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Teen Poetry #5
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TopGunLauren
Senior Member
since 2000-08-02
Posts 718
California

0 posted 2001-08-05 03:32 AM


I look up in the sky I see black instaed of blue
The path I'm walking down is ending I don't know what to do.

In my heart and soul the pain I can not bare
Everyone Is staring at me but for some reason I don't care.

All I want is for this terrible nightmare to end
So the holes in my heart will be able to heal and be able to mend.

I'm stuck in this never ending circle there is no way out
A circle filled with sorrow a circle filled with doubt.

My whole life is pretty much one huge blur
Because of all the sad situations and pain I've had to indure.

Everything in my life has left me in confusion, even though I don't want to die
Because no matter how bad things get I'm not ready to say goodbye!

    Lauren



© Copyright 2001 TopGunLauren - All Rights Reserved
Shygirl82
Member
since 2001-02-19
Posts 245
Ilinois
1 posted 2001-08-05 04:40 AM


This was great..then ending was very strong and had a hopeful sound to it.  Sounds like you have been some rough stuff lately..but you are gonna stick around and meet it eye to eye..just what I like to hear   Hope things get better for you SOON and good luck to ya!
~Nikki~

Smile!!  You never know who may be falling in love with it...

Fading Away
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2001-03-14
Posts 3131
Lynchburg, Virginia
2 posted 2001-08-05 05:05 PM


VERY nice message.  The last couplet was my favorite... I'm glad that you feel that way.  I wish everyone did.  Nicely written here.  I really enjoyed this one.  Keep posting all your work!

--Marie

You think yourself a failure, but perhaps the biggest loss is winning.

anonymous albert ?
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2001-03-23
Posts 2979

3 posted 2001-08-05 10:25 PM


inspiring message...the piece overall was emotion packed...sincere thoughts...as well...i liked it, Lauren.

if i die before i wake...i pray the Lord my soul to take - when thugs cry-

Dopey Dope
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico
4 posted 2001-08-07 10:55 PM


I thought the poem had a great, and wonderful message that should be followed by many. Well done.  

I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

Somewhere out there a cow is laughing at you

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