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Teen Poetry #5
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Sabriel.s.h.lover
Member
since 2001-04-16
Posts 73
b.f.e. aka- Hickville

0 posted 2001-08-26 12:48 PM


No longer,
do I wanna be alone.
No longer,
do I wanna be un-loved.
No longer,
do I wanna cry.
All I want,
is something to be a part of.
All I want,
is someone to be there for me.
All I want,
is for him to take me high above.

stupidity should be painful
all i wanted out of u , was for sumthing u could never be, now take a real good look at what u've done 2 me!!!!!~slipknot

© Copyright 2001 Angelina - All Rights Reserved
Spice
Senior Member
since 2001-04-13
Posts 1266
Resting in my cardboard box.
1 posted 2001-08-26 01:12 PM


Hmm..Interesting ending. A.) You could be talking about a lover. Or B.) You could be talking about God. WHo knows- I liked the mystery there. HeHe... I think the poem could most definetly be lengthened. This is a really good idea. I like the change form no Longer, to All I want. Nice write. You did wonderfully.

You wouldn't worry about what people thought about you if you knew how seldom they did.

Dopey Dope
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico
2 posted 2001-09-04 12:23 PM


I liked the poem but it's very sad. I hope things get better for you.  

I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

Somewhere out there a cow is laughing at you

Jenn Cirrincione
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2000-07-02
Posts 2107
Fl
3 posted 2001-09-04 09:22 AM


I like this a lot. Short, sweet, and interesting.   Hope you find what you want.

Jenn

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