Made A fool out of a believer

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xShUgArHiGhx

Member Elite

since 2000-09-26

Posts 3150
tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs

0 posted 2002-01-15 01:38 PM

One more time,
An it will all come crashing down.
One more step over the line,
And your infamous smile will turn to an infamous frown.
How did it get this far,
When was i to know to stop?
When i needed to go to the emergency room?
Or on those days my heart would rot.
Was it when you screamed,
You scream so much you heart grew sore.
Or when you looked down silent,
And in pity of me your heart dropped to the floor.
How was i suppose to know,
It would turn out this way.
When will you stop believing,
Tomorrow will be a better day?

yOu GeT wAt u PaId 4 bUt i JuS hAd nO..iNtEnTion oF liVin tHis waY --Counting crows

Dark Enchantress
Senior Member

since 1999-07-27

Posts 1258
meet Morgana

1 posted 2002-01-15 04:26 PM

How was i suppose to know,
It would turn out this way.
When will you stop believing,
Tomorrow will be a better day?

That was my favorite part of the poem. You had a very solid ending with a lot of meaning behind it. It makes the reader really think about the situation and how it applies to them. Which is always enjoyable.

I think most of the time when people always try to believe that tomorrow will be a better day because if they don't have that hope... then they have nothing left. What more would there be to fight for? Nothing. Personally I don't have that optimistic way of thinking. I believe in myself. I believe in my own strength and abilities. I believe that's what's worth fighting for and that's what will get me through. *shrugs* We all have our own way of getting by.

Thanks for posting this. I really liked it.

The only thing that I fear is to die quietly.

Read between the lines.

jaimespoetry.blogspot.com

TopGunLauren
Senior Member

since 2000-08-02

Posts 718
California

2 posted 2002-01-15 05:32 PM

Your poems always seem to realate to what I feel or am going through and this one is no exception.I know it seems like tomorrow will never get better and 99 percent of the time it doesn't, but you have to believe some day it will.Even though I don't believe it myself most of the time I have to keep telling myself to stay strong.But anyway I love this poem and keep up the awsome work.
Lauren

"I just needed someone to talk to you were just to busy with yourself."-Staind

"You've got to get yourself together you got stuck in a moment and y

banburycross
Senior Member

since 2001-03-27

Posts 946
viginia

3 posted 2002-01-16 01:17 PM

you put a lot of yourself into this piece and i had chills by the end. you write some really beautifulp poetry and you weave your emotions in beautifully. i look forward to reading more.

Sometimes, the things that go unsaid are the only things worth hearing.

xShUgArHiGhx

Member Elite

since 2000-09-26

Posts 3150
tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs

4 posted 2002-01-16 10:02 PM

Thank u everyone

yOu GeT wAt u PaId 4 bUt i JuS hAd nO..iNtEnTion oF liVin tHis waY --Counting crows

Fading Away

Member Elite

since 2001-03-14

Posts 3131
Lynchburg, Virginia

5 posted 2002-01-17 01:06 PM

Oh wow... this one hit me so hard... it was painful to read. I'm so glad you got out of that situation.

"One more step over the line,
And your infamous smile will turn to an infamous frown."

Very heavy topic, indeed. And you did a very good job with it... *hugs*

--Marie

I wish your fingers could touch all I can't say... no should ever feel this alone.

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