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Open Poetry #15
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poetsguild
Member
since 2001-08-12
Posts 85
Florida

0 posted 2001-08-12 11:25 AM



He chanted of storms
purple rock sprays
and sad summer petals.

(she dreamed a wax-like moment)

He chewed on splinters
cursed the pebbles and
wallowed in a lumpy bed.

(she coddled her rainbows)

He pummeled the essential
wrung autumn tears
from the brown trees .

(she danced alone in the moonlight)

He skated on thin ice
always in danger of falling
through to his truth.

(she floated over the river)

Diamond-raw man
smooth her blue ache
as a frantic lust incubates.

(she loves the boiled juice)

© Copyright 2001 Melissa Songer - All Rights Reserved
Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

1 posted 2001-08-12 11:34 AM


He pummeled the essential
wrung autumn tears
from the brown trees .

(she danced alone in the moonlight)

He skated on thin ice
always in danger of falling
through to his truth.

(she floated over the river)

Diamond-raw man
smooth her blue ache
as a frantic lust incubates.
=====================

this is excellent..
you have a very unique and creative style
clever employ of imagery...very unique imagery as well.
the lines expressed with the parenthesis worked well.
very cool poetry.
Welcome to Passions..its nice to meet you.
I will look for more of your work  
jm

I know no one is to blame
In time youll feel strength when you call my name
I know Ill never hold you again
And I know Ill never be the same
VH

Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191
Cape Cod Massachusetts USA
2 posted 2001-08-12 12:04 PM


...and so ensues the season of symbiotic love.. I like it.. Welcome to Passions poetsguild - and check your email for a special greeting..
Janette
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2001-07-20
Posts 2843
Chicagoland for now
3 posted 2001-08-12 02:00 PM


I loved these lines:

"He chewed on splinters"

"always in danger of falling through to his truth"

Great read!

poetsguild
Member
since 2001-08-12
Posts 85
Florida
4 posted 2001-08-12 02:50 PM


Thank you Janet for your kind words. So glad you enjoyed this first offering.


nan, you nailed it! hahaha! And thanks for the card - loved the graphic - so appropriate.


Janette, thanks for your welcome and for commenting on my work.

rosepetals25
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Elite
since 2000-05-31
Posts 3076
PA
5 posted 2001-08-12 02:51 PM


poetsguild,
  
    Wow... I like this. It is a fresh and different style.. yay I also like the lines...

"He skated on thin ice
always in danger of falling
through to his truth."

    Welcome to passions I can't wait to see more.

TaraB

poetsguild
Member
since 2001-08-12
Posts 85
Florida
6 posted 2001-08-13 07:10 AM


Thank you for your comment, rosepetal. I hope to be posting more soon.
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