How to Join Member's Area Private Library Search Today's Topics p Login
Main Forums Discussion Tech Talk Mature Content Archives
   Nav Win
 Archives
 Open Poetry #17 Archive
 Diadems
 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
Follow us on Facebook

 This is an Archive. You may post a reply, but new topics are not allowed.

 
User Options
Format for Better Printing EMail to a Friend Create a Greeting Card with this Poem
Admin Print Send ECard
Passions in Poetry

Diadems (revised)

 Post A Reply   Go to the Next Oldest/Previous Topic Return to Topic Page Go to the Next Newest Topic 
Sudhir Iyer
Member Rara Avis
since 04-26-2000
Posts 7206
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium


0 posted 12-19-2001 03:58 AM       View Profile for Sudhir Iyer   Email Sudhir Iyer   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions  View IP for Sudhir Iyer

my heart is angst, ridden --
a home for juvenile delinquent
dressed in stolen moments
of the past times spent
not so long while back

oh! then I wore a crown of
love

ah! that L word again
wondering if there is a copyright
and a time-constraint
for using that word and maybe
that's why the crown was lost
in those stolen moments

yesterday is caught up
in an image of a rose,
that once was painted -
coloured on sacred petals
with sliding drops of dew

ah! a fool I've been
to live those dreams
where I was king
and ...

now I begin to understand
the heart of the matter
when the nucleus pulled
more than it should have -
and in an uncontrollable fission,
a chain reaction,
that ended when a bomb dropped
causing an explosion
on the stem of the red
flower

ahhhhh! the colour was of blood
covered by the drops of
sad foggy eyes
held by thorns
and I was wearing
that crown ...
(of sharp silence)

what a fool, I've been
to be misled by sweet joy
like saccharine
instead of sugar

timelessness
seems to be built upon
that time machine
where the only step one
can take is backwards
and relive the pain,
but change nothing

"oh boy, there you have your share
now get back to your
corner
and count till five-hundred million
before asking for another bite at
this cake"

and I think I should be
feeling satisfied
for now...
because if I live long enough,
there is still
hope

after all,
all that I've to do is count
till five-hundred million
to wear another
diadem

but, there is always
hope

...........

I had first posted this in Teen#5... and with the help of great comments from Allan... I revised the poem...

thanks for coming by...
© Copyright 2001 Sudhir Iyer - All Rights Reserved
Kethry
Member Rara Avis
since 07-29-2000
Posts 9235
Victoria Australia


1 posted 12-19-2001 06:40 AM       View Profile for Kethry   Email Kethry   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Kethry

Sudhir,
you are the crown jewel when you write like this. **HuGS**
Keth.

Here in the midst of my lonely abyss, a single joy I find...your presence in my mind.  Unknown


Irish Rose
Member Patricius
since 04-06-2000
Posts 10553


2 posted 12-19-2001 11:59 AM       View Profile for Irish Rose   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Irish Rose

outstanding poetry, Sudhir, and I mean that!

Kathleen (Kay)
"When red-haired girls scamper like roses over the rain-green grass, and the sun drips honey."
Laurie Lee

Midnitesun
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 05-18-2001
Posts 29020
Gaia


3 posted 12-19-2001 12:14 PM       View Profile for Midnitesun   Email Midnitesun   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Midnitesun

This is wonderful, the imagery is unique. I love the way your angst pours forth, like the emptying of a fine glass of wine, yet hopeful for a refill.
serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 02-02-2000
Posts 28839


4 posted 12-19-2001 12:28 PM       View Profile for serenity blaze   Email serenity blaze   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for serenity blaze

sudhir, this is wonderful writing (and Allan is a gem, is he not?) I love the world as glimpsed through your eyes!
Sudhir Iyer
Member Rara Avis
since 04-26-2000
Posts 7206
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium


5 posted 12-20-2001 03:46 AM       View Profile for Sudhir Iyer   Email Sudhir Iyer   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Sudhir Iyer

thank you all very much, most sincerely...

Regards to all,
sudhir
Glenn Logan
Member
since 10-10-2001
Posts 121
Virginia


6 posted 12-20-2001 10:22 AM       View Profile for Glenn Logan   Email Glenn Logan   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit Glenn Logan's Home Page   View IP for Glenn Logan

Quite a few interesting concepts here.  I hope you can resist the pressures to make your verse conform with the popular trite standards of rhyme and meter, and can continue to develop your own voice.

Best wishes,


Glenn Logan
Opeth
Member Elite
since 12-13-2001
Posts 2224
The Ravines


7 posted 12-20-2001 10:32 AM       View Profile for Opeth   Email Opeth   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Opeth

I enjoyed the concept implied.
Sudhir Iyer
Member Rara Avis
since 04-26-2000
Posts 7206
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium


8 posted 01-28-2002 03:23 AM       View Profile for Sudhir Iyer   Email Sudhir Iyer   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Sudhir Iyer

Thanks a lot, my friends...

Regards,
Sudhir
RosePetal
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 08-26-2001
Posts 3414
South Florida


9 posted 02-11-2002 03:51 PM       View Profile for RosePetal   Email RosePetal   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for RosePetal

enjoyed this thoroughly sir
Sudhir Iyer
Member Rara Avis
since 04-26-2000
Posts 7206
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium


10 posted 02-12-2002 07:37 AM       View Profile for Sudhir Iyer   Email Sudhir Iyer   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Sudhir Iyer

Thanks a lot, my friend

Regards,
Sudhir
 
 Post A Reply   Go to the Next Oldest/Previous Topic Return to Topic Page Go to the Next Newest Topic 
All times are ET (US) Top
  User Options
>> Archives >> Open Poetry #17 >> Diadems Format for Better Printing EMail to a Friend Create a Greeting Card with this Poem
Print Send ECard

 

pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Today's Topics | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary



© Passions in Poetry and netpoets.com 1998-2013
All Poetry and Prose is copyrighted by the individual authors