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Teen Poetry #5
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Ceinwyn
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since 2000-07-09
Posts 2175
VA

0 posted 2002-03-11 04:51 PM


Sarcastic tone
In my voice tonight
Fake laughs
Echoing on the other end
Little does he know it
That I'm somewhere in between
Flipping stations
On my minds frequency
He's desperately trying
To get to know me
But I'm not going to let him know
That I'm staring down at
The unfolded map before me
Not really focusing
On his words
And warm voice
I really don't want to get close
I really don't want him to know
I just don't want him
To be caught up
And then leave me
If he finds out that
I'm somewhere in between...


[This message has been edited by Ceinwyn (03-11-2002 04:59 PM).]

© Copyright 2002 Kristen Brandon - All Rights Reserved
Skyfire
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since 2000-12-27
Posts 3381
Riding
1 posted 2002-03-11 06:20 PM


I don't know what to say to this one. I like it, and I think I know where you're at, but I'm not positive. It's a good read though, thanks!

I want to die peacefully, in my sleep, like my grandfather, not screaming, terrified, like his passengers.

LCBS
Senior Member
since 2001-11-29
Posts 532
Connecticut
2 posted 2002-03-11 08:23 PM


Kris, this is really good, but I dont think you should be afraid to open up to people, maybe get to know them first, but never keep the real you hidden..Great Write


~Lisa

Cinderelly
Member
since 2001-12-31
Posts 189
NM, USA
3 posted 2002-03-11 09:15 PM


I can totally realte to this . . . I loved the line "Flipping stations, On my minds frequency" !

Life is a moderately good play w/ a badly written thrid act. - Unknown

cherish
Senior Member
since 2001-03-25
Posts 1639
swimming in fairy floss...........
4 posted 2002-03-13 04:51 AM


"Little does he know it
That I'm somewhere in between
Flipping stations
On my minds frequency"
LOVED those lines...the imagery was awesome. i think you did very well with venting your emotions in this piece kris...more, miss!

Zombie

Torn are her limbs
By quiet hands that
Tug life(color) out of her.
Gnawing edges round
Into a broken(satisfying)
Shadow

Marshalzu
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since 2001-02-15
Posts 2681
Lurking
5 posted 2002-03-13 09:16 AM


I loved the imagery that you managed to capture and the way you managed to air you feelings without them taking over the poem and letting it turn into a rant. thanks for sharing

Andrew

"The pin didn't drop it came and crashed down"

PoetryIsLife
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Senior Member
since 2001-10-27
Posts 1763
...in my boxers...
6 posted 2002-03-14 04:25 AM


Kristen, I enjoyed it. Another great write, my dear.

~ Titus

Will I ever forget what happened today?

xShUgArHiGhx
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Member Elite
since 2000-09-26
Posts 3150
tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs
7 posted 2002-03-14 08:04 AM


Aww hun this was so sad! Being caught in between is not a horrible place to be. I know  the feeling of not wanting people to get too close though...i completely understand. great write!

iTs bEeN 1 Of ThOsE dAyZ 4 2 MaNY dAyZ nOw..I jUst NeEd a DaY whErE tHe WOrLd cAn tAkE cArE of ItsElf..

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