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Passions in Poetry

The Smallest Butterfly

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Jamie
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since 06-26-2000
Posts 3219
Blue Heaven


0 posted 01-01-2002 01:38 PM       View Profile for Jamie   Email Jamie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions   Click to visit Jamie's Home Page   View IP for Jamie

The Smallest Butterfly



She makes herself small to hide

from what has become her life,

a butterfly among the sons of Anak.

Everything is so much bigger than she,

and the fears that burn within

become a wildfire spreading outward

and seek to ignite her

withering effete wings

and leave her flightless,

hiding among the smoke and ash

where she lies holding her breath.


On braver days she rises up,

only to discover

the more she explores

the smaller she gets,

until she finds herself curled up,

childlike,

beneath the nearest friendly tree.

I saw her sleeping in the rain

with a raft near at hand,

because she knows one day it will

never stop.

She waits for it to wash her away.


She stuggles daily to endure

the countless insidious doubts

that grab and pull at her quicksand life.

The drudgery has stolen her passion

and left her praying for strength to

just breathe.

Her stridulous scream

finds no ear to jar.

She uses companionship like cigarettes

to fill the malignant moments,

each one leaving her more addicted,

more breathless,

and more powerless than the last.


The harshest years have proven impossible

for her to reconcile.

I once heard her say an abhorrent past

sets in place an unhopeful future.

In time maybe she will decide her tomorrows

are best decided by what she wants,

not what she has already seen.

My greatest fear is of her finding

she might more easily stop the rain



hk>lk


There is society where none intrudes, by the deep sea, and music in its roar.
byron

[This message has been edited by Jamie (01-01-2002 01:40 PM).]

© Copyright 2002 Jamie Patterson - All Rights Reserved
Lily B
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since 03-31-2000
Posts 91
Auburn, IN, US


1 posted 01-01-2002 01:52 PM       View Profile for Lily B   Email Lily B   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Lily B's Home Page   View IP for Lily B

This is sad... because these little butterflies do exist.
It's hopeful as well, though, because people like you -- and like me -- notice them and feel compassion.

I liked this quite a bit. You told a story that flowed for me. It made sense. You used insightful (and beautiful) words/phrases.

Thanks for sharing this!
:)

~Julie~
Kit McCallum
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since 04-30-2000
Posts 16920
Ontario, Canada


2 posted 01-01-2002 01:57 PM       View Profile for Kit McCallum   Email Kit McCallum   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Kit McCallum

"She uses companionship like cigarettes
to fill the malignant moments,
each one leaving her more addicted,
more breathless,
and more powerless than the last."

"My greatest fear is of her finding
she might more easily stop the rain"

Oh Jamie ... this is such a powerful piece!  What an intense struggle you've captured here. An amazing and colourful journey ... truly an excellent write!

Best wishes,
/Kit
Startime
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since 10-03-2000
Posts 6143
Canada


3 posted 01-01-2002 01:57 PM       View Profile for Startime   Email Startime   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Startime's Home Page   View IP for Startime

*sigh* So delicate to have to endure life in a world that does not treat butterflies gently. This poem brought tears of compassion to my eyes for The Smallest Butterfly. Thank you for sharing such a tender poem. **hugs**

Love I leave with you whether it is in your life now or yet the essense of your dreams.

snowpants
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since 09-16-2000
Posts 2086
KS


4 posted 01-01-2002 02:06 PM       View Profile for snowpants   Email snowpants   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit snowpants's Home Page   View IP for snowpants

'In time maybe she will decide her tomorrows

are best decided by what she wants,

not what she has already seen.

My greatest fear is of her finding

she might more easily stop the rain'

This is truly very well written...had me captivated right through to the end...great write!

sp     

And did you know with the rain in your pockets,
you can change the weather...

Mistletoe Angel
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 Tours
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since 12-17-2000
Posts 34089
City of Roses


5 posted 01-01-2002 02:09 PM       View Profile for Mistletoe Angel   Email Mistletoe Angel   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Mistletoe Angel's Home Page   View IP for Mistletoe Angel



(tears fall down my cheeks) Oh Jamie, this is so very sad, my heart cries out to this person and the struggle she is going through and hope she can find the hope and love and faith to be The Smallest Butterfly, flying with wings of joy! (kiss on cheek) Soooooo sad but beautiful, sweet friend, I cried reading this! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Jamie, thank you for sharing!



May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton
VAS
Member Rara Avis
since 11-16-2000
Posts 7440
Oregon


6 posted 01-01-2002 02:19 PM       View Profile for VAS   Email VAS   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for VAS

Fantastic piece! first of yours I've read and I'm so glad I cam in. I can relate, in part, to some of the fates of the smallest butterfly and I am certain I've have known many.  Well done, Jamie!

Whether on the shoal or on the shore,
I'll seek the lighthouse evermore.

Lady Lost
Member
since 07-13-2000
Posts 476


7 posted 01-01-2002 02:23 PM       View Profile for Lady Lost   Email Lady Lost   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Lady Lost

This poem is extremely powerful and thought provoking.. we are all held down I think by our past somewhat.. and how sad that some people are completely incapable of ever rising above... and how wonderful that there are people wise enough to recognize that pain in others to help lift them back up again!

Again, this is an amazing piece.

Write on!

~beth

"I woke you up and I slit the throat of your confidence, and we laughed in the night and I felt alright..." (3EB)

Victoria
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since 08-12-2000
Posts 6020


8 posted 01-01-2002 02:27 PM       View Profile for Victoria   Email Victoria   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Victoria

This piece captivated me...very touching indeed.. Happy New Year to you Jamie..

             ~Victoria~

"To love and be loved is to feel the sun from both sides."
~ David Viscott


                                            

Martie
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since 09-21-1999
Posts 28608
California


9 posted 01-01-2002 02:31 PM       View Profile for Martie   Email Martie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Martie's Home Page   View IP for Martie

Jamie--This is so metaphorically complete, with the most tender message of empathy and compassion.  An amazingly right write!
Aimster
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since 02-19-2000
Posts 4367
Charlotte, NC


10 posted 01-01-2002 03:49 PM       View Profile for Aimster   Email Aimster   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Aimster

Jamie,

WOW...this has left me practially speechless.
Your words here touch the core of hearts and souls for everyone who reads your work! Just lovely work my dear friend, lovely!

Take care. Best wishes for the new year.

Hugs and KOTC
Amy

"Just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to, doesn't
mean they don't love you with all they have"

Midnitesun
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since 05-18-2001
Posts 29020
Gaia


11 posted 01-01-2002 03:55 PM       View Profile for Midnitesun   Email Midnitesun   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Midnitesun

I really enjoyed this perceptive gentle piece, full of imagery and metaphors. One to remember next time I see a butterfly.    
Bill Charles
Member Patricius
since 07-11-2000
Posts 11011
highways, & byways, for now


12 posted 01-01-2002 04:23 PM       View Profile for Bill Charles   Email Bill Charles   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Bill Charles

Jamie - a most wonderful writing. Very touching, and just great...

BC
Poet deVine
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since 05-26-99
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Hurricane Alley


13 posted 01-01-2002 05:54 PM       View Profile for Poet deVine   Email Poet deVine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Poet deVine

You don't write often, but when you do..Pow! You have written such a wistful poem sir..your love of butterflies is commendable. And your words here speak volumes about that love. Let's hope the butterfly heeds your advice.
Jamie
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since 06-26-2000
Posts 3219
Blue Heaven


14 posted 01-01-2002 10:05 PM       View Profile for Jamie   Email Jamie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Jamie's Home Page   View IP for Jamie

I appreciate all of the very nice replies. I am so glad that you not only liked it but also that the story was understood and the emotional content conveyed. This was one of the most difficult poems I have ever written. In my line of work I am normally in a position to be of at least some help to people, so it is especially hard to be useless to someone you really care about.

Again, thank you all very much, your support and kindness is appeciated.

There is society where none intrudes, by the deep sea, and music in its roar.
byron

ecrivan
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since 12-10-2001
Posts 3983
my own state


15 posted 01-02-2002 12:46 AM       View Profile for ecrivan   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit ecrivan's Home Page   View IP for ecrivan

Jamie,

This is sad, because although small butterflies are beautiful, their lives are brief and if your "butterfly" is an addicted
smoker (that's what I understand here) than that is often hard on a relationship especially when health issues come up. My best to you for the holidays and may you have lots of joy this year and always.

Jamie
Member Elite
since 06-26-2000
Posts 3219
Blue Heaven


16 posted 01-02-2002 08:50 AM       View Profile for Jamie   Email Jamie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Jamie's Home Page   View IP for Jamie

ecrivan:- thanks for reading-
ps - i can see how you could think it is about smoking, but it is actually about struggling with fears, the past, the present, an uncertain future-- many specific details of daily living as well as life in general. -- sorry to have mislead you.
thanks again
:J

There is society where none intrudes, by the deep sea, and music in its roar.
byron

Janet Marie
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since 01-22-2000
Posts 18986


17 posted 01-02-2002 01:37 PM       View Profile for Janet Marie   Email Janet Marie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Janet Marie

Everything is so much bigger than she,

and the fears that burn within

become a wildfire spreading outward

and seek to ignite her

withering effete wings

and leave her flightless,

hiding among the smoke and ash

where she lies holding her breath.
================================
On braver days she rises up,

only to discover

the more she explores

the smaller she gets,

======================================
I saw her sleeping in the rain

with a raft near at hand,

because she knows one day it will

never stop.

She waits for it to wash her away.
=====================================

She uses companionship like cigarettes

to fill the malignant moments,

each one leaving her more addicted,

more breathless,

and more powerless than the last.

====================================
In time maybe she will decide her tomorrows

are best decided by what she wants,

not what she has already seen.


My greatest fear is of her finding

she might more easily stop the rain
=========================================

Well you had me from the title and you didnt even speak french

my oh my...so much to see here....
the imagery..the superb employ of metaphor(extended metaphor) the theme carried out to poetic perfection..the intensity of the emote
which was defined with the vivid imagery and the depth of the emotional purging.
excellent writing poet Jamie-sir...you have penned a beautiful bittersweet portrait and tribute to your "butterfly" ...
the lines I highlighted went thru me...you have penned a "moth anthem" and the mirrors are full of reflections that I cant deny.
You took your poetry to a higher level with this inspire.
jm
Irish Rose
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since 04-06-2000
Posts 10553


18 posted 01-02-2002 03:07 PM       View Profile for Irish Rose   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Irish Rose

In time maybe she will decide her tomorrows

are best decided by what she wants,

not what she has already seen.

My greatest fear is of her finding

she might more easily stop the rain"

It would be nearly impossible to choose a line that I enjoyed for I did every part of this poem.  But these lines, particularily, struck me.  I'm sure most read themselves in a poem and when they do, it becomes all that more special to them.  This was for me.
The words in this poem are written from a very sensitive heart, I believe.  I really liked this so much.  It wasn't "sappy" you know?  It felt real.  That's refreshing.

'Fiction is the truth inside the lie.' ~Stephen King

Jamie
Member Elite
since 06-26-2000
Posts 3219
Blue Heaven


19 posted 01-02-2002 05:23 PM       View Profile for Jamie   Email Jamie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Jamie's Home Page   View IP for Jamie

jm-- well, you are a bit butterfly biased i suppose-- thanks for the wonderful reply.

Kathleen- Thank you for the wonderful compliment--I tried to give it my heart, but at the same time have it seem written as if from a distance.

There is society where none intrudes, by the deep sea, and music in its roar.
byron

serenity blaze
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since 02-02-2000
Posts 28839


20 posted 01-02-2002 05:31 PM       View Profile for serenity blaze   Email serenity blaze   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for serenity blaze

I've a rotten memory, but I read somewhere (anybody feel free to jump in anytime here) that the beating wings of the smallest butterflies can alter wind direction and thus affect temperature changes halfway around the world. And according to my beliefs, even intention of help IS help.

Thank you for this one!
Sunshine
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Member Caelestus
since 06-25-99
Posts 67715
Listening to every heart


21 posted 01-02-2002 05:36 PM       View Profile for Sunshine   Email Sunshine   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Sunshine's Home Page   View IP for Sunshine


Jamie, this carries so much symbolism...you show that you are in touch with forces beyond your ken, but accept them, nevertheless...

fey ways smile...
catalinamoon
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Member Rara Avis
since 06-03-2000
Posts 9897
The Shores of Alone


22 posted 01-02-2002 05:43 PM       View Profile for catalinamoon   Email catalinamoon   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit catalinamoon's Home Page   View IP for catalinamoon

This is stunning, Jamie.
Sandra
strbbux
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since 12-19-2001
Posts 3975


23 posted 01-02-2002 07:42 PM       View Profile for strbbux   Email strbbux   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for strbbux

Oh Jamie, I love butterflies so, this brought tears. floria
Enchantress
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since 08-14-2001
Posts 37801
Somewhere in time~


24 posted 01-02-2002 08:41 PM       View Profile for Enchantress   Email Enchantress   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Enchantress

...This has left me speechless...but, I wanted to say....incredible write!...

~* A dream is a wish your heart makes... *~

 
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