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Teen Poetry #5
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The Winding Way
| Teen Poetry #5 |
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The Winding Way |
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fozzyozzy Member
since 2001-03-15
Posts 336Lessburg Virginia 
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The Winding Way walking step for step with tiny little houses Filled with tiny little lives and some are children playing towards a late night and lightning bugs to keep the day breathing There is the whole of Autumn Along the solitude of my path past lakes whose splashing mixes tones with the highway Both bound and free Exeter lake opens such as an ocean the fountain spray lingering under a foggy golden sky I see three ducks bobbing over the waves in Exeter lake narily stirring this is peace even against the endless waves of water and wind The water seeps into the mud the grass dies behind the fence Three broken pieces of glass are on my path gravel covers the ground and the cold looses its charm How long always am I out here? tiny little houses once again hide tiny little secrets I'm alone again playing useless games with a mockingbird still this is PEACE dried out on forgotten paths kept in front of fences and playing in the leaves... "and Death i think is no paranthesis"-e.e. cummings |
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| © Copyright 2001 Sean Michael DeFlora - All Rights Reserved | |||
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cherish Senior Member
since 2001-03-25
Posts 1639swimming in fairy floss........... |
i loved it sean. the quaint little town with the little roads and the small but fulfilled lives...painted a wonderful picture in my mind....thanks for sharing poet.... |
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DawnG 
since 2000-06-23
Posts 1494United States |
Fozzy, I can hardly tear this poem apart. It is wonderful. Very wonderful imagery you have presented here. Dawn |
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-Myriad- New Member
since 2001-11-24
Posts 6Canada |
Sean: This someone simple piece (yet abstract in appearance) seems to be deeper than what it really is. I would guess and make my own interpretations, but I'd much rather sit back and enjoy what you wrote rather than disect it's every little meaning that sometimes lies behind the words. Your title makes me think of a road that leads on and on, which matches the poem's format as it seems to continually wind. An interesting, yet unique way to present this to us. Thank you for the change. *smiles* I thoroughly enjoyed your imagery of the children, as well as the landscape that you describe. It reminds me of the prairies. *smiles* The openness that you express gives this piece an even more special quality that you are to be commended for. Your poems may look better in pieces, but that is only a personal request, and I find myself content just reading it as a whole. Your poem puts forth the qualities of a true poet. I congratulate you on a job well done! I hope to see many more posts from you, Sean...it's been too long. -Myriad- Infinitum. [This message has been edited by -Myriad- (edited 11-26-2001).] |
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banburycross Senior Member
since 2001-03-27
Posts 946viginia |
hey, i haven't seen any of your work in a while and im really glad i was able to catch this one. you did a beautiful job, i think its the best poem ive read by anyone in a while. you paint some really beautiful images here, definetely a piece for my library. Sometimes, the things that go unsaid are the only things worth hearing. |
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chasing rain Senior Member
since 2001-05-15
Posts 737Canada |
Seany! You and your formatting...^_^ What will you think of next? Not only is the formatting neat, the words and content, the imagery, the symbolism, the self-expression...just wow. You really have a good grip on poetry as an art. Your poems always have this fascinating quality about them. A somewhat misleading, yet some how so incredibly perceptive and full of abstract thoughts, you create poems so unlike the others I've seen so far. A very original style. You are definately getting up there! Keep up the stuff. -Myriad- was right...it has been too long. ++ Leah ++ Va pensiero sull' ali dorate... |
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vlraynes Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-25
Posts 8229Somewhere... out there... |
fozzyozzy- This is excellent! I really enjoyed the picture it painted in my mind as I read.  Wonderfully penned. Hugs, ~Vicky "...until you have read the verse on his heart, |
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punkrockerrobin
since 2001-05-15
Posts 1180Sparks, NV |
i liked this poem a lot! great work! robin |
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xShUgArHiGhx
since 2000-09-26
Posts 3150tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs |
This poem brought me back to my childhood somewhat...your words showed me beautiful images...eat job! ShE'S nOt ThE kInDa GiRL..WhO lIkeS tO tElL tHe WorLd AbOuT tHe Way She FEEL'S aBouT hErSelf...ShE tAkEs a LiTtLe TiMe In MakIn uP hEr MiNd.. |
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Fading Away
since 2001-03-14
Posts 3131Lynchburg, Virginia |
Wow, it's been a while since I've seen you around, Sean. Very nice work. A very powerful piece, and the staggered lines worked marvelously. Nicely done, and I hope to read more, hopefully soon. Come back, y'hear!  --Marie If there's one thing I've learned, it's that the most frustrated people in the world are those who know they're stupid, but keep trying anyway. |
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prov1717 Member
since 2001-12-26
Posts 74NE |
what can i say? i like it a lot, you created a beautiful picture in my mind, excellent use of imagery. i hope to see more of your work soon! |
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