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Teen Poetry #5
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Tamma
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since 2000-01-17
Posts 794
In His Arms, Harpers Ferry, WV

0 posted 2001-08-02 10:20 PM


Promises made,
Promises broken,
Along with the heart,
Of the innocent.

She was so young,
And so beautiful,
But they all left her,
In tears.

She was so loving,
But now she's so cold,
For she can't love now,
For all the hurt.

Promises made,
Promises broken,
Along with the heart,
Of the innocent.

"A friend's shoulder makes a
nice pillow when you're crying" ~Me
"If beauty is in the eye of the beholder, I guess love is too" ~Me

© Copyright 2001 Tamma M. Wilson - All Rights Reserved
Jessica
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Member
since 2001-06-28
Posts 350
South AL
1 posted 2001-08-02 11:14 PM


Tamma ~ Wonderful poem. I can relate to this so much. Probably in a diffrent way, but I loved it.   Great job here!!  

What don't kill you can only make you stronger...

Love you, Adam!! :)

Shygirl82
Member
since 2001-02-19
Posts 245
Ilinois
2 posted 2001-08-03 02:58 AM


Tamma-great read here.  It was very emotion filled and quite beautifully expressed.  Thanks for sharing!
~Nikki~

Smile!!  You never know who may be falling in love with it...

Dopey Dope
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Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico
3 posted 2001-08-03 04:02 AM


This is pretty sad....I really liked it though. Very nicely done.  

I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

Somewhere out there a cow is laughing at you

Jenn Cirrincione
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Member Elite
since 2000-07-02
Posts 2107
Fl
4 posted 2001-08-03 11:23 AM


Yes, this is quite sad... but I liked the way you wrote it.. the repitions added to it. Good job here...

Jenn

"Baby I've been drifting away, dreaming all day, of holding you, touching you, the only thing that I wanna do is be with you..."Faith Hill

Heavens Tears
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Posts 677

5 posted 2001-08-03 03:14 PM


This was a wonderful poem.  I especially like the repeated stanza.  It was very sad, but I still liked it a lot.
Fading Away
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since 2001-03-14
Posts 3131
Lynchburg, Virginia
6 posted 2001-08-04 05:32 PM


This is sad.  I really liked the way you repeated the first stanza to end the poem.  Nicely done!  I really enjoyed this.

--Marie

You think yourself a failure, but perhaps the biggest loss is winning.

Kicking Kim
Member
since 2001-04-16
Posts 426
Cloud Cucko Land!
7 posted 2001-08-09 07:54 PM


I am really loving your work, this is the 3rd poem now and the are just getting better.  You should be very proud because you are a very talented poet!!  This was another great read Tam!!  

^*~Kicking Kim~*^  

Delirious_Smurf
Member
since 2001-08-08
Posts 90
Nothingness,P.R.
8 posted 2001-08-09 08:04 PM


I liked very much...specially the part they  left ther in tears...eeek so sad, but good

sean mani
Junior Member
since 2001-08-06
Posts 27

9 posted 2001-08-09 11:19 PM


very well written...hope to see more posts from u...meanwhile...check out my poems 'september 29' and 'revelation to december'

sean

Starnite
Junior Member
since 2001-07-05
Posts 41
Wisconsin
10 posted 2001-08-10 12:19 PM


Hey that was great I can relate to that all the way.  Hope to read more!!

**Sarah

LoneWolf
Member
since 2001-03-10
Posts 384
IL
11 posted 2001-08-10 02:22 PM


i really like this one, it was sad though. but still great job here

It's too bad I'm not as wonderful a person as people say I am, because the world could use a few people like that.
I've learned that even when you th

katherine
Member
since 2000-06-10
Posts 365
Canberra Australia
12 posted 2001-08-10 11:50 PM


this is so sad *comes down from high*
i loved this one it's really good.

katie

"by takeing no risks you are really risking everything"
Vic's RE book

Allysa
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since 1999-11-09
Posts 1952
In an upside-down garden
13 posted 2001-08-11 12:40 PM


Tamma, this is great!  Sad, but totally awesome! Keep it up!  

Someone once taught me that it doesn't matter what other people think of you as long as you like yourself.  That's what I live by.

California Rockstar
Junior Member
since 2001-08-09
Posts 13
State of Confusion
14 posted 2001-08-11 05:59 PM


I just had the last year of my life jump out at me from your poem. BRAVO! I loved it!

If practice makes perfect, but noboy's perfect, why bother?

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