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Open Poetry #15

Time Unkind

MoonShadow
Senior Member

since 2001-08-02

Posts 943
Dark side of the Moon.

0 posted 2001-08-17 05:09 AM

    "Time, Unkind"

September bold,
    that brings such cold,
        follows youth when summer's old.

The snows on roofs,
    reflect the proofs,
        of winter's pale, gray face aloof.

The march of time,
    has been unkind,
        to both the body and the mind.

Illusive goal,
    embers of coal,
        reveal the truth within the soul.

The long in tooth,
    no longer youth,
        hold deep inside the hidden truth.

That time, nor place,
   can 'ere erase,
      the warmth in souls that come from grace.

Marge Tindal

Member Empyrean

since 1999-11-06

Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores

1 posted 2001-08-17 05:17 AM

MoonShadow~
I enjoy the cadence in your rhyme~
Nicely done~
~*Marge*~

~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com

MoonShadow
Senior Member

since 2001-08-02

Posts 943
Dark side of the Moon.

2 posted 2001-08-17 05:24 AM

Thanks Marge.... like the endless ticking of a clock... like time itself... the cadence marches on... "endless sands through the hourglass.. so are the days of our lives". The twilight of life... the entrance to winter. Thanks again for the comments.

tracie66
Member Elite

since 2000-01-18

Posts 4713
Australia

3 posted 2001-08-17 08:18 AM

Wonderful write, flowed beautifully...well done
~HUGS~ Tracie

Love is the life of the soul...
It is the harmony of the universe

nakdthoughts
Member Laureate

since 2000-10-29

Posts 19200
Between the Lines

4 posted 2001-08-17 08:33 AM

I love how time marches on..although yes, it can be unkind..loved the rhythm here

~Wynter

"The worst prison would be a closed heart".
...Pope John Paul II

Duncan
Member Ascendant

since 2001-08-07

Posts 5455

5 posted 2001-08-17 11:53 PM

Very cool write. The rhyme seemed effortless and natural, something I find very difficult to do.

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