An Abhorrent Romantic Prelude

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AngelShell
Member

since 2000-03-01

Posts 446
not heaven nor hell so...

0 posted 2001-08-25 04:42 AM

~Just a quick note - This poem (which I think will one day turn into a song) is really about two specific people. The Stanzas alternate between which person I'm talking about, and the last two Stanza's are about the whole thing in general. It's a little confusing but it's just the way it came out. ~

Lost in a world of dark without you,
My face an empty chamber,
My heart a soulless pit.
It’s hard to believe I could have done this,
Could have made you turn away.

But my love always comes back to haunt me,
Whisper it’s secret in the night,
Cloud my brain and smother my spirit,
Calling its promise again.

I never should have told you,
That you were everything to me,
But the truth often hurts,
And there is no way out,
So I guess I’ll just have to live.

But it always comes back to haunt me,
Whisper it’s secret in the night,
Suffocate my life and devour my freedom,
Calling its promise again.

I guess when you love something this much,
It’s hard to just let it go,
But I’ve fought more than once,
The same outcome results,
And I don’t think I can face it again.

But my love always comes back to haunt me,
Whisper to me in the night,
Cloud my brain and smother my spirit,
Calling my heart once again.

You’d think I’d learn not to play with fire,
The very first time that I got burned,
But it’s hard to come down,
When you’re used to the high,
Therefore I guess I’ll always be addicted.

But they’ll always come back to haunt me,
Whisper their secret in the night,
Clouding my brain and suffocating my freedom,
But I’ll always believe you again.

~I haven't memorized all of the cute things to say but I'm working on it~

[This message has been edited by AngelShell (edited 08-25-2001).]

Heavens Tears

Senior Member

since 2001-03-15

Posts 677

1 posted 2001-08-25 01:08 PM

"But it always comes back to haunt me,
Whisper it’s secret in the night,
Suffocate my life and devour my freedom,
Calling its promise again."

I loved these lines. This poem was wonderful, and I can honestly say I can relate to it. Great job!

*If you can't stand for something, you'll fall for anything.*

Spice
Senior Member

since 2001-04-13

Posts 1266
Resting in my cardboard box.

2 posted 2001-08-25 10:34 PM

HeHe- Nice critique message.
Okay Anyway- Ya, Wow! Loved the poem. The last line of the whole thing ecpsecially. I have a feeling alot of people will be able ot relate to this one. You did an outstanding job here. Kudos!

You wouldn't worry about what people thought about you if you knew how seldom they did.

Dopey Dope

Moderator

Member Patricius

since 2000-08-30

Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico

3 posted 2001-09-03 02:19 AM

Well done here. I enjoyed the poem.

I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

Somewhere out there a cow is laughing at you

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