Reality Check - pipTalk Forums

How to Join	Member's Area	Private Library	Search	Sanctuary		Login
Main Forums	Discussion	Tech Talk	Mature Content	Archives	A home without a wall, Our haven without ends, A circle we all call Our Family of Friends!

Missthang
Member

since 2001-07-03

Posts 103

0 posted 2001-11-08 01:38 AM

I live my life for other people, my true happiness comes from seeing smiles on others faces. And I never thought that giving to much love could be a bad thing. But lately I've been feeling like I'm to nice and as a result people take advantage of me and they walk all over me. And sadly, I don't seem to mind because I still won't change my ways.
Reality Check

When I was only 5,
I was true to you.
I let you have the red crayon,
and I always settled for blue.

When I turned 10
I had a favorite video game.
Still I let you play the one you liked,
even though I thought it was lame.

Then came my sweet 16,
and my drivers liscence to.
I liked to drive yet I gave up my keys,
it made you happy, I did it for you.

Now I'm 19,
and I'm getting to old for this.
True I live to make you happy,
but I can't always settle for second best.

I can't live like I did,
when I was only 10 and 5.
I have to put myself first
yet I can't help but ask why.

The older people get,
the more they realize.
They can get whatever they want,
becasue I think with a 5-year-olds mind.

And if I know all this,
why won't I change my ways?
Easier said than done,
I'll grow up one of these days.

*This is horrible and I know, HELP ME to make it better. I was really just jotting down ideas because I couldn't sleep until I did*

Jenn Cirrincione

Member Elite

since 2000-07-02

Posts 2107
Fl

1 posted 2001-11-08 09:05 AM

I can't think of any specific critques at the moment, sorry. But I DO relate to this situation. It sucks when the "nice girl" becomes a doormat. BLAH... I hope things get better for you.

Jenn

"I want love on my own terms; after everything I've ever learned. Me, I carry too much baggage..."

DawnG

Senior Member

since 2000-06-23

Posts 1494
United States

2 posted 2001-11-08 12:47 PM

MissThang,

I always do the same thing! Well, I'm slowly learning not to, but I've grown up doing the same thing. You see I'm disabled and I've always felt like people are doing me a favor being my friends, so I don't want them to leave cause I needed friends in my life so bad that I always just went along with what they want to do. The past two years though I have met some friends who aren't doing me a favor being my friend, and are my friend because they love the person I am. Amazing how nice it is to be able to have my own opinions. Thanks for sharing this poem.

Dawn

Local Parasite

Member Elite

since 2001-11-05

Posts 2527
Transylconia, Winnipeg

3 posted 2001-11-08 01:31 PM

This isn't so horrible. It had an intriguing storyline to it. I thought it worked just fine.

Theo

AngelPoet87
Member

since 2001-04-21

Posts 280
Indy

4 posted 2001-11-08 03:52 PM

I personally really liked the end, though all of it was pretty good.
~Ali

Liefhe alle ten spijte van duivel... A tes souhaits... A tes amours... Qu ils restent. Jatdore.

Honey
Member

since 2001-10-09

Posts 92
Hot girl From Canada

5 posted 2001-11-08 05:03 PM

This was actually quite good. I hoenstly think you wrote it well.

It Feels As If I've Always Been Someone On The Outside Looking In.

He Who Laughs Last Thinks Slowest!!

vixengrl04
Member

since 2001-04-26

Posts 495
East Haddam, CT

6 posted 2001-11-08 05:10 PM

I know just what it feels like to constantly go out of your way to make others happy, even if it means taking away from your own happiness. I really like the way that you went from different stages in life and the different things you gave up during these times. Great way to show what you're talking about. I noticed a couple places where you might wanna switch around the order of the paragraphs or reword a few things, but other than that it was great!!

~*Nikki*~

~*I'd rather you hate me for what I am than love me for what I'm not.*~

Missthang
Member

since 2001-07-03

Posts 103

7 posted 2001-11-08 05:43 PM

vixengrl04, if you don't mind could you help me out with that. could you tell me exactly what words were out of place or what stanzas could be switched. that would be appreciated.

and to all of you....thanks so much for the feedback on my poems. i know i don't usually thank you but that doesn't mean i don't appreciated it. so thanks for everything (on this poem and all my other ones)

*The heart is a house for love*

TopGunLauren
Senior Member

since 2000-08-02

Posts 718
California

8 posted 2001-11-08 06:01 PM

Wow...it's amazing how much I can relate to exactly what you said in your poem.Just like you I live my life for my friends no matter what they need or want I will help them get it even if it means me giving up everything.But just like you I realized that I can't live my whole life for them and I have to do things to make myself happy.Because I'm sick of being the one who has to be strong all the time and listento there probelms.But anyway I love your poem and keep up the great work and hopefully everything gets better for you.
Lauren

cutie2005
Member

since 2000-04-30

Posts 148
Bennett, Colorado USA

9 posted 2001-11-08 06:20 PM

Acutally... Humm I really like this!! It was great! That is what i used to think, i was always to nice... But the thing is, I'm nice to people who don't get along with everyone else.. and i can be ruder to the ones that get all the attintion... So I don't know i think i'm fine haha!! But very nice way, and i say stay nice, just know when sumone is using it for their own good instead of yours!
Always,
Amanda

If you love someone you would go to the end of the world for them!

Dopey Dope

Moderator

Member Patricius

since 2000-08-30

Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico

10 posted 2001-11-09 02:39 AM

Sometimes you just need time for yourself. Sometimes you just need to realize that was is GOOD is what is individually good for you. Something I am learning here in college is that justice can be a problem. The problem with justice is that it is of dual nature. What might be just for the individual might be unjust for the mass and what might be just for the mass might be just for the individual (you).
Now, the basic definition of justice is the search for perfection through human virtue.
All in all.....you just need to weigh out whether what is good for you is bad for another, and if it is bad for another....is it necessarily bad in itself?

Sometimes it is JUST to think for your own benefit......good luck, good poem.

I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

Somewhere out there a cow is laughing at you

xShUgArHiGhx

Member Elite

since 2000-09-26

Posts 3150
tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs

11 posted 2001-11-09 10:06 AM

I thought this was a completely awesome poem! I barely even kno how to respond to it! You present an interesting problem and i really am not shur how you should go about dealing with it but i hope things work out...

ShE'S nOt ThE kInDa GiRL..WhO lIkeS tO tElL tHe WorLd AbOuT tHe Way She FEEL'S aBouT hErSelf...ShE tAkEs a LiTtLe TiMe In MakIn uP hEr MiNd..

	⇧ top of page ⇧
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.