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Jamie
Member Elite

since 2000-06-26

Posts 3168
Blue Heaven

0 posted 2002-01-01 01:38 PM

The Smallest Butterfly

She makes herself small to hide

from what has become her life,

a butterfly among the sons of Anak.

Everything is so much bigger than she,

and the fears that burn within

become a wildfire spreading outward

and seek to ignite her

withering effete wings

and leave her flightless,

hiding among the smoke and ash

where she lies holding her breath.

On braver days she rises up,

only to discover

the more she explores

the smaller she gets,

until she finds herself curled up,

childlike,

beneath the nearest friendly tree.

I saw her sleeping in the rain

with a raft near at hand,

because she knows one day it will

never stop.

She waits for it to wash her away.

She stuggles daily to endure

the countless insidious doubts

that grab and pull at her quicksand life.

The drudgery has stolen her passion

and left her praying for strength to

just breathe.

Her stridulous scream

finds no ear to jar.

She uses companionship like cigarettes

to fill the malignant moments,

each one leaving her more addicted,

more breathless,

and more powerless than the last.

The harshest years have proven impossible

for her to reconcile.

I once heard her say an abhorrent past

sets in place an unhopeful future.

In time maybe she will decide her tomorrows

are best decided by what she wants,

not what she has already seen.

My greatest fear is of her finding

she might more easily stop the rain

hk>lk

There is society where none intrudes, by the deep sea, and music in its roar.
byron

[This message has been edited by Jamie (01-01-2002 01:40 PM).]

Lily B
Member

since 2000-03-31

Posts 91
Auburn, IN, US

1 posted 2002-01-01 01:52 PM

This is sad... because these little butterflies do exist.
It's hopeful as well, though, because people like you -- and like me -- notice them and feel compassion.

I liked this quite a bit. You told a story that flowed for me. It made sense. You used insightful (and beautiful) words/phrases.

Thanks for sharing this!
:)

~Julie~

Kit McCallum

Administrator

Member Laureate

since 2000-04-30

Posts 14774
Ontario, Canada

2 posted 2002-01-01 01:57 PM

"She uses companionship like cigarettes
to fill the malignant moments,
each one leaving her more addicted,
more breathless,
and more powerless than the last."

"My greatest fear is of her finding
she might more easily stop the rain"

Oh Jamie ... this is such a powerful piece! What an intense struggle you've captured here. An amazing and colourful journey ... truly an excellent write!

Best wishes,
/Kit

Startime
Member Ascendant

since 2000-10-03

Posts 5918
Canada

3 posted 2002-01-01 01:57 PM

*sigh* So delicate to have to endure life in a world that does not treat butterflies gently. This poem brought tears of compassion to my eyes for The Smallest Butterfly. Thank you for sharing such a tender poem. **hugs**

Love I leave with you whether it is in your life now or yet the essense of your dreams.

snowpants
Member Elite

since 2000-09-16

Posts 2061
KS

4 posted 2002-01-01 02:06 PM

'In time maybe she will decide her tomorrows

are best decided by what she wants,

not what she has already seen.

My greatest fear is of her finding

she might more easily stop the rain'

This is truly very well written...had me captivated right through to the end...great write!

sp

And did you know with the rain in your pockets,
you can change the weather...

Mistletoe Angel

Member Empyrean

since 2000-12-17

Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon

5 posted 2002-01-01 02:09 PM

(tears fall down my cheeks) Oh Jamie, this is so very sad, my heart cries out to this person and the struggle she is going through and hope she can find the hope and love and faith to be The Smallest Butterfly, flying with wings of joy! (kiss on cheek) Soooooo sad but beautiful, sweet friend, I cried reading this! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Jamie, thank you for sharing!

May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

VAS
Member Rara Avis

since 2000-11-16

Posts 7450
Oregon

6 posted 2002-01-01 02:19 PM

Fantastic piece! first of yours I've read and I'm so glad I cam in. I can relate, in part, to some of the fates of the smallest butterfly and I am certain I've have known many. Well done, Jamie!

Whether on the shoal or on the shore,
I'll seek the lighthouse evermore.

Lady Lost
Member

since 2000-07-13

Posts 470

7 posted 2002-01-01 02:23 PM

This poem is extremely powerful and thought provoking.. we are all held down I think by our past somewhat.. and how sad that some people are completely incapable of ever rising above... and how wonderful that there are people wise enough to recognize that pain in others to help lift them back up again!

Again, this is an amazing piece.

Write on!

~beth

"I woke you up and I slit the throat of your confidence, and we laughed in the night and I felt alright..." (3EB)

Victoria

Member Ascendant

since 2000-08-12

Posts 5869

8 posted 2002-01-01 02:27 PM

This piece captivated me...very touching indeed..

Happy New Year to you Jamie..

~Victoria~

"To love and be loved is to feel the sun from both sides."
~ David Viscott

Martie

Moderator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-09-21

Posts 28049
California

9 posted 2002-01-01 02:31 PM

Jamie--This is so metaphorically complete, with the most tender message of empathy and compassion. An amazingly right write!

Aimster
Member Elite

since 2000-02-19

Posts 4297
Charlotte, NC

10 posted 2002-01-01 03:49 PM

Jamie,

WOW...this has left me practially speechless.
Your words here touch the core of hearts and souls for everyone who reads your work! Just lovely work my dear friend, lovely!

Take care. Best wishes for the new year.

Hugs and KOTC
Amy

"Just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to, doesn't
mean they don't love you with all they have"

Midnitesun

Member Empyrean

since 2001-05-18

Posts 28647
Gaia

11 posted 2002-01-01 03:55 PM

I really enjoyed this perceptive gentle piece, full of imagery and metaphors. One to remember next time I see a butterfly.

Bill Charles
Member Patricius

since 2000-07-11

Posts 10619
highways, & byways, for now

12 posted 2002-01-01 04:23 PM

Jamie - a most wonderful writing. Very touching, and just great...

BC

Poet deVine

Administrator

Member Seraphic

since 1999-05-26

Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley

13 posted 2002-01-01 05:54 PM

You don't write often, but when you do..Pow! You have written such a wistful poem sir..your love of butterflies is commendable. And your words here speak volumes about that love. Let's hope the butterfly heeds your advice.

Jamie
Member Elite

since 2000-06-26

Posts 3168
Blue Heaven

14 posted 2002-01-01 10:05 PM

I appreciate all of the very nice replies. I am so glad that you not only liked it but also that the story was understood and the emotional content conveyed. This was one of the most difficult poems I have ever written. In my line of work I am normally in a position to be of at least some help to people, so it is especially hard to be useless to someone you really care about.

Again, thank you all very much, your support and kindness is appeciated.

There is society where none intrudes, by the deep sea, and music in its roar.
byron

ecrivan
Member Elite

since 2001-12-10

Posts 3923
my own state

15 posted 2002-01-02 12:46 PM

Jamie,

This is sad, because although small butterflies are beautiful, their lives are brief and if your "butterfly" is an addicted
smoker (that's what I understand here) than that is often hard on a relationship especially when health issues come up. My best to you for the holidays and may you have lots of joy this year and always.

Jamie
Member Elite

since 2000-06-26

Posts 3168
Blue Heaven

16 posted 2002-01-02 08:50 AM

ecrivan:- thanks for reading-
ps - i can see how you could think it is about smoking, but it is actually about struggling with fears, the past, the present, an uncertain future-- many specific details of daily living as well as life in general. -- sorry to have mislead you.
thanks again
:J

There is society where none intrudes, by the deep sea, and music in its roar.
byron

Janet Marie
Member Laureate

since 2000-01-22

Posts 18554

17 posted 2002-01-02 01:37 PM

Everything is so much bigger than she,

and the fears that burn within

become a wildfire spreading outward

and seek to ignite her

withering effete wings

and leave her flightless,

hiding among the smoke and ash

where she lies holding her breath.
================================
On braver days she rises up,

only to discover

the more she explores

the smaller she gets,
======================================
I saw her sleeping in the rain

with a raft near at hand,

because she knows one day it will

never stop.

She waits for it to wash her away.
=====================================

She uses companionship like cigarettes

to fill the malignant moments,

each one leaving her more addicted,

more breathless,

and more powerless than the last.
====================================
In time maybe she will decide her tomorrows

are best decided by what she wants,

not what she has already seen.

My greatest fear is of her finding

she might more easily stop the rain
=========================================

Well you had me from the title and you didnt even speak french

my oh my...so much to see here....
the imagery..the superb employ of metaphor(extended metaphor) the theme carried out to poetic perfection..the intensity of the emote
which was defined with the vivid imagery and the depth of the emotional purging.
excellent writing poet Jamie-sir...you have penned a beautiful bittersweet portrait and tribute to your "butterfly" ...
the lines I highlighted went thru me...you have penned a "moth anthem" and the mirrors are full of reflections that I cant deny.
You took your poetry to a higher level with this inspire.
jm

Irish Rose
Member Patricius

since 2000-04-06

Posts 10263

18 posted 2002-01-02 03:07 PM

In time maybe she will decide her tomorrows

are best decided by what she wants,

not what she has already seen.

My greatest fear is of her finding

she might more easily stop the rain"

It would be nearly impossible to choose a line that I enjoyed for I did every part of this poem. But these lines, particularily, struck me. I'm sure most read themselves in a poem and when they do, it becomes all that more special to them. This was for me.
The words in this poem are written from a very sensitive heart, I believe. I really liked this so much. It wasn't "sappy" you know? It felt real. That's refreshing.

'Fiction is the truth inside the lie.' ~Stephen King

Jamie
Member Elite

since 2000-06-26

Posts 3168
Blue Heaven

19 posted 2002-01-02 05:23 PM

jm-- well, you are a bit butterfly biased i suppose-- thanks for the wonderful reply.

Kathleen- Thank you for the wonderful compliment--I tried to give it my heart, but at the same time have it seem written as if from a distance.

There is society where none intrudes, by the deep sea, and music in its roar.
byron

serenity blaze
Member Empyrean

since 2000-02-02

Posts 27738

20 posted 2002-01-02 05:31 PM

I've a rotten memory, but I read somewhere (anybody feel free to jump in anytime here) that the beating wings of the smallest butterflies can alter wind direction and thus affect temperature changes halfway around the world.

And according to my beliefs, even intention of help IS help.

Thank you for this one!

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

21 posted 2002-01-02 05:36 PM

Jamie, this carries so much symbolism...you show that you are in touch with forces beyond your ken, but accept them, nevertheless...

fey ways smile...

catalinamoon

Member Rara Avis

since 2000-06-03

Posts 9543
The Shores of Alone

22 posted 2002-01-02 05:43 PM

This is stunning, Jamie.
Sandra

strbbux
Member Elite

since 2001-12-19

Posts 3859

23 posted 2002-01-02 07:42 PM

Oh Jamie, I love butterflies so, this brought tears. floria

Enchantress
Member Empyrean

since 2001-08-14

Posts 35113
Canada eh.

24 posted 2002-01-02 08:41 PM

...This has left me speechless...but, I wanted to say....incredible write!...

~* A dream is a wish your heart makes... *~

RosePetal

Member Elite

since 2001-08-26

Posts 2985
South Florida

25 posted 2002-01-02 08:59 PM

Hi, this is the first poem i've read from you. It is so sad and left me a bit speechless as well. Best Wishes...

happy new year

RP

Jamie
Member Elite

since 2000-06-26

Posts 3168
Blue Heaven

26 posted 2002-01-02 09:07 PM

I thank you all very much. Let us show all these butterflies how wonderful they really are.

There is society where none intrudes, by the deep sea, and music in its roar.
byron

Dark Angel
Member Patricius

since 1999-08-04

Posts 10095

27 posted 2002-01-03 02:58 AM

She uses companionship like cigarettes

to fill the malignant moments,

each one leaving her more addicted,

more breathless,

and more powerless than the last.

Wow Jamie, This is absolutely magnificent and to me, so perfectly said in such depth and complete awareness.

In time maybe she will decide her tomorrows

Indeed "the smallest butterfly" eventually must "decide her tomorrows" to be able to continue to flutter into them.

Beautifully written!

Great big hugs my friend

Maree

Gentle Spirit
Member Patricius

since 2000-10-09

Posts 13989

28 posted 2002-01-03 08:32 AM

When butterflies emerge, it is the greatest of things. Life....begins. This is a beautiful and touching write. *s*

On the wings of words our spirits fly....and our souls are free.
~Me~

(I could have missed the pain, but I'd have had to miss the dance~Garth)

Jamie
Member Elite

since 2000-06-26

Posts 3168
Blue Heaven

29 posted 2002-01-03 03:19 PM

(((Mmy)))

Thanks very much GS

There is society where none intrudes, by the deep sea, and music in its roar.
byron

[This message has been edited by Jamie (01-05-2002 12:01 AM).]

Severn
Member Rara Avis

since 1999-07-17

Posts 7704

30 posted 2002-05-29 01:02 AM

you know I love this J. I don't need to say anymore than that...and I know it means a lot..

[This message has been edited by Severn (05-29-2002 10:11 PM).]

Severn
Member Rara Avis

since 1999-07-17

Posts 7704

31 posted 2003-01-18 05:57 AM

Well. On my search for the Moment poem I also found this.

Read it properly for the first time I think, because I didn't want to read it before, do you know what I mean? Maybe not.

Think that line from shakespeare about the webs and deceiving and whatnot...

I never thanked you for it, for this hardest poem of yours.

So - months and months later, thank you. You do so much.

lk

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