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Teen Poetry #5
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paladin
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since 2001-08-05
Posts 930
Pensacola,Fl.

0 posted 2001-08-13 01:34 PM


Whine about how
it ain't fair.
Neurotic obsession
with suicide.
Booming rap songs
hatred trapped inside.
Scream about how
your elders are blind.
Yet you ignore your
own narrow mind.
You want your freedom?
Then pay your dues.
Open up your selfs
to anothers heart.
Growing ain't easy
with out any clues.
Try a little open mindness.
Now that is really smart.

paladin

© Copyright 2001 Robert E. Jackson - All Rights Reserved
Allysa
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since 1999-11-09
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In an upside-down garden
1 posted 2001-08-13 01:45 PM


Great poem.  It's the truth, totally.  People need to stop whining about everything.  But it's not only teenagers who whine.  Adults do too.  Anyways, bye.

Someone once taught me that it doesn't matter what other people think of you as long as you like yourself.  That's what I live by.

SEA
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Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676
with you
2 posted 2001-08-13 02:32 PM


hey! I don't whine.....
ok, only when I reaaallllly want something LOL
no, really, this is awesome  

keoni
Senior Member
since 2000-10-16
Posts 850
Up in the mountains in the NFC
3 posted 2001-08-13 04:05 PM


I liked this, but I agree with Alyssa. It's not just teens that whine, everyone does. I think people make a big deal of teens whining because we all whine about the same thing. If we are all whining about the same thing, shouldn't that make everyone else wonder why we're whining? Maybe there's actually some validity behind our whining. At least sometimes...
Jon

"Your anger is a gift"-Rage Against The Machine
"Only God can judge me" Tupac Shakur

Fading Away
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Posts 3131
Lynchburg, Virginia
4 posted 2001-08-14 04:08 PM


I liked this, although I don't quite agree.  Not all teens are like this... and not just teens are whiny.  If this is society's views on teens, then we should be the ones to prove them wrong.

--Marie

You think yourself a failure, but perhaps the biggest loss is winning.

Allysa
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since 1999-11-09
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In an upside-down garden
5 posted 2001-08-14 07:34 PM


Finally someone agrees with me on something!
I asked my uncle what he does (he works at a computer company thing) and he said that he listens to adults whine to him about their every little problem.  I told him that he should just say to them "I'm not paid to listen to you whine, that's not why I came to work here" or something.  I only whine when I want something really really bad and it can't wait.  Or if I need to go somewhere, since I can't drive yet.  But a lot of adults I know can get whatever they want and can drive, so I dunno waht their problem is.

Someone once taught me that it doesn't matter what other people think of you as long as you like yourself.  That's what I live by.

Ina
Senior Member
since 2000-10-09
Posts 1236
Quebec, Canada
6 posted 2001-08-15 12:20 PM


we all whine...its life. I dont think its an obession with suicide, its more a chemical imbalance in the brain or the easy way out, but i wont preach cuz that would make me a hypocryte. good poem anyways. nice straight to the point opinon.

Regina

Spice
Senior Member
since 2001-04-13
Posts 1266
Resting in my cardboard box.
7 posted 2001-08-15 10:33 PM


Ditto to everyone else.  
BUT! I liked the way you wrote this.
Very well done.  

You wouldn't worry about what people thought about you if you knew how seldom they did.

fearing-laughter
Senior Member
since 2001-04-24
Posts 605
land of cheese (Wisconsin)
8 posted 2001-08-17 04:50 AM


judge not less ye be judged yourself.
sorry this poem really pissed me off.  i guess im an angry teenager, haha. adults these days have no idea what it's actually like to be a teenager in this time period. my mom tells me everyday "you should of lived when I was a teenager!"  well how are we supposed to know?! damn us for being born 15 years ago instead of forty.  that's all i have to say about that...lol.  honestly i think this is a good poem.  the writing technique and stuff. even if i don't agree with it's message.  decent post.
-fear-

i'm a penguin! i'm a penguin! i'm a cute lil penguiiiin! i'm a penguin i'm a penguin! i eat FISH!--tis the pretty penguin song

[This message has been edited by fearing-laughter (edited 08-17-2001).]

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