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Teen Poetry #5
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Shattered Mirror of a Dream
| Teen Poetry #5 |
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Shattered Mirror of a Dream |
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Kosetsu Member
since 2001-03-10
Posts 450Alabama, USA |
Torn from sleep’s Chaotic serenity, The scent of you, Here no more, Like a fading memory. The impression Of your face Pressed upon your pillow’s silk, I awaken, Torn from sleep’s Endless dreamless insomnia Sleepless nightfalls, Fall once more, Bringing on amnesia, You’re gone again, Can’t you see, How you tangle me in webs? I awaken, Torn from sleep’s Shattered mirror of a dream. "Eat, drink, and be merry, for tomorrow we die." - Shakespeare |
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| © Copyright 2001 Adam Kamerer - All Rights Reserved | |||
Linc
since 2001-03-07
Posts 552The Backstreet Boy |
Hey, Adam, now I don’t reply to a lot of your work, mostly because I don’t see it. But when I do have the privilege to read such excellent work I am never surprised. All of your work that I have read is beyond wonderful or great or even superb. It’s simply masterful; I thoroughly enjoy reading it and most always put it in my library. I truly hope you continue to give us the privilege to read your masterful work. Until then -- Linc "Blood Moon" |
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Kosetsu Member
since 2001-03-10
Posts 450Alabama, USA |
Woo...wasn't expecting that. I actually don't like this as much as some of my others. It's good, but it still seems like its missing something. Or maybe its got something it doesn't need...I dunno, that makes no sense. Anyway, thanks for the kind words Linc; I don't intend to stop any time soon. -Kosetsu, eating some o' his momma's special strawberry pie. "Eat, drink, and be merry, for tomorrow we die." - Shakespeare |
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anonymous albert ?
since 2001-03-23
Posts 2979 |
wow...this was VERY well written...i REALLY liked it, Adam  ...this was quite deep...my fav from you so far...enjoyed greatly...bye  [This message has been edited by anonymous albert ? (edited 07-19-2001).] |
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Spice Senior Member
since 2001-04-13
Posts 1266Resting in my cardboard box. |
Okay.... I replied to this...and for some ODD reason it didn't show up. GRrrr Oh well- I'll try and remember what I said.  *Waits patiently for her bite of Strawberry Pie* Well...like I said earlier ( Though you wouldn't know- would you?) There is something about this that I'm totally lovin'. Can't wait till your next piece. |
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cherish Senior Member
since 2001-03-25
Posts 1639swimming in fairy floss........... |
Kosetsu, you really did do very well with this one..i felt the emotions and images runing through me as vividly as it were written....all i can say is that i love every bit of it...very good write!! |
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Kosetsu Member
since 2001-03-10
Posts 450Alabama, USA |
Hey people, Thanks for the comments everyone! *gives Spice some o' the Strawberry pie* it be's good, if ya'll know what I'm talkin bout. "Eat, drink, and be merry, for tomorrow we die." - Shakespeare |
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Fading Away
since 2001-03-14
Posts 3131Lynchburg, Virginia |
This is an excellent piece... some of your late work has really surprised me. Wonderful writing. I am really enjoying all your poetry. Thanks for sharing, and keep posting all your work. --Marie You think yourself a failure, but perhaps the biggest loss is winning. |
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Kosetsu Member
since 2001-03-10
Posts 450Alabama, USA |
I think one reason why my work seems to be a bit better is because I'm spending more time on these poems. Thinking them through a bit more, and putting more work into finding new words to use for them. Before, I would just slap down some words that rhymed and had similar syllable structure. Then again, all of these have been inspired by Stereomud, Incubus, and Linkin Park songs. Maybe that has something to do with it... -Kosetsu "Eat, drink, and be merry, for tomorrow we die." - Shakespeare |
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katherine Member
since 2000-06-10
Posts 365Canberra Australia |
this is awesome.wow! i loved this i thought it was so good. well done. katie fate can only take you so far, the rest is up to you |
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Raven Skye Member
since 2001-03-03
Posts 112.In a House. |
Good job! This was an interesting poem. I understand how you feel about getting inspiration from Linkin Park and Incubus. If I don't have something in my life going on to write about I listen to them and I'll find something to write about. This poem was really good though. GOOD JOB!! hehe *×´¨`·.×*Raven Skye*×´¨`·.×* |
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Ina Senior Member
since 2000-10-09
Posts 1236Quebec, Canada |
Incubus and linkin park, are very good inspires in my opinion. They deal with lots of things... well this was smiply amazing, keep it up. Regina |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
Well done here! I liked this one. A bit of duality within the poem. I thought it was written fine.  I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. |
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Jessica
since 2001-06-28
Posts 350South AL |
Adam - I was totally liking this. Very good decription still it was very, hmmm - what's a good word?, unique, masterful, deep, plotted?, oh okay... I'll shut-up! Great piece!   *hugs* Love ya!What don't kill you can only make you stronger... |
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anonymousfemale Member Elite
since 2000-02-02
Posts 2797Limbo |
Adam this is great! I like this one the best out of all your work. The format is really simple but you execute it very well. The imagery is fabulous and you should be very proud of it. Well done. ~AF~ "Reality is just a crutch for people who can't cope with drugs." -- Robin Williams |
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