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Open Poetry #17
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Corinne
Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167
state of confusion

0 posted 2001-12-03 11:10 PM


My creations are childlike
in contrast to your artistry;
your textured introspection
weaves a tightly knit bond
around this loose mind,
and
spills like worm silk
into these unskilled hands;
still,
I can almost discern
the sharp intake
of breath
as it forms a border
between us,
my limning –
feeble in the wake
of your needle’s acumen,
as always,
your retort
belittles
me.

© 2001 Corinne Bailey

[This message has been edited by Corinne (edited 12-04-2001).]

© Copyright 2001 Corinne - All Rights Reserved
Martie
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since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
1 posted 2001-12-03 11:20 PM


Corinne--You always hit home with your poetry...straight to the truth...thanks for that.  
doreen peri
Member Elite
since 1999-05-25
Posts 3812
Virginia
2 posted 2001-12-03 11:28 PM


i can't imagine in my wildest dreams who's artistry would be superior to yours and who would respond to you with chit

well written verse here, corinne....

your skill with the english language is unsurpassed on these forums

Midnitesun
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since 2001-05-18
Posts 28647
Gaia
3 posted 2001-12-03 11:33 PM


???? They must have had another Corinne in mind, not the lady I've read.  
RosePetal
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since 2001-08-26
Posts 2985
South Florida
4 posted 2001-12-03 11:43 PM


Hey sweetie,

Don't let no one poo on you, you are talented and smart and don't let no one tell you different! (hugs)

RP

[This message has been edited by RosePetal (edited 12-03-2001).]

Mistletoe Angel
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Portland, Oregon
5 posted 2001-12-03 11:44 PM




(giggles with delight) Oh Corrine, your poetry always is expressed so wonderfully, your wisdom and heart always is shared in such a fabulous way! (smiles) This view on greed and the response to it is no exception! I love you, sweet friend! (kiss on cheek) You have such a beautiful heart, sweet Corrine, thank you for sharing!

May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

Corinne
Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167
state of confusion
6 posted 2001-12-04 11:44 AM


Thank you all for your kind responses (special thanks to Doreen!).

This morning after re-reading this, I don't like the title or using the word "poop" in context with the rest of the language of the poem. Think I'll think on this a bit.

Thanks again!

Cor

Parker
Member Elite
since 2000-01-06
Posts 3129
ON
7 posted 2001-12-04 04:03 PM


I can't see how anybody could belittle your  poetry. There is more intelligence in your work then I've seen in most.
Its a shame that some intellectual people are so self obsorbed, and belittling to others.

Now if i'm getting this message all wrong, Please excuse my ramblings, and its a great write.  

Park


Startime
Member Ascendant
since 2000-10-03
Posts 5918
Canada
8 posted 2001-12-04 04:12 PM


Never accept belittling from anyone. Your work is of the highest quality and is worthy of respect from all who read it. You always touch our hearts and feelings and to me that is what makes poetry great. Very well written again, dear one. **hugs**

Love I leave with you whether it is in your life now or yet the essense of your dreams.

Martie
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since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
9 posted 2001-12-04 04:19 PM


Back again, Corinne.  After reading my response above, I hope that you don't think that I was agreeing with the individual in your poem...far from it.  I was only saying that you say how you feel in a very truthful way...and very well. Your poetry is always a delight!!
Logan
Senior Member
since 2001-05-28
Posts 1641
Arkansas
10 posted 2001-12-04 04:22 PM


Ahh, now, Cor hon, I always felt that one belittles, when they know they will never come close, or surpass the ones they do that too. And, very gentle smile, they will have to walk many a mile to catch up to you, gentle one
Corinne
Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167
state of confusion
11 posted 2001-12-05 04:43 PM


Thank you all for your kind words.

Corinne

Nature Girl
Junior Member
since 2001-10-19
Posts 31

12 posted 2001-12-05 06:24 PM


Oh wow. This strikes me straight through. Corinne, you have a such a talent! Everything you write gives the reader such clarity, and sometimes that's not such a pleasant thing.

This somehow soothes me, the way it does when anything I feel is formed perfectly into words; as if having it in that tangible form makes it real, valid... justified. Thank you for this; the understanding was quite needed.

Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648

13 posted 2001-12-05 07:49 PM


Fantastic expression, Corinne! Smooth as silk! You're definitely one of the better poets that I've read! Don't let anyone make you feel inferior because you're not.
Sven
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Member Laureate
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937
East Lansing, MI USA
14 posted 2001-12-05 09:33 PM


to be a poet. . . one must understand. . .

you, my friend, understand. . .

I really like this, your use of the language here is well done, and the flow of it is great. . .

----------------------------------------------------

To the world, you may only be one person. But to one person, you may be the world.

Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
15 posted 2001-12-05 09:41 PM


Beautiful write here Corrine!
~hugs, Nancy~

"A dream is a wish your heart makes..."

Corinne
Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167
state of confusion
16 posted 2001-12-05 10:23 PM


Thank you kindly, Nature Girl, Denise, Sven and Enchantress!

Cor

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