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Open Poetry #15
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Elizabeth Santos
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269
Pennsylvania

0 posted 2001-08-26 10:39 AM



The Candle

A candle casts a flickering light
Upon my empty page of white
A lonely trembling paper stage
Where phantoms dance across the page

My eyes are drawn, not to the flame
But images within a frame
Of shadow dancing silhouettes,
Small figurines in pirouettes

As long as candle wick will last
The wavering flame will kindly cast
These ballet ghosts as they rehearse
On stage intended for a verse

To silent music shadows prance
To silent dreams the spirits dance
In quivering light of candle’s glow
They spin and waver to and fro

I have become but one of them
A twisting figure with a pen
A lonely heart in midnight moon
Twirling to a silent tune

My eye in hypnotizing stare
At dancing feet that aren’t there
Enchanted with the swirling caper
Staged upon my sheet of paper

A tragic figure I must be
To think these shadows part of me
My own dilusions place the blame
On dancing glimmers of a flame

It’s but a dreamer’s vivid mind
Imagination’s stewing brine
That stirs the melting taper’s tears
Into a dance that now appears

When fire consumed the waxy wick
The phantoms of the candlestick
Vanished into midnight’s dark
Til dawning sound of meadow lark

In early glow of rising sun
I saw what dancing flames had done
In every spot a foot was placed
A ballerina’s slipper traced
Her swirling marks across the stage
And etched this poem upon my page

Elizabeth Santos


[This message has been edited by Elizabeth Santos (edited 08-26-2001).]

© Copyright 2001 Elizabeth Santos - All Rights Reserved
Rex Allen McCoy
Member Elite
since 2000-01-30
Posts 2863
Sippin a Timmy's in London
1 posted 2001-08-26 10:48 AM


Good lord Elizabeth ... I love this poem
What a wonderful treasure

Rex

Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla
2 posted 2001-08-26 10:56 AM


Elizabeth,
An epopee if I ever saw one. One of your best
Sy

Sven
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Member Laureate
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937
East Lansing, MI USA
3 posted 2001-08-26 11:14 AM


I must concur with Sy my friend. . . this is truly wonderful. . .  

-----------------------------------------------------------

To the world, you may only be one person. But to one person, you may be the world.

Charisma
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Member Ascendant
since 2000-09-30
Posts 5906
lost in blue pages
4 posted 2001-08-26 11:18 AM


Oh my what a fabulous piece.....excellent!!

Charisma

Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648

5 posted 2001-08-26 02:11 PM


You have a remarkable imagination, Elizabeth. You have once again displayed it brilliantly upon that paper! Very well done!
Mysteria
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Member Laureate
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328
British Columbia, Canada
6 posted 2001-08-26 04:15 PM


Oh my! I had a favorite and now can you have two?  This is absolutely wonderful in its imagery and idea!  I do "hand puppets" on the wall by candleligth with Tori, and sometimes that saddens me yanno, a bittersweet time that only makes me wish I had someone "bigger" to share moments with in silence by candlelight.  Sorry, rambling, but your poetry always gets my wheels turning.

~*If you can't say anything nice about someone, don't say anything at all*~ hmmm...they were smart whomever said that!

Elizabeth Santos
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269
Pennsylvania
7 posted 2001-08-26 07:01 PM


Rex, Thanks, I'm so glad you liked it

Sy, Your words always mean so much to me
Thank you

Sven, From your pen, a ditto is highly regarded. Thank you

Charisma, Thank you, dear

Denise. I never had an imagination until I started writing verses. This keyboard makes up the words and i just do the typing.
THanks, sweet poetess

Mysteria, I think any poem about candlelight would be to your liking. Thank you for your wonderful compliments. I appreciate your comments

Liz

Marge Tindal
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since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores
8 posted 2001-08-26 09:38 PM


Elizabeth~
You glow so brightly within the dance of candle's flame~

'I have become but one of them
A twisting figure with a pen
A lonely heart in midnight moon
Twirling to a silent tune'


This is delicately lovely verse~
So YOU !
*Hugs*
~*Marge*~

~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
                                   noles1@totcon.com            

Moon Dust
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Member Elite
since 1999-06-11
Posts 2177
Skelmersdale, UK
9 posted 2001-08-26 10:15 PM


Elizabeth, you should be famous, you really should.

You don't have a choice to die but you do have a choice how you meet it.


ramrog
Member
since 2001-08-22
Posts 50

10 posted 2001-08-27 01:37 AM


It?s but a dreamer?s vivid mind
Imagination?s stewing brine
That stirs the melting taper?s tears
Into a dance that now appears


Awesome imagery.  loved it.

Masked Intruder
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Moderator
Senior Member
since 1999-05-23
Posts 1231
Near golden sunsets
11 posted 2001-08-28 10:40 PM


What I said about the last poem I commented on...it was meant for this one.  No offense to the last author.

Your imagery and metaphor are spectacular, it really pulled me in and swept me along without me minding the rhyming that I abhor so much. Kudos!

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
12 posted 2001-08-28 10:44 PM



This is the one I wish I had been able to pen....


Saunni
Senior Member
since 2000-07-11
Posts 1777
West Virginia
13 posted 2001-08-28 11:18 PM


Beyond cool! Indeed a GREAT one!  

Sauni @~~~>~~

The Sun Shines
Not On Us, But In Us
The River Flows Not Past,
But Through Us

Paula Finn
Member Ascendant
since 2000-06-17
Posts 5546
missouri
14 posted 2001-08-29 12:05 PM


Lady this is splendid...thank you
RSWells
Member Elite
since 2001-06-17
Posts 2533

15 posted 2001-08-29 12:10 PM


A dance of delight, a glance at a mighty write, a fantasy by candlelight. Enjoyed.
ethome
Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858
New Brunswick Canada
16 posted 2001-08-29 08:09 AM


Wow! What a beautiful poem Elizabeth! I have been away and busy working and not been able to read any of your heart felt poems lately. I' m sure gald I caught this one ....it's beautiful!!   As usual I might add!
illusion
Member
since 2001-06-19
Posts 296

17 posted 2001-08-29 09:21 AM


This is incredibly beautiful - I enjoyed every word.  
vandana
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Patricius
since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463
USA
18 posted 2001-08-29 11:16 AM


enjoyed
Elizabeth Santos
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269
Pennsylvania
19 posted 2001-08-30 07:34 AM


Thank you all so very much for your gracious remarks.
Your words mean so much
Liz

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