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Teen Poetry #5
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zarina
Member
since 2001-05-19
Posts 180


0 posted 2001-10-06 11:29 AM


/floating in the air/no one seems to care/whispers in my head/even they are nearly dead/Im no longer/Im someone else/somewhere else/my actions are mine/my sorrows the same/and oh, I've got no one to blame/shivers every nigth/shallow dreams locked in an open cage/secret is my name/silence is my friend/and of course I can pretend/tough I know very well/          
            this will never end


-*-*- well..may be a bad comeback after "beautiful alone", but.. hm. then that was maybe my best poem ever. anyways, I've got some kind of a problem here: I dont really have much time to spend at pip (too bad, I know), so I don't respond to much now.. And then maybe I shouldn't post anything either, cause that would be a bit.. unfair or something. yeah, you see. I think I'll post 2 poems today, and no more. In a while. hmm...*-*-*

I'm always myslef. Isn't that enough for you?

© Copyright 2001 zarina - All Rights Reserved
SEA
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 Tours
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676
with you
1 posted 2001-10-06 12:52 PM


this is good, post what you can and reply when you can  
Skyfire
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2000-12-27
Posts 3381
Riding
2 posted 2001-10-06 08:45 PM


I like this one a lot... Like the format, not too much of the format you used in here... We'll miss you posting!

Maybe in order to understand mankind, we have to look at the word itself: "Mankind". Basically, it's made up of two separate words - "mank" and "ind".

anonymousfemale
Member Elite
since 2000-02-02
Posts 2797
Limbo
3 posted 2001-10-07 05:50 AM


I know how you feel here. It will never end....how true in a sense but how wrong in others. It might end. I suppose, in a way, it is up to us in the long run to create our own happiness and harmony because relying on other people usually fails.
The format I didn't like too much BUT it is different so that does count for something. Have you had a look at it with breaks instead of just forward slashes? It might look better and it might be a bit easier to read.

Take care of yourself and like Sea said, reply when you can. We're not going anywhere and replies are always appreciated.  

~AF~

I look at myself in the mirror; am I vital today?
Nelly Furtado - Hey Man

cherish
Senior Member
since 2001-03-25
Posts 1639
swimming in fairy floss...........
4 posted 2001-10-08 12:31 PM


shallow dreams locked in an open cage

wow that line really caught my attention- it made me sit and think about it for a few minutes. wonderfully vivd imagery here carina, i think you did wonderfully with this poem...i find it really difficult to hold things inside me, and carrying secrets about myself is really hard. keep posting your work, we enjoy reading it. its ok if you dont have all that much time anymore, just as long as you pop in here once in a while..

wouldnt it be wonderful if children werent scared of looking up at the sky?

       

Spice
Senior Member
since 2001-04-13
Posts 1266
Resting in my cardboard box.
5 posted 2001-10-20 12:43 PM


"secret is my name/silence is my friend"

LOVED the write, Though didn't much care for the format...
Sorry I'm so late replying...Hope to see you in PIP more soon....I'll be glum if you stop posting..

Every now and then I like to stick my foot in my mouth...

Charisma
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Ascendant
since 2000-09-30
Posts 5906
lost in blue pages
6 posted 2001-10-20 01:28 PM


Beautifully written!

Charisma

fearing-laughter
Senior Member
since 2001-04-24
Posts 605
land of cheese (Wisconsin)
7 posted 2001-10-29 01:06 AM


-zarina-
hey i don't know if you remember me, but high.  i like your poem, it seems pretty sad (u can just call me captain obvious) but it's also how i'm feeling now.  emotions suck (at least in my opinion) but having people to vent with seems to help.  if ya ever wanna e-mail me, click the little linky thing.  great poem.  bye bye.
-bergundy-

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