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Kevin

Senior Member

since 1999-11-02

Posts 729
Torrington, Ct, Usa

0 posted 2001-07-19 11:13 AM

Don’t wait for the siren
You’re First on the scene
Already cryin’
[edited] drama queen
You’re pointing your finger
And all in my face
You constantly linger;
Put me in my place
You’ve nothing to hide?
Then go look in the mirror
When you look from outside
Things can be so much clearer
So stop looking down
And get off of your thrown
You should throw out that crown
Instead of your stones

[This message has been edited by acire (edited 07-19-2001).]

keoni
Senior Member

since 2000-10-16

Posts 850
Up in the mountains in the NFC

1 posted 2001-07-19 11:41 AM

Nice man. I know a few people I'd like to give this to. Doesn't it just feel good when you're done writing a poem like this, you can just take a deep breath and be like "Ah, that's what you deserve" I liked this one.
Jon

"Your anger is a gift"-Rage Against The Machine
"Only God can judge me" Tupac Shakur

[This message has been edited by keoni (edited 07-19-2001).]

Raven Skye
Member

since 2001-03-03

Posts 112
.In a House.

2 posted 2001-07-19 11:42 AM

Good job venting! I hope things get better for you

*×´¨`·.×*Raven Skye*×´¨`·.×*
Don't just trust yourself,
learn what parts of yourself to trust.

CwboyAtHeart
Senior Member

since 2001-04-14

Posts 541
Selah, WA, USA

3 posted 2001-07-19 02:36 PM

I liked this one. Simple, but I could feel power in it. Enjoyed reading it.

      - Cody -

Note To Self:  If Pigs Can Fly, So Can I!!!

If someboy laughs at me, does that make me funny or just plain stupid?

Shygirl82
Member

since 2001-02-19

Posts 245
Ilinois

4 posted 2001-07-19 06:26 PM

Whew...I could feel the emotions in this one. This was a good vent...it feels good to get it out doesnt it? This was very powerful. Thanks for sharing!
~Nikki~

It takes only a minute to like someone, a hour to love someone, but a lifetime to forget them.

Acies

Moderator

Member Rara Avis

since 2000-06-07

Posts 7665
Twilight Zone

5 posted 2001-07-19 10:31 PM

It's nice to let things out once in a while.
That's good, just don't act stupid about it.
Writing it in poetry is a great release for it.
keep it up.

hi Sweets, Lizzy, Kris, Ina, Erin, Erica, Minna, Kit, Kamie, Javi, Jenn, Sharon, Nan, Cawlee, Cherish, Ashley, Sara, Justine, Leah, Jess, Kimmie, Mare

Fading Away

Member Elite

since 2001-03-14

Posts 3131
Lynchburg, Virginia

6 posted 2001-07-19 11:07 PM

This is one awesome poem. It's very intense.. A good let-out of emotions and anger is always healthy. Keep writing about it, it helps. Hope to see more soon.. I really enjoyed this.

--Marie

You think yourself a failure, but perhaps the biggest loss is winning.

cherish
Senior Member

since 2001-03-25

Posts 1639
swimming in fairy floss...........

7 posted 2001-07-19 11:15 PM

this was a really good poem kevin...i loved this part;
When you look from outside
Things can be so much clearer
this is so true..i loved this line...thanks for sharing

anonymous albert ?

Member Elite

since 2001-03-23

Posts 2979

8 posted 2001-07-20 12:12 PM

nice vent...i enjoyed the read, Kevin

im addicted to passions in poetry!...are you?

Spice
Senior Member

since 2001-04-13

Posts 1266
Resting in my cardboard box.

9 posted 2001-07-20 02:45 AM

Hell ya...I loved this one.
The whole time I was reading it I had the lil head-jiving thing goin'. HaHa
Filled with Attitude.
Wonderful write!!!

katherine
Member

since 2000-06-10

Posts 365
Canberra Australia

10 posted 2001-07-20 06:29 AM

good venting there. bet it feels good to get that all out. I know the perfect person to give that to.
katie

fate can only take you so far, the rest is up to you

Ina
Senior Member

since 2000-10-09

Posts 1236
Quebec, Canada

11 posted 2001-07-20 11:21 AM

Great vent poem, could way to scream without hurting your voice.

Regina

a.k.a.maLa
Junior Member

since 2001-06-08

Posts 15
Florida, USA

12 posted 2001-07-20 11:40 AM

This was terrible. It needs a lot of work. You could be a great writer someday if you stop trying to make everything a new hate anthem as screamed by Fred Durst. Sorry, but to be honest, it was not great poetry. There's a lot of potential though.

Kevin

Senior Member

since 1999-11-02

Posts 729
Torrington, Ct, Usa

13 posted 2001-07-20 11:46 AM

on second thought...i dont have to defend myself to destructive criticism...

edited

[This message has been edited by Kevin (edited 07-20-2001).]

Dopey Dope

Moderator

Member Patricius

since 2000-08-30

Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico

14 posted 2001-07-25 02:58 AM

Very mature of you Kevin. Ouch, that comment was pretty blunt. I would encourage the person who wrote that to keep in mind that if we are going to display a negative feeling towards the poem we should display it in a form to encourage the writer to better him/herself......
Oh well, I thought that this one lacked a bit of power like most of your poems have. The title says it all though, it pretty much says what this is all about.
I thought it was pretty ok, but I am used to having high standards for your work because I love it

I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

Somewhere out there a cow is laughing at you

Knight of Secrecy
Member

since 2001-10-12

Posts 113
San Juan, Puerto Rico

15 posted 2001-11-08 04:21 PM

Great poem.
-C.M.

Honey
Member

since 2001-10-09

Posts 92
Hot girl From Canada

16 posted 2001-11-08 04:56 PM

Wow! This poem was great. It seems as though you got all your anger out in this peice. keep up the good work and keep smiling

It Feels As If I've Always Been Someone On The Outside Looking In.

He Who Laughs Last Thinks Slowest!!

vixengrl04
Member

since 2001-04-26

Posts 495
East Haddam, CT

17 posted 2001-11-08 05:17 PM

It's good 2 vent once in a while, huh? I liked this one so much, because there was so much anger and power behind your words. It just made it even stronger. I know plenty of people like the one you're describing, and I would love to right something like this about them. Great work!

~*Nikki*~

~*I'd rather you hate me for what I am than love me for what I'm not.*~

TopGunLauren
Senior Member

since 2000-08-02

Posts 718
California

18 posted 2001-11-08 06:08 PM

Yeah I also have a few people I would like to give this to.But anyway I loved this poem and keep up the great work.
Lauren

Jenn Cirrincione

Member Elite

since 2000-07-02

Posts 2107
Fl

19 posted 2001-11-08 08:44 PM

You know I really did like this. Venting is so theraputic. I agree with Jesa, lots of great attitude. And to the person with the "destructive" comment. Hey, play fair. Honesty is fine, but everyone views art a little differently, and remember that everyone has feelings that can be hurt. Ease up.

Keep it up Kevin, venting is always better than actually seeking revenge.

Jenn

"I want love on my own terms; after everything I've ever learned. Me, I carry too much baggage..."

Irish Rose
Member Patricius

since 2000-04-06

Posts 10263

20 posted 2001-11-10 05:12 PM

Jenn is right venting feels kinda good

revenge never hurts anyone but the person seeking it.

Kathleen
nickname "Kay"
also wrote as The Lady of Shallot
"be true to yourself"

krystlebabe19
Junior Member

since 2001-11-09

Posts 27

21 posted 2001-11-10 09:12 PM

I really loved your poem. I can also really relate to knowning the same kind of person. Well very nice work!

allie
Member

since 2001-07-09

Posts 218
Australia

22 posted 2001-11-10 09:15 PM

Great poem... everyone else thinks so too obviously... really liked this one! thankz,

ALLIE

"An artist must know how to convince others of the truth of his lies."
- Pablo Picasso (1881 - 1973)

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