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Open Poetry #15
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Cpat Hair
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793


0 posted 2001-07-18 11:27 AM


broken
pieces

glass
scattered in
sunlight
of thought
reflect
images
distorted by
perspective

collected

assembled

into
word windows
allowing
others to
see through
your
pains


© Copyright 2001 Cpat Hair - All Rights Reserved
Interloper
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-11-06
Posts 8369
Deep in the heart
1 posted 2001-07-18 11:37 AM


And only slightly distorted is the view
MARK V SHELDON
Member Elite
since 2001-06-21
Posts 3015
In a corporeal internship...
2 posted 2001-07-18 11:41 AM


Ron -- this one's AWESOME!  VERY powerful, descriptive, relateable, and clever.  I'm starting to love minimalism, in great part, thanks to your inspirations!  (And I really like the play on the word "pains"!)

-MVS

"When you tell the Truth, you never have to remember what you just said."
--Del Casher

[This message has been edited by MARK V SHELDON (edited 07-18-2001).]

Lady In White
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Member Elite
since 2001-02-12
Posts 2799
USA
3 posted 2001-07-18 11:45 AM



One can even see through the greens, blues, yellows and reds of this stained pane...

Well done, Sir!

Cpat Hair
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793

4 posted 2001-07-18 02:23 PM


Interloper.. distorted as are all views in some form.. Thanks for the comment pard... any cooler in TX today?


Mark.. now you are just making me blush..
I am glad you have enjoyed this and my other efforts at writing... Thank You


Lady.. yes all things are colored and the hues are different depending on whether you are looking in..or out


shadow974
Senior Member
since 2001-06-21
Posts 636
Michigan
5 posted 2001-07-18 03:16 PM


Wisely done. I like this very much.

Do not fear going forward slowly,
Fear only standing still.

Cpat Hair
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793

6 posted 2001-07-18 03:18 PM


Thanks Shadow... I do appreciate the comment!!

Corinne
Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167
state of confusion
7 posted 2001-07-18 10:56 PM


The stain of pain falls mainly on the panes.

Cool write, a figure 8 of a poem!

Corinne

VAS
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-11-16
Posts 7450
Oregon
8 posted 2001-07-18 10:59 PM


cool clever write...and yet the pieces of brokeness can be fitted together into a masterpiece of extreme beauty...isn't that an amazing thing!


Honeybee
Member Ascendant
since 1999-12-26
Posts 5372
Ontario, CANADA
9 posted 2001-07-18 11:05 PM



Wow - phenomenally expressed!
Very clever write!  

Melissa~

Mishtheelf
Member
since 2001-07-10
Posts 68

10 posted 2001-07-18 11:05 PM


*laughs*  I think I was looking at my backside at some point during that reading.  I enjoyed it.  
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