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Teen Poetry #5
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It's Ok
| Teen Poetry #5 |
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It's Ok |
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MoeRocko Member
since 2001-04-25
Posts 166West Virginia |
You hit me, you use my emotions against me You smash all that is me with only words then when you think it's not enough physical domination satisfies your urge But it's ok that you can't accept what you are It's ok that you don't like what you've become Is it my fault that you make mistakes? Or are you jealous that I'm not that dumb It's ok that my suffering gives you peace of mind You couldn't tell if someone did love you you are so blind. It's ok because what you sow, you will reap It's ok because you think I'm the weak sheep It's ok because I know where you sleep... "Nothing will stop me, and whether I'm here or wherever I may be, I'll always have the same feelings, I'll say what I feel." ~Lennon |
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Spice Senior Member
since 2001-04-13
Posts 1266Resting in my cardboard box. |
Whoa! *Blown away by the last line* Haha- I LOVED this. Nothing more to say! INTO THE LIBRARY!  |
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katherine Member
since 2000-06-10
Posts 365Canberra Australia |
This is AWESOME! WOW! katie "by takeing no risks you are really risking everything" |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
LMAO that ending completely rocked! Haha woah....talk about powerful. I REALLY enjoyed this one. I oughta give this to a few people on my poo list.  I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. |
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never_a_princess Member
since 2001-06-09
Posts 82Show Me the Money |
Heya Ewokz..*hmm* what shall I say? good poem..*likes* 'Specially the last stanza. anyways...*drops the nice act* :P J/k...maybe.. __o0o_Anna_o0o__ *waves* |
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Jessica
since 2001-06-28
Posts 350South AL |
Into the library it goes  Great writing  What don't kill you can only make you stronger... |
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Wicced_Witch Member
since 2000-02-06
Posts 110Clarksville, TN, USA |
Wow, that ending was a real twist. I loved it. |
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mistic Member
since 2001-05-06
Posts 233Idaho, U.S.A. |
I really liked the raw emotion in this one. great job |
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anonymousfemale Member Elite
since 2000-02-02
Posts 2797Limbo |
If you know where they sleep go out and seek revenge.  Just to echo everyone else, Yup, that ending kicked major ass!!  You've expressed yourself really well and written some true emotions in this. Good job. ~AF~ "Reality is just a crutch for people who can't cope with drugs." -- Robin Williams |
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Kevin
since 1999-11-02
Posts 729Torrington, Ct, Usa |
this is great writing... i saw that end coming all the way... i guess the image i get from reading this is the person is talking about a parent... maybe thats just where im taking it but the last line kind of cemented it for me i hope this is fictional but if its not im sorry [This message has been edited by Kevin (edited 07-31-2001).] |
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MoeRocko Member
since 2001-04-25
Posts 166West Virginia |
Haha, be assured this IS fictional. I just wanted to write something a little different...  "Nothing will stop me, and whether I'm here or wherever I may be, I'll always have the same feelings, I'll say what I feel." ~Lennon |
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Shygirl82 Member
since 2001-02-19
Posts 245Ilinois |
Wow this was great!!! I loved the last stanza "It's ok that my suffering gives you peace of mind You couldn't tell if someone did love you you are so blind. It's ok because what you sow, you will reap It's ok because you think I'm the weak sheep It's ok because I know where you sleep..." I was so totally feeling this part...Excellent write!!!! ~Nikki~ It takes only a minute to like someone, a hour to love someone, but a lifetime to forget them. |
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Low Man's Lyric Member
since 2001-04-03
Posts 236In a dream |
Great just great, its nice to see something different. Good job and of course like everyone said, I realy like the ending. "Right now I'm having amnesia and deja vu at the same time. I think I've forgotten this before." |
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anonymous albert ?
since 2001-03-23
Posts 2979 |
the ending def. was a surprise...the whole poem was well expressed...powerful...loved this piece if i die before i wake...i pray the Lord my soul to take |
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Fading Away
since 2001-03-14
Posts 3131Lynchburg, Virginia |
Very powerful here! I LOVED the last line! Haha.. awesome work. I really enjoyed this! --Marie You think yourself a failure, but perhaps the biggest loss is winning. |
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