?any ideas on a name? - pipTalk Forums

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SunShine913

Member

since 2001-08-19

Posts 211
Italy but from NC

0 posted 2001-08-30 01:56 AM

I dont know when i wrote this but is was in my book that i keep my poetry in!!

I see you ....
     On rainy days
     With blue roses
     Scattered in your eyes

I smell you ....
     At darkest nights
     With uncertain shadows
     Walking past your steps

I understand you ....
     In unconscion dreams
     With shakin revelations
     Missing your grabs

I like you ....
     In such inappropriate times
     With unbeleivable zeal
     Avoiding your notice

I love you ....
     In such constant growth
     With unimaginable passion
     Renewed every passing day!

!~Andrea~!
*You only live once, so live it to the
fullest*
*what is love?*

SEA

Moderator

Member Seraphic

since 2000-01-18

Posts 22676
with you

1 posted 2001-08-30 01:59 AM

how about "In You" or easy enough just "You"
I like this very much, I like this style

very nice

by the way, I like your pic, you have a warm smile

SunShine913

Member

since 2001-08-19

Posts 211
Italy but from NC

2 posted 2001-08-30 02:04 AM

AWWWW sea thank you for the complment on my smile!!

hmm and that was some good ideas on the name thank you once again!!!

!~Andrea~!
*You only live once, so live it to the
fullest*
*what is love?*

Jenn Cirrincione

Member Elite

since 2000-07-02

Posts 2107
Fl

3 posted 2001-08-30 09:49 AM

I liked this it was cool the way it flowed. But I didn't really think "grabs" fit in. You mean like... he reached for you...? It kinda confused me. Anyway nice job!

Jenn

"Baby I've been drifting away, dreaming all day, of holding you, touching you, the only thing that I wanna do is be with you..."Faith Hill

Poet Unknown
Member

since 2001-08-14

Posts 140
Missouri

4 posted 2001-08-30 01:17 PM

well, i cant think of a title cuz i just woke up but its a good poem

Do as you please....strike forth down upon your knees...Darkness Falls on Those Without Souls

Nathan James Nugent
Junior Member

since 2001-08-31

Posts 10

5 posted 2001-08-31 12:54 PM

dont worry about titling your poetry its best to leave the words as they are free from clinging

cherish
Senior Member

since 2001-03-25

Posts 1639
swimming in fairy floss...........

6 posted 2001-08-31 01:45 AM

i loved the format you used A, i liked the way it flowed in my head- NICE

. about the title? im with sue on this one-"You" or "In You" seems perfect for it

i love your pic too! it makes me smile back at you!

............Daffodils
........Daffodils .....
....Daffodils..........
Daffodils .............

Android 17

Senior Member

since 2001-07-21

Posts 664
Winnipeg

7 posted 2001-08-31 02:09 AM

Yeah, I agree with Cherish's ideas on the title!Those would be fitting!

~ Alex

Spice
Senior Member

since 2001-04-13

Posts 1266
Resting in my cardboard box.

8 posted 2001-09-01 04:32 PM

HeHeHe, I'm with Cherish, I smile back at you as well.

ANYWAY! Nice poem, so sweet. Does your hubby have a brother? Goodness- This guy sounds too goo to be true...You just seem so happy.
And you used "Zeal" HeHeHe, I used that in the "curse the Moon" poem of mine...Haha, it was a newly discovered word for me...*Sigh* Figures other people would know it. HAHAHA... I'm so lame.
Anyway! Loved the write!

You wouldn't worry about what people thought about you if you knew how seldom they did.

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