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pharon
Member

since 1999-11-13

Posts 251
alabama

0 posted 2001-10-04 03:23 AM

             some
             were
                  like
                  you
              cold
           between morning
             and the frost of
                  kisses
               dreams bloom
                   above a
                 sleepcloud
                      heavy with
                   music

                           taste
                           naked
                           sound
            me

xShUgArHiGhx

Member Elite

since 2000-09-26

Posts 3150
tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs

1 posted 2001-10-04 08:58 AM

Oooooo i liked this one a lot!! I liked how you formatted it and how the words swerved and curved and stuff lol..Kisses..absolutely wonderful job on this poem!

SEA

Moderator

Member Seraphic

since 2000-01-18

Posts 22676
with you

2 posted 2001-10-04 09:49 AM

yes, this is very good, just easy on the naked stuff, we have some young readers

pharon
Member

since 1999-11-13

Posts 251
alabama

3 posted 2001-10-04 10:08 AM

thanx for the responses...sorry 'bout the naked part...but i swear it wasn't sexual...it's naked as in pure...stripped of everything else...not even music anymore...just sound...but i'll be better next time

me

SEA

Moderator

Member Seraphic

since 2000-01-18

Posts 22676
with you

4 posted 2001-10-04 11:44 AM

that is very good.

I like the way you explained that. I understand naked can mean many different things in poetry, just wanted to say be careful, not meant to be mean ok?

and thank you

silvrduck
Member

since 2000-11-05

Posts 146

5 posted 2001-10-04 03:20 PM

*big smile* I love this Pharon! wow.. it's just.. sweet.

Keep posting, k?
Sarah

*the chains which once held us are only the chains which we've made*
~jewel

Alyssa

Member

since 2001-05-30

Posts 385
IM ENGAGED!!!!!

6 posted 2001-10-04 09:20 PM

whoa! this is SCHWEET
i LOVEEEEEEEEEE THIS!!!!!!

"If I made you mad today, would you still love me tomorrow?"-Incubus

Dopey Dope

Moderator

Member Patricius

since 2000-08-30

Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico

7 posted 2001-10-17 12:29 PM

Nicely done here. You are an amazing poet....very well expressed.

I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

Somewhere out there a cow is laughing at you

anonymous albert ?

Member Elite

since 2001-03-23

Posts 2979

8 posted 2001-10-17 09:47 PM

well done! your creative word format is always a pleasure to read.

=)

never_a_princess
Member

since 2001-06-09

Posts 82
Show Me the Money

9 posted 2001-10-17 10:09 PM

it's simpleish, but i like it a lot. i love the title you chose. rockin' poem.
__o0o_Anna_o0o__ *waves*

Friends are angels who lift us to our feet when our wings have trouble remembering how to fly.

fozzyozzy
Member

since 2001-03-15

Posts 336
Lessburg Virginia

10 posted 2001-10-17 11:05 PM

Pharon nicely done. This poem just "feels" right. I second Javi, you are an amazing poet.

"and Death i think is no paranthesis"-e.e. cummings

cherish
Senior Member

since 2001-03-25

Posts 1639
swimming in fairy floss...........

11 posted 2001-10-18 09:59 PM

i third you both- youre coughing up good stuff here pahron. i enjoyed this one immensely- like sugarhigh said- it curved nicely like kisses

beautiful poem buds, very nicely done indeedy. keep em coming poet!

see the glass crack like a flower opening

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