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Open Poetry #15
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After Iambe (Day 1)
| Open Poetry #15 |
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After Iambe (Day 1) |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
I was dust covered Just like the old truck By the time it Was dark. The bouncing roads Had wound me around And up again Always to the squeak Of old springs Protesting I stopped in Spauge, filled up The truck as I shook A hillside or two off My shirt and hat, Then headed For the one bar at the End of the street. Iambe hadn’t truly Left me She still danced in And on my thoughts As I walked into Smells of stale beer And sweat I almost panicked When I saw her sitting Back to me on a bar stool Would have sworn it was her But she turned and I saw She had totally different eyes I decided I wasn’t As thirsty as I thought And went the other way Down the street and found A place to stay Tomorrow I’d cross the Red And see what lay over New Mexico Way Tonight… I didn’t want to be troubled By any more I’s |
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| © Copyright 2001 Cpat Hair - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Lady In White
since 2001-02-12
Posts 2799USA |
Iambe has left...a sad day. I will miss her, and his thoughts of her. Perhaps he shall find...what? I don't know... sometimes he is as hard to understand as she is to love... but something must come from this... I shall continue to be ever vigilant in my watch... |
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JLR Senior Member
since 2001-02-04
Posts 1785 |
I seem to have just tuned into this storyline and so will need to read back a bit to understand enough to follow...in the meantime just wanted to say that I liked the visual quality of this and the feelings of panic and fatigue were audible. [This message has been edited by JLR (edited 07-26-2001).] |
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catalinamoon
since 2000-06-03
Posts 9543The Shores of Alone |
Yes, I didn't catch the whole story either, but the way you wrote it is very visual and arresting. Sandra |
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Cpat Hair
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793 |
Lady: Who knows where he'll wander or what will be found, perhaps they will find each other or themsleves... we'll see. JLR: Thanks for the comment... long story line and some if not most are posted in 14 I think... not neccessarily in chronological order..and probably a lot more work to read than its worth..but thank you a great deal for the comment and the interest. Catalina... thank you. there are many problems with writing a series..and one is allowing people to come in on it anywhere and feel like while there is more to the story, each piece also is a story in itself. Thanks folks..Iambe and her narrator are problemtatic to read and understand in some ways...and I appreciate you taking the time |
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bsquirrel
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855 |
Oooh, a pun that's played off well, with longing and a deep reach. I love this. |
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