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Open Poetry #15
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VAS
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-11-16
Posts 7450
Oregon

0 posted 2001-07-20 11:21 AM


please note date at the bottom, as I've not done my walk this day yet and it's still cool enough here, I'd better go soon


DAYBREAK
Virginia Salter

Morning has bro~ken,
cracks open my senses,
fill my eyes with glaring,
as odors flare  my nostrils,
and distant machines
drone in my ears.

Sweet brown sugar
and spice of cinnamon
accent the savor
of a vessel filled with grain,
as rich, dark,
leftover coffee
heats my inner domain.

Hardness of concrete
met each pounding step
as around a mile and a half block
I marched my morning trek.

Now every inch of skin
swelters a dripping rain,
as a begging for rest
makes its sweet refrain.

© August 4,  2000

© Copyright 2001 Virginia Salter - All Rights Reserved
Sunnyone
Member Ascendant
since 2000-07-06
Posts 5334
Staffordshire, England
1 posted 2001-07-20 11:25 AM


Oh yes......love this one, and especially the part about the leftover coffee!!  Thank God for microwaves!!  This is a wonderful description of early morn, my friend.

The road goes on forever, and the stories never end...
  
    


Cpat Hair
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793

2 posted 2001-07-20 11:32 AM


nicely done VAS... nice descriptive passages and imagery... got another cup of that coffee sitting around?


Flutterwings
Member
since 2001-07-10
Posts 288
Maine
3 posted 2001-07-20 12:12 PM


Good Golly lady!!!      You are good!!!.... Not only are you an avid *walker* but you write a great fluid rhyming piece of poetry.. I love every tumbling word.. Kudos!
((~.~))


Mishtheelf
Member
since 2001-07-10
Posts 68

4 posted 2001-07-20 12:31 PM


I love taking those walks as well, though I more often do so at night than in the mornings.  The stars do something for me.     *smells the coffee and car fumes*  Well described!

Teddy

VAS
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-11-16
Posts 7450
Oregon
5 posted 2001-07-20 12:43 PM


thanks all for reading/commenting, glad you enjoyed!

this was a last year poem, I used to compose in my mind while walking

this year I'm reading while I'm walking so don't compose with the pounding rhythm of my steps to build the cadence

now it's the uneven rhythm of my typing trying to keep up with my thought and also not go to far out in front of it  

[This message has been edited by VAS (edited 07-20-2001).]

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