forgotten promises and broken lies

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desperado
Member

since 1999-05-24

Posts 312
FT Hood,Tx

0 posted 2001-11-04 04:31 PM

forever tomorrow and next week for sure
yesterday will pass away cause nothing here is pure
smile once and wink again to pass the night away
shadow hides just as long the day is held at bay
never love never fear never reach the edge
turn around, walk away, your feet are on the ledge
you never hear my whispers
that pass beyond your ears
you never see the pain inside
and all those crystal tears
if only you could understand
my world has gone away
see my dreams, know my mind
you'll find it hard to stay
and all this pain is what I brought
upon myself through pain
it's all the same in the end
cause who will know my name
I wanted to be remembered
I wanted to be known
people, places, friends and more
the pain of life unchanging shown
though stretching and folding
and comming apart
destructive productive
and nowhere to start
my world is going backwards
on a path that I have made
tomorrow today all will fade away
in the end, even I close my day

People demand freedom of speech to make up for the freedom of thought which they avoid. --Soren Kierkegaard

doreen peri
Member Elite

since 1999-05-25

Posts 3812
Virginia

1 posted 2001-11-04 04:53 PM

quote:
my world is going backwards
on a path that I have made

desperado, you better come to your senses..... hehe

this, my friend is a song... everything i've read by you lately is a song.... matter of fact... YOU are a song.... a rhyming lyric rhythmed in your heartbeat....

i loved this writing..... you are good, my friend... better than good.....

a hard one to read for me... i identified with all this......

Magnus

Member Laureate

since 2001-10-10

Posts 14135
South Carolina, USA

2 posted 2001-11-04 05:51 PM

WEll done Desperado....how's the weather
in Tejas?

Skyfire

Member Elite

since 2000-12-27

Posts 3381
Riding

3 posted 2001-11-04 05:52 PM

I really like this one... only one thing that made it hard for me to read; the first part (stanza?) was rather rough in the flow of it... you seemed to get really into the rythm by the seventh line. It's a good read though! Thanks for sharing!

Startime
Member Ascendant

since 2000-10-03

Posts 5918
Canada

4 posted 2001-11-04 07:50 PM

WOW!!!So very true.. we all make our own paths and make our own choices. Very well said.

Love I leave with you whether it is in your life now or yet the essense of your dreams.

Tracey
Member Elite

since 2001-08-29

Posts 2808
where insanity meets breeding

5 posted 2001-11-04 10:57 PM

Soul searching subject, very well written. Loved the flow of it.

never love never fear never reach the edge
turn around, walk away, your feet are on the ledge

To never love, never reach the edge would be sad indeed. For there is much joy in life found there.

If she who dies with the most toys wins, then can I have some toy boys please?

Midnitesun

Member Empyrean

since 2001-05-18

Posts 28647
Gaia

6 posted 2001-11-04 11:22 PM

YES!! I'd like to hear a guitar behind this one. A little awkward in the beginning, but once the flow and rhythm got going, it carried me all the way to the end beautifully. BRAVO!

Aimster
Member Elite

since 2000-02-19

Posts 4297
Charlotte, NC

7 posted 2001-11-04 11:40 PM

this was excellent...the emotions
in this are very powerful...desperado
you've outdone yourself. your work
as always is amazing.

take care.
amy

"I could kiss you in
the rain forever.
Turn all of your pain to pleasure
Fill up your days with
sunlight, make the
passion last every night"

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