navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #15 » Beneath My Feet
Open Poetry #15
Post A Reply Post New Topic Beneath My Feet Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
1slick_lady
Member Ascendant
since 2000-12-22
Posts 6088
standing on a shadow's lace

0 posted 2001-09-09 09:45 PM



Beneath My Feet

you pull at my heart

with your magnet of recklessness

and for want of a proper name

you call it love

I stand on a thin ledge

between love and hate

stretching to reach the peak

then pushed back by your shove

another chapter in this series

of one more lonely night

lost alone together in you

blindly roaming in the echoes

of my life's empty chambers

gnawing on my own soul

while shaking fettered chains

I am not lost

I know where I am

slipping between joy and destruction

wishing my heart and my head

could find common ground

but each time I climb that hill

I slip on wet grass again

from tears beneath my feet


"...the rest is silence" (Hamlet)  Shakespeare


[This message has been edited by 1slick_lady (edited 09-10-2001).]

© Copyright 2001 Helen Chambers - All Rights Reserved
serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

1 posted 2001-09-09 11:17 PM


"lost alone together in you"

So much I could say about this one, but suffice to say I relate--and the above line said it all for me.

SEA
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 Tours
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676
with you
2 posted 2001-09-10 10:39 AM


wow, this is great.....

MyEnchanted_Melody
Senior Member
since 2001-05-30
Posts 1106
across the land of dreams. In your heart, I'd always be.
3 posted 2001-09-10 12:57 PM




I am not lost
I know where I am
sliding between joy and destruction

------------------
You are not lost...
and soon you will find
your ground to be.


Such a powerful heartfelt write.....

Thank you
****************************

"Oh...me!Oh Life!
Of the questions of these recurring..........
Of myself forever reproaching myself,
for who more foolish than I......"
~Whitman~

mirror man
Senior Member
since 2001-01-08
Posts 814

4 posted 2001-09-10 01:22 PM


Interesting imagery, form.  Very good.
Sven
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937
East Lansing, MI USA
5 posted 2001-09-10 07:20 PM


superbly done. . .

a heart in need. . . feet that can't find the ground. . .

---------------------------------------------------------

To the world, you may only be one person. But to one person, you may be the world.

Mysteria
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328
British Columbia, Canada
6 posted 2001-09-11 02:09 AM


Extremely well written poem, and one I am sure many can relate to, I know I could!

*~If you can't say anything nice about someone, don't say anything at all*~
~* My Gramma, Mom and me *~

rwood
Member Elite
since 2000-02-29
Posts 3793
Tennessee
7 posted 2001-09-11 07:38 AM


Wow! This one slips and slides in the reality of heart and mind. The battle between the two. Enjoyed this so much!

Sincerely,
Regina

Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #15 » Beneath My Feet

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary