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Teen Poetry #5
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NathanS
Member
since 2001-09-27
Posts 106
CA

0 posted 2001-12-07 11:40 PM


Meh, interesting poem i've done. Probably not my best; but ah well.

A stirring sensation,
with the battle for,
my heart of which,
I can't so easily give.

The confusion of thoughts,
that are not so easily,
turned to the way,
that may seem so easy to go.

My love for one not,
easily disturbed by,
distractions of another,
that might be a danger.

A friend that may,
be lethal but not an,
entire threat to me,
or us.

It's like a bomb that,
is ticking in the wrong,
direction then wanted,
so what shall be done,
to keep my relationship,
with you.

Call the bomb squad.


            -Dreys

© Copyright 2001 NathanS - All Rights Reserved
Acies
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665
Twilight Zone
1 posted 2001-12-12 06:02 PM


Hmmm too much confusion in life I see
Just keep searching for the answers and youll find em
Just remember, the answers are from all that is good
thanks for sharing

là où est mon amour?
donde está mi amour?
wo ist meine Liebe?
Nelly Furtado é a menina a mais bonita no mundo largo do todo.


HopelessRomanticGuy
Member
since 2001-08-17
Posts 495
LI, New York
2 posted 2001-12-12 06:25 PM


Sounds like a lot of confusion there.  I think something like that happens to everyone, if I got the meaning right.  I think I'm in a sittuation  that fits the description now.  Oh well.  Love the poem.

Don't Drink and Park!
Accidents may cause People!

MindlessPoet
Member
since 2001-04-20
Posts 106
Texas
3 posted 2001-12-12 11:58 PM


'tis an interesting poem   but it's kind of hard to read with all the commas.
and the sig with the drinking and parking is funny.

For now, all I can do is dream.

Fading Away
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2001-03-14
Posts 3131
Lynchburg, Virginia
4 posted 2001-12-13 10:07 AM


Very interesting analogy.  And understandable, of course.  The emphasis of the ticking of the bomb made for a neat effect.  I really enjoyed this.  Nicely done!

--Marie

If there's one thing I've learned, it's that the most frustrated people in the world are those who know they're stupid, but keep trying anyway.

anonymousfemale
Member Elite
since 2000-02-02
Posts 2797
Limbo
5 posted 2001-12-13 08:55 PM


I like what this represented.
I hope things have been sorted out for you.
Living in a world of chaos is never any good.

Thanks for sharing.

~AF~

Caution: Filling is hot.

prov1717
Member
since 2001-12-26
Posts 74
NE
6 posted 2001-12-26 08:46 PM


aah the confusion, a feeling that is known way too well.  i liked the poem, keep it up and best of luck.
peace
leslie

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