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ScrpyCJ
New Member

since 2002-06-24

Posts 9

0 posted 2002-06-27 02:19 PM

The walls are closing in on me,
My life is slipping away,
My love wasn't truly my love,
She slowly turned away,
She coaxed me into her trap,
I shared my love with her,
We talked and shared some moments together,
She really didn't love me,
I know for this is not my love,
Because she lied to me,
She doesn't know one single thing,
that puts me piece by piece,
She used me like I was a rock,
I didn't see it,
Not even a bit,
Its because I loved her
And she didn't love me back,
Get out of my life,
Stay away from my heart,
You cheated your way through my heart,
For the last time.

cutiepiesugarbabie
Member

since 2002-06-07

Posts 110
A Cloud In the Sky

1 posted 2002-06-27 05:41 PM

wow a lil harsh...but a good poem!

o*~Everyone makes mistakes-get over them and make more tomorrow!~*o

Tomer
Senior Member

since 2002-06-28

Posts 1168
Michigan

2 posted 2002-06-29 12:26 PM

A very strong piece, very deep. Well done.

Tomer

Dark Enchantress
Senior Member

since 1999-07-27

Posts 1258
meet Morgana

3 posted 2002-06-30 11:02 AM

It sounded a little shrill and teary, but still strong enough. Like you weren't just telling her that it wasn't real love and to stay away, but telling yourself as well. I think that's interesting because it shows the inner weaknesses and defences of our state of mentality. I think there's a lot to be said for a person that can stand up for themselves (especially when it comes to someone you had "love" for). Good job.

[Jaime]

"I think I would like to call myself 'the girl who wanted to be God'." Sylvia Plath

[This message has been edited by Dark Enchantress (06-30-2002 11:02 AM).]

Tess7
New Member

since 2002-06-30

Posts 4

4 posted 2002-06-30 05:50 PM

I thought that was cool, realistic and that's why I liked it. Nice

punkrockerrobin