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Teen Poetry #5
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fozzyozzy
Member
since 2001-03-15
Posts 336
Lessburg Virginia

0 posted 2001-09-29 11:10 PM


How I Never Learn

Salt fills each vein
I hate to see you
see you in the rain
I don't want you to
                   have any  
                                  pain
wherever
you know  (it's gone now)
just    (happy singing)memories
  sick of being abused

you choosed
U losed  I
am not there
faces we wanna burn
face it I never learn  
to say the "right"

I make the same mistakes
  over and over and over again
what is my?
comeback?  
"baby, how ya been."

a simple staircase turn
of which I will never learn
To wear your shoes.
----------------------
Sorry if I've been a little absent.  Been trying to drop in, but school is  

"and Death i think is no paranthesis"-e.e. cummings

© Copyright 2001 Sean Michael DeFlora - All Rights Reserved
anonymousfemale
Member Elite
since 2000-02-02
Posts 2797
Limbo
1 posted 2001-09-30 01:47 PM


You have one of the most kick ass writing styles I have ever seen before in my life! This piece is fabulous.
"you choosed
U losed  I
am not there
faces we wanna burn
face it I never learn  
to say the "right""
I really enjoyed those lines because well hell, I feel exactly the same way.

Thanks for the read.  

~AF~

"Reality is only a feeble rendering of the energy brought forth by the imagination"

TopGunLauren
Senior Member
since 2000-08-02
Posts 718
California
2 posted 2001-09-30 11:41 PM


All your poems are so awsome yu have a talent for writting poetry.Keep up the great work.
  Lauren

chasing rain
Senior Member
since 2001-05-15
Posts 737
Canada
3 posted 2001-10-03 06:19 PM


SEAN!   This is incredible! I envy your talent...the format, the meaning...I especially liked the last two stanzas:


I make the same mistakes
  over and over and over again
what is my?
comeback?  
"baby, how ya been."

a simple staircase turn
of which I will never learn
To wear your shoes.

I have nothing else to say but.. You are definately one of the best poets here at pip...no joking.

»Leah«

Va pensiero sull' ali dorate...

pharon
Member
since 1999-11-13
Posts 251
alabama
4 posted 2001-10-04 03:26 AM


hey there...i haven't been here in awhile either, but glad i came back to read this one.  never cease to amaze me!  

             me

xShUgArHiGhx
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2000-09-26
Posts 3150
tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs
5 posted 2001-10-04 08:58 AM


I feel ya with the whole school thing hun..i agree!! Its nice to see a post from you though   I enjoyed this and i liked the format of it...nice job!!
Spice
Senior Member
since 2001-04-13
Posts 1266
Resting in my cardboard box.
6 posted 2001-10-20 12:08 PM


WOW!  
Incredible writing here, Sean...I loved it...Awesome style as well.
Into the library it goes...*Kisses your feet* LMAO

Every now and then I like to stick my foot in my mouth...

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