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Open Poetry #17
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Daemonyin
Junior Member
since 2001-11-24
Posts 31


0 posted 2001-12-15 01:46 AM


There's a destiny chosen by the stars
dead inevitable, I must overcome.
Life's predictable when I'm lazy;
Humor the day, fade to gray, then I'm numb

Oh, what is the consequence of defying you Destiny?
When I get there I'll take it in strides.

As of now....

I have yet to come through
with my hopeful, strectched lies
born from intentions to quench my soul

Destiny's directing me
I can't escape -I'm weak-
this lonely gray vicinity.
Prosaic sector;
Devoid of musical entity.
Like an unwaning cancer;
The source of my soul's atrophy.

And so alas, it is my "fate",
being chained below
I'm struggling to rise...
Middle ground is as far as I can go.

Though not as far as I can see.
You'd think I'd strive as long as I have sight.

But all light has vanished
from tall cavern's eye.
And I have not the strength
or will required to climb.
....Okay, so this poem is obviously not about a delicious bagel....  I admit, I led you here under false pretenses.  If you wish to provide me with a vengeful beating, I will permit it.....    

© Copyright 2001 Dade - All Rights Reserved
SEA
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 Tours
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676
with you
1 posted 2001-12-15 02:35 AM


now you went and made me hungry....LOL
I'll forgive you the title this once  

I enjoyed the write   very well done  

Midnitesun
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647
Gaia
2 posted 2001-12-15 03:25 AM


Very, very interesting. Playful false pretenses prove fantasy exists. HUH?
How did you know I bought bagels today?
I enjoyed this most unusual poem, especially this:
"And so alas, it is my "fate",
being chained below
I'm struggling to rise...
Middle ground is as far as I can go"

Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley
3 posted 2001-12-15 04:52 PM


Interesting poem..but why the lure with the false title? Do you think a catchy title is essential to draw a reader's eye? If you had to rename this piece, what would you call it?

Mistletoe Angel
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Empyrean
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon
4 posted 2001-12-15 04:58 PM




(giggles) OK, I will let you go on the title this once! (smiles) Such a wonderful poem about destiny and how fate is the challenge that we confront to fulfill it! (big hugggsssss) We all love you so much, sweet friend, I love it!!! You have such a beautiful heart, sweet friend, thank you for sharing!



May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

Daemonyin
Junior Member
since 2001-11-24
Posts 31

5 posted 2001-12-15 10:24 PM


To Poet deVine:  I simply didn't feel like being serious, I was going to call it "fade to gray" or something like that... Its just that I don't consider titles to be of that much importance, and because the poems that I write never at all stray from "serious", I like to put something silly or stupid for  the title.....

Thankyou SEA,  
Thanks Midnitesun
And Noah Eaton, I had no idea I was so loved, thanks for filling me in....  Ah, but you say that to everyone don't you?

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