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Open Poetry #17
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Sunshine
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since 1999-06-25
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Listening to every heart

0 posted 2001-12-19 04:10 PM



~*~

Retrospection nods
You are there, here with me, when
Encircling all thought

~*~




© Copyright 2001 Karilea Rilling Jungel - All Rights Reserved
Mistletoe Angel
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Portland, Oregon
1 posted 2001-12-19 04:14 PM




BRAVO!!! What a beautiful senryu to fulfill her challenge! (smiles) Your words indeed encircle all our thoughts, sweet friend! (big hugggsssssss) BRAVO!!! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Karilea, thank you for sharing!



May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

Titia Geertman
Member Ascendant
since 2001-05-07
Posts 5182
Netherlands
2 posted 2001-12-19 04:57 PM



You are there.....posting this beautiful senryu
And I am here sweetie for you

Titia


A rose is a rose is a rose...I guess...
Want to use the pics on my website? Just send me a mail and I'll give you the link.

2dalimit
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since 2000-02-08
Posts 2228
Mississippi coast
3 posted 2001-12-19 05:37 PM


Very,very good.


Melton

Mysteria
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British Columbia, Canada
4 posted 2001-12-19 05:56 PM


yes!
Charisma
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lost in blue pages
5 posted 2001-12-19 06:08 PM


*WOW* this is STUNNING
enjoyed it thoroughly

Charisma

~*Theresia~*  

Marsha
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since 2000-07-10
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Maidstone Kent England
6 posted 2001-12-19 06:08 PM


Kari darling sister of my soul, YES wonderful, you have fufilled the challenge and then some. Wonderful darling girl utterly utterly wonderful

Love and warm stuff
As always
Mushy



Enchantress
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since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
7 posted 2001-12-19 06:12 PM


EXQUISITE!!!

"A dream is a wish your heart makes..."

LngJhnAg
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since 1999-07-23
Posts 3508
Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion
8 posted 2001-12-19 10:06 PM


I know this poem, because it speaks to me.
Sudhir Iyer
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since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium
9 posted 2001-12-20 05:13 AM


...lovely writing...

when I walk around
you are there, here with me in
these nostalgic thoughts

...see you never fail to inspire me...

...thanks for that...

~regards~
sudhir

SEA
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with you
10 posted 2001-12-20 08:54 AM


ooooo, this is a great spin on the challenge
Nan
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since 1999-05-20
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Cape Cod Massachusetts USA
11 posted 2001-12-20 09:19 AM


Mirrored reflection
You are there, here with me viewed
From within oneself

Allan Riverwood
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Winnipeg
12 posted 2001-12-20 04:10 PM


Sunshine...

Pleasing senryu you have here...  

I'd have to say however, that it's not up to your usual potential, the second line of it is a bit stammered... you use two commas in the single line, and the last word seems like it was tacked on to add that extra syllable.  I don't like that very much.

Otherwise, a decent senryu.  Just didn't hit me like most of yours do, and that was probably because of the second line.

Don't let me discourage you.     Keep sharing.

~Allan

Kethry
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082
Victoria Australia
13 posted 2001-12-21 02:45 AM


Kari,
Lady will be so pleased.
Keth

Here in the midst of my lonely abyss, a single joy I find...your presence in my mind.  Unknown



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