Past and Still Present - pipTalk Forums

How to Join	Member's Area	Private Library	Search	Sanctuary		Login
Main Forums	Discussion	Tech Talk	Mature Content	Archives	A home without a wall, Our haven without ends, A circle we all call Our Family of Friends!

catalinamoon

Member Rara Avis

since 2000-06-03

Posts 9543
The Shores of Alone

0 posted 2001-08-16 07:38 PM

So long it seems since we've been two
when arms of steel were my defense
yet still my heart cries out to you
I cannot find my recompense.

Your touch has branded me insane
since your goodbyes there's nothing left
my soul misunderstands the game
I stand alone-complete bereft.

You are my past-but still you live
within me, there appears no hope
You are the one to which I give
my heart is yours in fullest scope.

I miss you so, some days the pain
near drowns me in its' reddish stain.

I took a walk around the world to ease my troubled mind. I left my body lying somewhere in the sands of time (3 Doors Down)

Janet Marie
Member Laureate

since 2000-01-22

Posts 18554

1 posted 2001-08-16 07:59 PM

So long it seems since we've been two
when arms of steel were my defense
yet still my heart cries out to you
I cannot find my recompense.

Your touch has branded me insane
since your goodbyes there's nothing left
my soul misunderstands the game
I stand alone-complete bereft.
========================

Oh this is excellent...
the vocabulary, the poetic phrases,
the rhyme divine and the ache that rises off the page...
and that closing summation couplet is pure poetry!!
Sandra your writing in the last several months has shown such growth and inspire...
very well done poetess moon

Feels like Im dancin with truth and wisdom
Precious rhythm you are my guide
These days are sacred, my heart is humble
Oh warrior show me thy light

WRBreezin
Member

since 2001-08-04

Posts 212

2 posted 2001-08-16 08:02 PM

Sandra, A pleasure to read you, once again the scarlet passion pours.

Willie

MyEnchanted_Melody
Senior Member

since 2001-05-30

Posts 1106
across the land of dreams. In your heart, I'd always be.

3 posted 2001-08-16 08:14 PM

So much pain......so much longing.......
My heart ached as I read this.....

An excellent write........

Thank you
**************************

"Oh...me!Oh Life!
Of the questions of these recurring..........
Of myself forever reproaching myself,
for who more foolish than I......"
~Whitman~

Marge Tindal

Member Empyrean

since 1999-11-06

Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores

4 posted 2001-08-17 05:15 AM

Catalinaoon~
Very sad ... but you pen it well.
*Hugs*
~*Marge*~

~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com

Kit McCallum

Administrator

Member Laureate

since 2000-04-30

Posts 14774
Ontario, Canada

5 posted 2001-08-17 06:36 AM

Very beautiful phrasing amongst the sorrow penned Sandra, wonderful cadence and rhyme, much enjoyed!

Best wishes,
/Kit

athena4
Senior Member

since 2000-12-10

Posts 622

6 posted 2001-08-17 04:56 PM

Sandra,
"Your touch has branded me insane". How perfectly and descriptively accurate...
Love, Elise

JamesMichael
Member Empyrean

since 1999-11-16

Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA

7 posted 2001-08-17 04:59 PM

Yes it is hard to miss someone...James

catalinamoon

Member Rara Avis

since 2000-06-03

Posts 9543
The Shores of Alone

8 posted 2001-08-17 05:08 PM

Thank you everyone. It sure is hard to let go.I appreciate the compliments on my writing Janet,and the appreciation and understanding of the rest.
Sandra

Cpat Hair

Member Patricius

since 2001-06-05

Posts 11793

9 posted 2001-08-17 05:16 PM

nicely written... good vocabulary usage and the flow is great.... as for the emotions... sometimes it just takes longer to get over and move on... doesn't mean it doesn't hurt or that it is easy... hope the days and nights get easier..and that time des help heal hurts...

	⇧ top of page ⇧
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.