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Teen Poetry #5
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Daphny's Everything
| Teen Poetry #5 |
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Daphny's Everything |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico 
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NOTE: this one is weird. Daphny's Everything: Daphny sheds her lizard skin to the floor. Her reptile antics seem to portray A bed ridden man at the best of times. Her quilted green eyes dance from side to side Thinking which fly she's going to eat next. Saliva glistens within false lighting That seems to be coming from a cracked wall. She approaches cautiously and stands still. The light suddenly flickers rapidly And fear breaks loose within Daphny's cold heart. Slowly she backs away from the crevice And falls upon her molted, lizard skin. A flash of light blinds her sight of the world. She tries to break away from the past skin But ends up tangling her neck around it. Her breath slowly escapes for the last time, And she dies by the wall that caught her eye. Daphny, the lizard, sheds her everything, And her everything sheds her forever.  I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. |
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| © Copyright 2001 Pepe de la Muerte - All Rights Reserved | |||
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chasing rain Senior Member
since 2001-05-15
Posts 737Canada |
DID YOU HAVE TO KILL HER!?  Ah well... *sob* heh. anyway, it was different in a way...but it all made sense (a good thing). I liked the ending, which was confusing at first. You had a good description of the lizard though. Good job!  -Leah Va pensiero sull' ali dorate... |
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fozzyozzy Member
since 2001-03-15
Posts 336Lessburg Virginia |
The first time I read it, i thought "cute, it's about a lizard." Then i reread and got the message. Deep in my opinion. I liked it a lot. Great job as always. "and Death i think is no paranthesis"-e.e. cummings |
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stace_co2003 Member
since 2001-03-30
Posts 497In a dream world |
I think I actually got this one without you explaining it to me. I read through it at least 5 times to make sure I knew what I was talking about when I replied. It may just be the way I interpret it, but it seems to me that you are speaking of a past that just wont let go, and ultimatly kills you. but the wall, I didn't understand it. and the flash of light...over my head. *sighs* and here I was thinking I got it. oh well, it's great Jav. Wonderful really. I LOVE ZU, hey Albie, Cody, Allan, Carly, Cherish, Lizzy, Kris, *HUGS JAVI*, Tamma, Acire, and Branden. *HUGS ZU* [This message has been edited by stace_co2003 (edited 07-29-2001).] |
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Wicced_Witch Member
since 2000-02-06
Posts 110Clarksville, TN, USA |
You are still writing some of the best poems I have ever read...The message portrayed in a way very different than most of the writing I have seen. I've really missed that while I've been gone. Keep up the good job, looking forward to catching up on your older work. |
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Ina Senior Member
since 2000-10-09
Posts 1236Quebec, Canada |
Well this was really good Javier. just a little weird. but really intersting. Regina |
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Isabel Galaxia Senior Member
since 2000-06-18
Posts 733 |
Oh boy. That was a weird one.  Bel |
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angel_2401 Member
since 2001-06-12
Posts 131Cincinnati, OH |
This is good. and it was a bit weird, when I first read it.. lol. But this is good. I've only seen a few of your poems, and I want to see more!!! Kristin I don't have an attitude problem You have a perception problem. |
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Low Man's Lyric Member
since 2001-04-03
Posts 236In a dream |
lol odd! but very creative thinking there Dopey. I enjoyed this poem and hope to see more. "Right now I'm having amnesia and deja vu at the same time. I think I've forgotten this before." |
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Shygirl82 Member
since 2001-02-19
Posts 245Ilinois |
This is quite the creative poem here...some of the stuff you write truly does amaze me. Excellent piece...Thanks for sharing! ~Nikki~ It takes only a minute to like someone, a hour to love someone, but a lifetime to forget them. |
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anonymousfemale Member Elite
since 2000-02-02
Posts 2797Limbo |
Very nice, Javier. The symbolism behind this is exceptional. If it is about what I think it is, you have done a very good job of explaining it. Sometimes though, it's the cold heart that keeps us alive. ~AF~ "Reality is just a crutch for people who can't cope with drugs." -- Robin Williams |
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allie Member
since 2001-07-09
Posts 218Australia |
And falls upon her molted, lizard skin. Really nice line... Infact the whole piece was really really good... interesting... ALLIE |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
Funny how nobody has delved within the poem or ask what it's about. Well it's about hypocrisy....symbolism is there.....kinda deep. That's why the poem is weird. Thanks for reading everybody! |
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Spice Senior Member
since 2001-04-13
Posts 1266Resting in my cardboard box. |
First off... I hope you feel INCREDIBLY special, Deary!!! I saved my 2000th post JUST for you. (Tell me I'm not the greatest- just TRY!) HeHeHe... ANYWAY! The poem. I actually found it to be QUITE interesting. The symbolism of the lizard and her skin was very well played up. I liked it. As for the meaning- I'm kinda leaning towards Stace's view on it. How in the end her past kills her cause she never TRUELLY let it go.. And the light- Well I'm REALLY not sure about the light..BUT I do have a few views on it. One of which would be...naaa...nevermind. I think I'll spare myself the total embarassment of being wrong. HeHeHe But ya- An extremely indepth look into this would be nice Javi- Please, share with me your wisdom. HaHa.Seriously though- The light thing is bugging me! HeHe! I gotta know! ANYWAY! Off I go. When you give me the menaing of all this I surely will be back though. I enjoyed this bunches, Javi. As always. More I say! |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
Daphny's Everything: Daphny sheds her lizard skin to the floor.= If you pay close attention to all my pieces then you should realize that anytime I use a reptile in my work it symbolizes HYPOCRISY. I use reptiles to symbolize hypocrisy because of their cold blooded nature and the way they shed their skin, much like a hypocrit acts nicely in front of you, but then sheds that to be their true cold hearted being. So this line says that she sheds her skin to the floor. She sheds down her outer being, or her false being... Her reptile antics seem to portray A bed ridden man at the best of times.= By this I mean that her mannerisms look like a bed ridden man at the best of time, and bed ridden men don't look too good regardless of the time. The Bed Ridden Man also symbolizes the possibilities of what could happen to her if she continues to be a hypocrit. She could become bed ridden and useless with time. Her quilted green eyes dance from side to side Thinking which fly she's going to eat next.= The Quilted eye part basically symbolizes the fact that her soul is fake. The eyes are said to be a window to the soul, but these eyes are quilted, thus hand or machine made. The flies basically symbolize people and how she views them to be. Petty things to simply consume for one's pleasure. Saliva glistens within false lighting That seems to be coming from a cracked wall.= Her Saliva kinda shines with the fake lighting which symbolizes her fake TRUTH (light=truth). The cracked wall symbolizes her LIFE. So this fake truth is coming from this cracked life. She approaches cautiously and stands still. The light suddenly flickers rapidly And fear breaks loose within Daphny's cold heart.= She is drawn by the light and draws near the wall and stands there. The light(truth) kind of pulses rapidly and she gets scared. Slowly she backs away from the crevice And falls upon her molted, lizard skin.= She backs away and trips on the molted skin that she shedded in the first verse. The skin that was laid on the floor symbolizes her PAST. A flash of light blinds her sight of the world.= The false light due to the flickering suddenly became True light. It blinds her sight of what she thought was reality. She tries to break away from the past skin But ends up tangling her neck around it.= She tries to break away from the past since she's finally realized the truth, that she was living fake, but she ends up getting tangled up in the past. She was through with the past, but the past wasn't through with her. Her breath slowly escapes for the last time, And she dies by the wall that caught her eye.= She dies next to her wall of life. Pretty sad if you ask me. Daphny, the lizard, sheds her everything, And her everything sheds her forever.= This is just saying that she shedded her everything in the end, but it was her everything that got the best of her and shedded HER for all of eternity, thus her death occurring. So that's basically it guys.....glad you read. I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. |
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anonymous albert ?
since 2001-03-23
Posts 2979 |
amazing symbolism, as usual...that explanation was VERY helpful..haha...i love the way your pieces...though provoke...awesome job on another piece of yours, Javi...i enjoyed it greatly. "if i die before i wake...i pray the Lord my soul to take" - when thugs cry- |
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Fading Away
since 2001-03-14
Posts 3131Lynchburg, Virginia |
Very thought provoking piece. I read it through a few times, and didn't understand it, what you were portraying was confusing. Your explination was more than helpful. To be honest, I didn't like this one. I thought that the symbolism wasn't very clear, and the way you adressed the topic wasn't the best way. I think you've written better. Thanks for the read, though. --Marie You think yourself a failure, but perhaps the biggest loss is winning. |
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Child of the Stars
since 2000-09-07
Posts 1658Ann Arbor, MI |
You didn't want me to reply, because, apparently, I suck,  but I forgive you brudder...its YOU that sucks.  Hehe...nah...I loved this poem the first time and I love it now. Tis strange...an accurate depiction of the artist. Love you man.~Carly Speak softly and carry a beagle. |
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Crash&Burn Member
since 2001-01-18
Posts 119 |
you and your simbolism. It was nice Javier, I like it but this poem like almost every other poem you've writing based on a girl or woman, is related with the same girl or so I think, because maybe I interpreted it wrong. There are alot more women around you *looks around at the empty room* well maybe not now. I'll see you around mate.  I see the darkness coming all is bleak... |
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keoni Senior Member
since 2000-10-16
Posts 850Up in the mountains in the NFC |
Dopey, I liked it. The symbolism was great. I could see my life's Daphny as I was reading it. Nice one Jon "Your anger is a gift"-Rage Against The Machine |
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Heavens Tears
since 2001-03-15
Posts 677 |
This was interesting. I did not like it as much as some of your others, but it was OK. |
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Kicking Kim Member
since 2001-04-16
Posts 426Cloud Cucko Land! |
Wow, this poem rocked I loved the emotion and I also liked the fact that it was weird, afterall not all poems have to be stereotype and straight to the point!! Interesting, intriguing and inspiring!!  ^*~Kicking Kim~*^  "Theres no posession, just obsession and growing depression" |
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obscurity of cloud Member
since 2001-05-11
Posts 294....:::::******:::::.... |
Mon Dieu, Javier, what can i say? This has so many different levels...for one, the name you chose is somehow incredibly appropriate. The sound of it creates a sense of where you're going with this. I loved the reptile symbolism. I almost wish you hadn't gone and explained it all...i read the beginning of your explanation and decided to skip it until after writing this. I mean, maybe i just have a weird sense of understanding of your words, but i wasn't very confused at all, and i certainly did not think it was in the least bit weird. I especially like the sound of "sheds her everything." Tan poetic, bravo. Library, naturlich. "so when at times the mob is swayed to carry praise or blame too far, we may choose something like a star" --Frost |
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cherish Senior Member
since 2001-03-25
Posts 1639swimming in fairy floss........... |
You know, for once i was sumwhere near the mark on this poem wasnt i?..hahah..you're too polite to tell me when ive totally lost it..you shouldnt do that you know! but yeah i enjoyed it the second time round just as much groovy chic..i love the way your mind works with this one..the symbolisim is great..not to mention imaginative. im in love with the last line too..but sumthing which i didnt like was this line: "Thinking which fly she's going to eat next" not cuz of the content, but because it threw the flow off a bit- i think the word "thinking" is the main culprit for that ..its just a little itty bitty thing...but then again maybe its just me. good poem javier...you know i liked it "Killer in me is a killer in you, my love |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
Wow, I think this rocks. You've all come up with your honest opinions. Some of you disliked it, some of you thought it was fine, and some loved it. I really loved that diverse opinion because it shows me you're all being honest. To all those who thought it was ok- I agree hehe To all those who loved it- hey thanks! It's better than I thought it'd be! You are all apreciated to the fullest. It pleases me to hear I inspire or that a poem of mine meant a little something more than just a poem for you.  To those who disliked it- yes the symbolism might be a bit iffy. I know. It's not as clear as some other symbolism i've used, but I felt a need to be a bit more cryptic in this poem than others. Apparently some people DID get it  hehe but anyway.....I thank you for your honesty. |
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punkrockerrobin
since 2001-05-15
Posts 1180Sparks, NV |
hey hun! i kinda got lost in this poem but hey i get lost in a lot of things lol. i like your new pic on here. hehe! oh my.........anywho i gots to go great poem talk to ya later.love ya! robin i don't give up without a fight so boys beware! |
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