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Open Poetry #15
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The Presence of You
| Open Poetry #15 |
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The Presence of You |
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Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774Ontario, Canada 
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The Presence of You In momentary times of calm I hear you call my name, And turn to catch a glimpse of you … Through weary eyes I strain. Dimension lost to timeless realm, Illusions persevere, Through trickery of mind or light, I see your presence near. Though lost to life, not memory, I feel you manifest, And bring to mind the love I knew Too often long repressed. You rise to meet me on this path, The one I walk alone, Not ghostly, nor ethereal … No trepidation known. You bring to me, tranquility, A peacefulness sets in … I linger in the twilight found From low the depths within. In parallel, we saunter down Our lane of memories, Conversing on the life we shared Before these boundaries. I greet you as if yesterday We strolled in tandem here … Though in the score of truth and time, 'Twas long ago my dear. /Kit McCallum |
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| © Copyright 2001 Kit McCallum - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
You bring to me, tranquility, A peacefulness sets in … I linger in the twilight found From low the depths within. In parallel, we saunter down Our lane of memories, Conversing on the life we shared Before these boundaries. I greet you as if yesterday We strolled in tandem here … Though in the score of truth and time, 'Twas long ago my dear. =========================== Oh my...thy muse returns SINGING like an ANGEL.. Kit this is so lovely, the vocabulary and phrasing is superb and the harmony is wonderful...this reads with a melody of its own... the blendnig of emotions and imagery is poetically perfect This is a keeper...and a sweet moment of inspire heart hugs me smile by the mile poetess  jmFeels like Im dancing with truth and wisdom |
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VAS Member Rara Avis
since 2000-11-16
Posts 7450Oregon |
the rhythm of this is a gentle heartbeat with words in kind lovely |
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MARK V SHELDON Member Elite
since 2001-06-21
Posts 3015In a corporeal internship... |
Melifluously euphonic, Kit. Feelings stirred gently like cream in coffee... Very nicely written. -MVS "If you think you know it all, you have a lot to learn." |
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pure_innocence Member
since 2001-07-14
Posts 80Colorado, US |
Wow. um. . . uh. . . Wow. That is how I want to write. With a voice like yours. Beautiful piece. |
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Snow
since 2000-10-16
Posts 1170desert flower looking for rain |
brava!!! ::tosses roses:: this is excellent! snow "Trace my body with your words |
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Irish Rose Member Patricius
since 2000-04-06
Posts 10263 |
You, my dear, are a true poet. One I am proud to read. Your work shows through with a dedication and thoughtfulness mixed in with sincerity. Bless your writing! |
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shadow974 Senior Member
since 2001-06-21
Posts 636Michigan |
Wonderfuly done Kit, I'm begining to get hooked on this place because I'm learning so much from you and all the others too. Do not fear going forward slowly, |
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Mysteria
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
Kit, this was beautiful. In it was a lesson for me today to start remembering, so I don't forget. What a lovely tribute to a person you loved. Thank you for sharing it. ~If you have a choice to sit down or dance, I hope that you dance~ |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
What a wonderfully soothing piece of writing, Kit. (I know it's for me....very clever how you ended it with "my dear", mispelling deer to throw everybody off *wink*....my lips are sealed  ) |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Kit~ Girlfriend ... you're spot on ! This is so tender ... touching ... and sincere. In parallel, we saunter down Our lane of memories, Conversing on the life we shared Before these boundaries. I greet you as if yesterday We strolled in tandem here … Though in the score of truth and time, 'Twas long ago my deer. Just BEAUTIFULLY done~ Edited for you~  ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ |
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vlraynes Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-25
Posts 8229Somewhere... out there... |
Kit- This is just lovely...beautifully done..  Such a soft and tender write.. I love it..  hugs, ~vicky "...until you have read the verse on his |
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RSWells Member Elite
since 2001-06-17
Posts 2533 |
I found your words a lovely song, it's soothing melody, is bound to lure a soul to long a Lover's company. "Oh what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to decieve" |
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Logan Senior Member
since 2001-05-28
Posts 1641Arkansas |
Kit, very gentle smile, your tenderness and gentleness flows with your words. So very nicely done |
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EagleOne Member Elite
since 2000-03-07
Posts 2829Between a laugh and a tear... |
This is wonderfully delicate and graceful, excellent! "Friends are quiet angels who lift us to our |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
Very nice Kit...James |
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Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774Ontario, Canada |
Janet Marie: Thank you soooooo much JM, I always look so forward to your wonderful replies. You are a treasure and inspiration me deary. VAS: What a lovely comment Virginia … it is beautiful in and of itself, thank you. MARK: Oh my goodness Mark … such beautiful words and visuals. Thank you so much for this absolutely beautiful reply. Snow: Thank you so much Snow … I've caught them and placed them right here beside the computer, many thanks. Irish Rose: Thank you so much for this beautiful and encouraging response Kathleen. This means a great deal to me, and is so inspiring … I am very appreciative. shadow974: Oh, it's such a wonderful place Shadow, so much talent shines from within these walls, it's a treasure-trove of inspiration for all. I truly hope you will continue to enjoy it as so many of us do. Thank you. Mysteria: This was actually a poem I struggled over quite a bit Sharon, as my first drafts tried to convey far too much … I left a fair bit on the editing room floor, LOL. You've captured the message I was trying for in the final version … that although time passes, our memories are there to cherish always, no matter how much time goes by ... I'm glad you enjoyed. Balladeer: I'm glad you found this a tranquil piece Michael, thank you. Now shhhhhhhhhhhhh … you just might give away all of my elaborate planning! Marge: Doh! Now see Michael? ROFL! Loved the editing Marge, and thank you for the beautiful words of encouragement, you are so very much appreciated. Vlraynes: I'm glad you enjoyed this Vicky, and thank you so much for these wonderfully encouraging words. RSWells: What a lovely comment RS … thank you very much for these thoughtful words, I'm very grateful. Logan: Thank you so much Logan, your gentle smile flows beautifully with the feeling I hoped to capture, I'm very appreciative. EagleOne: I'm so glad you enjoyed EagleOne … I wanted to say a thank you again for that lovely poem with the question "will the eagle fly" … it has really stayed with me, thank you. James: I'm very grateful you enjoyed this piece James, many thanks to you for these kind words. Much appreciation to all, /Kit |
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Denise
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-08-22
Posts 22648 |
Excellent writing, Kit! This one touched me deeply. |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Kit, Well done, I always enjoy your writing. Sy |
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Mishtheelf Member
since 2001-07-10
Posts 68 |
It has not yet ceased to amaze me, the talent that I see on this forum! I didn't think there was a place where so many great writers were congregated. You definately belong among them, Kit. This particular work sends me reeling down my own little memory lane. Things sometimes I don't want to remember, but I'm glad I do. ^-^ It's definately moving. |
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Lady In White
since 2001-02-12
Posts 2799USA |
Don't know how I missed this piece, Kit...so well done, so on the gentle side of life, soft recall, no remorse, but each to other, set different course... well done m'dear.... and if you inspired it, our 'Deer...hats off to you.... we are all fortunate in the fallout... |
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