great power building strong states,
While the poor and hungry slowly just waits.
Compassion has left the leaders of man
As they build with a misdirected hand.

Gloom


© Copyright 2002 Aszard Drazlom - All Rights Reserved
serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

1 posted 2002-01-03 03:02 PM


There ya go again, messing up this perfectly good pity party I was having-- .

This is awesome. Great message and the form is fantastic. And I do agree!

EllenMoran
Junior Member
since 2002-01-03
Posts 24

2 posted 2002-01-03 03:27 PM


I love the choice to repeat "Tossing" here ... such a carefree, thoughtless action -- a perfect fit with those described, and re-examining the positive connotation we give those terms almost unthinkingly.
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
3 posted 2002-01-03 04:01 PM



The truth of this builds as high as the fire.  Thank you, Professor.

Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
4 posted 2002-01-03 04:15 PM


...Excellent Professor.....excellent...

~* A dream is a wish your heart makes... *~

Parker
Member Elite
since 2000-01-06
Posts 3129
ON
5 posted 2002-01-03 04:30 PM


Don't know this sonnet form.... but its so cool. Great write.

Parker

Hypnosis
Member
since 2001-12-02
Posts 325
CO
6 posted 2002-01-03 04:40 PM


Great thoughts and writing!  The poor are often overl;ooked in society, and we should be doing more to help them get off the streets.  Show them a real life.  Thank you Professor

    Randy Meador

a life lived unexplored is a life not worth living.

Mistletoe Angel
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Empyrean
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon
7 posted 2002-01-03 09:05 PM




(tears fall down my cheeks) Oh Aszard, this is soooooooo heartbreaking, I wish the more prosperous can lend a compassionate heart together to give all the people of the world a chance to live with health and comfort! (big hugggssssss) My heart goes out to all the needy, I join you in your prayers! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Aszard, thank you for sharing!



May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

Professor Gloom
Member Elite
since 2000-07-23
Posts 3082
of Depression
8 posted 2002-01-04 05:21 AM


Thank you, Serenity,
T’is a party I crash easily,
Besides pity is a emotion which should be replaced by
Concern.

Thank you, EllenMoran,
Part of the Style of a Gloom sonnet is those lines,
Which are the same or almost the same as each other.
This enables the pounding of the theme.
Glad you liked it.

Thank you, Sunshine,
Your words in response are always pleasing.

Thank you, Enchantress,
For taking the time to read and respond.

Thank you, Parker,
This is a form I devised to suit my style and tone,
Key to it is the two isolated lines, which stress the theme.

Thank you, Hypnosis,
Actually, they are the ones with the real lives,
We should be helping them into our dreams.

Thank you, Mistletoe Angel,
Unfortunately, the haves tend to hold too tightly to their things,
Stick to closely to their own ideas, and seldom even bother to look.
May we all pray for those of need.

Gloom

Kethry
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082
Victoria Australia
9 posted 2002-01-04 06:18 AM


Gloom,
A  sonnet to remember and use to redress wrongs.
Kethry

Here in the midst of my lonely abyss, a single joy I find...your presence in my mind.  Unknown



Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #18 » Misdirection : A Gloom Sonnet

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary