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laconic
Member

since 2002-02-17

Posts 64
Melbourne, Australia

0 posted 2002-02-23 08:15 AM

[just drafting....]

Let me whisk you away
into another world today
to change your perception
on your current arrangement

in the eyes of everything out there
your not what you seem
what goes on inside you.. another dream
in our own worlds of phantasy
we're conquereors of all we see
but in reality
we're just dumb and blind, trying to believe
In all the things that make us feel secure
never facing danger thats for sure.

To do all the things you never did before
is crazy talk.. right ya'all?
let go of all inhibitions and just walk thru the streets naked.
or speak your mind and no matter what comes take it.
can you do that?
just walk in any door and meet a new person.
ask a stranger a personal question, and begin learning.
never before did we stand tall,
but once you've faced what u havent before...
your heart is light, not fearing no more.

and in the words of that evil evil conglormorate...
"Just do it"

my inspiration has drained like perspiration ..again i'm empty like hemp i been smoked dry...*sigh*

[This message has been edited by laconic (02-23-2002 08:39 AM).]

xShUgArHiGhx

Member Elite

since 2000-09-26

Posts 3150
tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs

1 posted 2002-02-23 11:53 AM

"Just do it!"

This was a great poem!! You really gave off the let-loose-and-go-wild vibe...awesome job...!

mE & cHrIsTiNe GaVe A WhOlE nEw mEaNiNg tO ThE wOrD "iNcOgNiTo"

Kandi
Member

since 2000-06-14

Posts 354
North of Hell

2 posted 2002-02-23 01:56 PM

I really liked this...lots of energy and pep, just what i needed to get me pumped up for dance rehearsal, which is where I'm off to right now. Awesome job, keep up the writing!
Bye!

The day you were born, you were born free
That is your privilege.

laconic
Member

since 2002-02-17

Posts 64
Melbourne, Australia

3 posted 2002-02-23 07:02 PM

thank you

Voiceless
Senior Member

since 2001-02-19

Posts 686
Under the stars upon the wind

4 posted 2002-02-24 01:51 PM

I'm liking your style!
This is really an
interesting and neat poem!
Great job!

Freedom is not Free (Korean War memorial)

cherish
Senior Member

since 2001-03-25

Posts 1639
swimming in fairy floss...........

5 posted 2002-02-28 05:12 AM

lol...i like your last line...VERY evil conglomerate!

i like the draft..t'was pretty good...cant wait for the final copy

-i notice we have ANOTHER aussie!

...bring on the world pip, we have another aussie!

Zombie

Torn are her limbs
By quiet hands that
Tug life(color) out of her.
Gnawing edges round
Into a broken(satisfying)
Shadow

laconic
Member

since 2002-02-17

Posts 64
Melbourne, Australia

6 posted 2002-02-28 05:33 AM

hehe... go the green and gold eh

anonymousfemale
Member Elite

since 2000-02-02

Posts 2797
Limbo

7 posted 2002-02-28 10:45 PM

This is a really interesting piece. My mind is a little clogged up today but I can gather the general theme of the piece. Well done.

So another Melbournite!! YAY!!! *is from Melbourne* Nice to see you gracing our pages. I look forward to finding more of your work around here. Remember to reply too.

~AF~

::Most people never listen::
Ernest Hemingway

laconic
Member

since 2002-02-17

Posts 64
Melbourne, Australia

8 posted 2002-03-01 09:58 PM

Hey AF if u were in the city yesterday, i hope you remembered to dontate to one of those red cross people, as i was one of those red cross people

go the red cross

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