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Teen Poetry #5

First Post (Untitled)

Captain_Simian
New Member

since 2002-07-15

Posts 5

0 posted 2002-08-27 07:05 AM

I stand there awkward, lost, afraid, stupid.
I don’t want to move, I don’t want to go.
I just want to stay, not walk away.
I think you may know, but won’t let it show.

My desires my fears, from all of my years,
Can’t compare to this, the only true bliss.
With you I could share, a lifetime of care.

For the moment I’m shocked, my legs remain locked.
A glimpse of you, is a doorway through
To a place so bright, so full of delight
I hope you don’t mind, I think I’ll go blind
So I never erase, these beautiful days.

Allysa

Senior Member

since 1999-11-09

Posts 1952
In an upside-down garden

1 posted 2002-08-27 10:50 AM

Welcome to the forums....
I'll reply more later....

ich bin schwul, ich bin jüdisch und ein Kommunist dazu, Ich bin schwarz und behindert, doch genauso Mensch wie du ~Wizo

anya
Member

since 2002-07-27

Posts 393
London, UK

2 posted 2002-08-27 10:50 AM

what a good first post! this had a really nice quality to it, anyway I hope to see more from you soon,
Anya

Moon Dust

Member Elite

since 1999-06-11

Posts 2177
Skelmersdale, UK

3 posted 2002-08-27 11:00 AM

This was a little bit sad. But what a way to make an entrance Welcome to Passions and welcome to Teen.

If your afraid of the dark, then why did you come?

Chel2082
Junior Member

since 2002-07-23

Posts 40
Baltimore, MD

4 posted 2002-08-27 04:22 PM

Good first piece, i liked the rhyming in this piece keep up the good work.

<3 chel

With GOD all things are possible...<3 CHEL

Captain_Simian
New Member

since 2002-07-15

Posts 5

5 posted 2002-08-29 07:50 AM

Thanks for the kind words

i'll hopefully get some sort of inspiration soon to write some more

TradingSpaces19
Member

since 2002-08-31

Posts 134
Arvada, Colorado

6 posted 2002-09-02 09:12 PM

Hey welcome to passions! This is a great poem. I hope to read more from you soon. Please read my poem called "Mountain Dew", and reply thanx. Keep up the good work!

"Whether you think you can or you think you can't, you're right." -Bach

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