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Teen Poetry #5
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Carly Maas
Junior Member
since 2000-04-21
Posts 23
Garden City, MI, USA

0 posted 2002-03-12 07:53 PM


We all know the phrase “April showers bring may flowers”,
Well, I wish I could say the same,
From now on my April’s just won’t be the same.

That was the April you walked into my life,
When I met you, everything seemed to be just so bright,
Since the first sight of you,
You were all I thought about,
I thought we would be together,
It seemed so right.

When you asked me out that day,
My heart dropped into my stomach,
And I couldn’t believe that something so great could happen to me.

For the weeks to follow,
You filled my days with love and joy,
And you filled my dreams at night.

But soon I found that it would end,
That warm day in May,
You walked away,
You left my heart in pieces,
How could you be so cruel?

I wish that you could take back what you did to me on that warm day in May.

Even though till this day we still talk,
And we’re still good friends,
Nothing could ever be the same,
Since what you did to me that warm day in May.

So you see how that phrase will never be true,
And it’s all because of you,
Maybe some it will be true,
It’s going to take some time though,
But until then,
I’m through with you.

"One day you'll love me as I onced loved you,
one day you'll cry over me, as I once cried over
you, and one day you'll want me but I won't want you.

© Copyright 2002 Carly Maas - All Rights Reserved
LCBS
Senior Member
since 2001-11-29
Posts 532
Connecticut
1 posted 2002-03-12 08:02 PM


ok so lets say this "april flowers bring May showers" no? you dont like it?

Ok great write, and it will get better, it always does, by next may you will have lots of flowers in your life!

~Lisa

Android 18
Member
since 2002-02-20
Posts 61
Austrailia (My DreamLand)
2 posted 2002-03-12 09:02 PM


I liked it, the organizing of the stanzas really worked for this poem.
~*~Serena~*~

cherish
Senior Member
since 2001-03-25
Posts 1639
swimming in fairy floss...........
3 posted 2002-03-13 04:22 AM


i liked the way this was written, you started off with the phrase and used it to end it very well well. its a sad poem with sad sentiments, but you did a very good job of retelling the story. it made the experience somewhat 'enjoyable'. sad but beautiful carly, well done

Zombie

Torn are her limbs
By quiet hands that
Tug life(color) out of her.
Gnawing edges round
Into a broken(satisfying)
Shadow

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